Current value of our unique period property!

Geenie

I live in an arts and craft house. I would be delighted to know what the OP has in hers, feature wise?!

g_attrill

liberty_lily wrote: »

I don't even like the idea of storage facilities really, especially after I read one story the other day of a person whose wordly goods had been devoured/defecated on by an army of mice in the storage container

That doesn't sound like a proper storage service - the real ones are pretty clean and tidy and have controlled temperature so should be ok for antiques. A shed is definitely not recommended, the stuff would be ruined.

westlondonbuyer

Reading through the thread this morning, liberty_lily, you sound totally in love with - and very protective of - your house and its contents. Which is completely understandable as it was intended to be your "forever home".

I sympathise a great deal with your wish to be a good daughter to your parents and to not want to cause them further distress by expecting them to move to be nearer to you.

However, with your parents in increasingly poor health and your mother suffering from Alzheimer's, I think you have to ask yourself whether it really makes sense to uproot yourself and incur both a financial loss and the loss of your emotional stability (because, in great part, that's what a beloved family home represents) when your parents - and I'm truly sorry to have to say this - may not have long left?

As an only child, for example, you will need your friends near you to support you - but if you've moved elsewhere, they won't be able to come and see you as often. You won't be able to see them, because you will be caring for your parents.

This is going to be an upsetting situation for all parties but I can't help thinking the best solution would be to have your parents come and live near you, perhaps in sheltered accommodation or in a rented house nearby where you can be the primary - rather than sole - carer.

dopester

Sensitively put WLB. However I notice that it doesn't seem to be the only issue.

Unfortunately due to work commitments and family reasons (elderly parents living 150+ miles away) we now need to relocate asap so called in the local estate agents to value our house

liberty_lily

Geenie wrote: »

I live in an arts and craft house. I would be delighted to know what the OP has in hers, feature wise?!

Hi Geenie

It's great to hear from another arts & crafts fan! Our features are mainly concentrated on the main reception room - oak/tiled fireplace, oak plate rails, part beamed walls, oak floor, virtually double height bay window and double height vaulted/beamed ceiling. There is also an almost 'minstrel's gallery' type area where the bedroom above overhangs the rear part of this room with a small bullion glass window overlooking from above.The same bedroom also has extensive beams to one feature wall.

There are some carved wood/plaster panels. All downstairs floors (except the kitchen, conservatory and one other room) and windows are the original oak casement type. There is an original concealed coat storage area in the hall as well as panelling to the staircase.

The exterior is partially beamed/rendered with some carving and there are areas of herringbone brickwork.

The previous owners were not into this style at all and had not accentuated any of the features, but having said that at least they hadn't destroyed the character!

It's very hard to describe............will definitely have to add some pics!

Hope you don't mind me asking, what's yours like and what features does it have?

LL x

liberty_lily

westlondonbuyer wrote: »

Reading through the thread this morning, liberty_lily, you sound totally in love with - and very protective of - your house and its contents. Which is completely understandable as it was intended to be your "forever home".

I sympathise a great deal with your wish to be a good daughter to your parents and to not want to cause them further distress by expecting them to move to be nearer to you.

However, with your parents in increasingly poor health and your mother suffering from Alzheimer's, I think you have to ask yourself whether it really makes sense to uproot yourself and incur both a financial loss and the loss of your emotional stability (because, in great part, that's what a beloved family home represents) when your parents - and I'm truly sorry to have to say this - may not have long left?

As an only child, for example, you will need your friends near you to support you - but if you've moved elsewhere, they won't be able to come and see you as often. You won't be able to see them, because you will be caring for your parents.

This is going to be an upsetting situation for all parties but I can't help thinking the best solution would be to have your parents come and live near you, perhaps in sheltered accommodation or in a rented house nearby where you can be the primary - rather than sole - carer.

Thank you so much for your post WLB - I do really appreciate your kind words and efforts to advise. Regarding my parents - you are quite right, they probably won't be around for a great deal longer - although my paternal grandmother died a few days after her 100th birthday so there's every chance we could both be wrong there!

They had me quite late in life and as a result are now in their eighties whilst OH and I are in our early forties. Unfortunately though the whole moving closer to us scenario has already been investigated and it's a no-go area I'm afraid. A few years ago my dad made huge efforts to get my mum to leave their reasonably large three bedroom house and move to a more manageable flat, but she wouldn't have any of it - and that was only a stone's throw from their current home. Trouble is they've been there since the 1960's - it's only the second home they've owned and the first was a mistake. At around the time we moved here - over 150 miles from them remember (and we previously lived only a fifteen minute drive away) - we suggested either a large house with annex or else we showed them a house with a smaller one for them in the grounds. They wouldn't even consider either idea. That's despite the fact that until three years ago when we moved here my mum and I had either seen each other or at least spoken on the phone every day. Unfortunately alzheimers developed and I don't think she even misses me now. We've tried persuading my dad that if he were to go first it would be far better for her if we were closer, but whilst he appreciates that, he believes (perhaps correctly) that she needs to stay in the surroundings to which she is accustomed - so we would have to move closer to them.

As for friends here - whilst you are right and we are terribly attached to our home - we haven't really settled in the area and made many new friends............in fact I haven't made a single one! All my friends are back in my home town or close to it and whilst OH has made friends, they're not really the same as our 'old' friends, some of whom I've known since school days.

Regarding dopester's post about work commitments - currently OH is not tied to a job here, but runs an online business. He is intending to expand this to a bricks and mortar showroom one we have moved - this wouldn't be possible in the area we currently live in as the demographic is not right for his type of business.

Thanks again to all who have given advice!

LL x

westlondonbuyer

Thanks for the reply post, liberty_lily. It sounds like you've thoroughly considered all the possibilities, and selling up and moving might be for the best. Your house sounds fascinating and I'm another who'd love to see pictures if and when you get your listing onto Rightmove. Good luck with it all - life twists and turns but usually comes good (sound like my Granny now!)

ukmaggie45

Dear Liberty_lily, I am with westlondonbuyer's original post. Just for the record, I am an only child. I do not believe in parents expecting their children to up sticks from their home and move to be close to them. Parents' place is to support their kids, not be a burden on them.

My parents' parents both moved to be near to them. (My Welsh grandparents ended up having to move twice in one year due to my parents relocation for my father's work)

But then when my parents wanted us closer they expected us to move to be close to them rather than them moving.

Which sounds a bit like yours.

Stay in your house. If your parents need so much care, either let them pay for it via Social Services or move to be close to you.

How does your partner feel about leaving what sounds like your forever home?

We did live close enough (well, approx 45 mins travel each way before doing the shopping or whatever) to help my parents out a bit, but I'm disabled myself so it all fell to my husband to do it. Over 3 years or so we were both totally frazzled and never got meaningful time together.

Father had vascular dementia, mother nursed him till he had to go into nursing home. She went downhill very fast after that and ended up in nursing home with dementia herself. We don't know what kind, not that it matters really, but she was horrible to all of us (grandchildren included) and accused husband and me of all kinds of awful stuff like stealing their money. It's a truly dreadful disease.

But also mother was very difficult to deal with in a number of ways. Unlike you and your Mum, we were never that close.

Do think very hard about all this. Without wanting to sound unkind, your parents lives are drawing to an end, your life is still waiting to be lived. My parents were very hot on "duty", don't get pulled into that!

I'm sorry if I sound cruel. But don't let your parents manipulate you into doing what is best for them and not for you. Parents' place in life is to let go. And to me that means not pressurizing your kids to move 150 miles.

They had their chance to move closer and turned it down. They are being selfish (at least in my view).

Having said all that, your house sounds wonderful, and I re-iterate Geenie's post, would love to see some pictures. There's wonderful Arts and Crafts houses across the water from us in Port Sunlight. Though probably less grand than your house sounds - they were built for workers at Sunlight Soaps.

My very best wishes to you at a horrendously difficult time.

Maggie