Life after bankruptcy?

ani_26

Ah. Thats what i was. An adrenaline junkie.

Its been a long time since any adrenaline flowed through this body. Maybe thats the problem. Nothing creates adrenaline anymore. But at least it gives some understanding to a degree, of who i was and where i am. Maybe makes sense of the other night, too. Always got to push yourself to the limit. Why am i indestructible?

SazM030306

Good morning!

I think today I shall be a sloth Sent the older ones to school on their own this morning. Me and the baby are still in our pjs! I must start going to bed earlier, I never have the energy to get up in a morning!

I'm glad you still write here. I think yours is the longest running diary that I've ever read and kept up with! I can't wait for the happy ending

Have a productive day, with the various people..

Saz xxx

ani_26

SazM030306 wrote: »

Good morning!

I think today I shall be a sloth Sent the older ones to school on their own this morning. Me and the baby are still in our pjs! I must start going to bed earlier, I never have the energy to get up in a morning!

I'm glad you still write here. I think yours is the longest running diary that I've ever read and kept up with! I can't wait for the happy ending

Have a productive day, with the various people..

Saz xxx

Okay. I hold my hands up. You just made me laugh :rotfl:


Happy endings. That's the stuff dreams are made of, isn't it?


Now i feel like a work of fiction



haha


Okay. I have loads to do before my first appointment, for appointment tomorrow, ( why am i still having to do this?)


love nh xx

ani_26

Happy endings. Twill either be one or t'other, won't it? You've either got to drag the superhuman effort from somewhere, or,,,, Can you imagine? Ani lived happily ever after.


With a dog?

What is happiness?


People keep focusing on even the smallest thing to drag me out of this, but everything seems light years away.

Or worse still, unimaginable

ani_26

Yet another dr agrees i'm not a nutter or depressed. Well, i, know that already. I think its easy to underestimate the effect everything has had on me. Despite people saying do this, do that.They always say, the harder the fall, don't they? I've always lived life to the full. Every minute of it. Every second of it. Right in there, in the midst of it. No. Leading the way. Pah

Maybe thats why i'm an empty shell, now.


YEEEEEEEEAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGH


YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYO

EFIN FFFFFRRRRRUUUSSSSTTTTRRRRAAATTTIIIOOONNN

ani_26

Stuff sorted for next appointment tomorrow. Yes. Its me that did it. It doesn't matter. Of course it does, otherwise what is the point? When would i ever give up trying at anything. This is me you're talking about. Isn't it? Dla forms finally hit appropriate office. Same for housing benefit. Don't know what's happened to esa. Patience isn't one of my traits, but haven't i been patient long enough? I've been off sick for what, 6 weeks now? Jeez. I've been going through this particular saga for months now. Yes. Its real. Maybe its hard to understand how someone could completely give up the will for virtually anything. You all underestimate my strength and what i'm about. Tell yourself enough, and you might start to believe it. I'm not your average person. I'm effin superhuman

Is it beyond the realms of possibility i might start along the road of a debt free wannabe in the not too distant future? Crikey. Its been the longest, most bizarre route. Its back to stage one.

ani_26

Just reading a thread there. Depression or stress. Of course thats the big difference. Sometimes i'm thick. Dealing or coping with prolonged stress. Everyone is in agreement the stress needs taking out of my life. Redress the balance. How can anyone cope with this amount of stress for so long? Going back to work just isn't going to help, for all those who don't understand what its like.

How i hate this time of night, these days. No motivation to go to bed, and no motivation to get up. Time is endless. The night is endless

miggy

Is it today? Happy Birthday if so!

And of course one of these:

:bdaycake:

and the flash mob:

:beer::beer::beer::beer::beer:

Now you're going to tell me I got the wrong day, aren't you?

Hovel_lady

I'd better wait for find out if it's the right day before going in search of party balloons then

ani_26

Yup, today's the day. Another day, another year, huh? From what i remember, i think i was born around 4.00 am. I seem to remember my mum saying i was in a rush to get into the world. Maybe its the other way round, now.