Sharing the bills

property.advert

The only fair way is to pay half and to suggest otherwise means one person having a free ride at the other's expense to some degree or another. It is different if you have kids and one income stops but you have to discuss that beforehand. If there is a large disparity in income, then one person will shoulder more of the non essential spending but if that translates into joint assets such as a house, then it should be apportioned fairly in favour of the larger contributor.

If you live together forever then it doesn't matter if he owns 90% of it. If you divorce, then she should not get more than she puts in. Same whichever sex puts in most. It isn't fair for one party to pay in 90% and only get 50% back. That is communism.

cfnc

I have been living with my husband for the last 23 years and we now have 5 children. We have always had a joint account and consult each other on any large expenses. Well I do, my DH consults me on all purchases lol.
My view is, if you are commiting to each other, then everything is pooled. We have seperate saving accounts, but are there for' US' when needed.

Kirsty

Tish_P

property.ad,

Couples provide each other with lots of things other than money - housework, social support, gardening, unpaid PA work, and so on. It'd be almost impossible to really work out who owed what to whom when a marriage dissolves, so starting from a 50% each assumption is really the fairest. In special circumstances someone who felt (s)he was being ripped off could take it to court for more.

My chap and I aren't married and earn about the same, so I have no dog in this fight. I'm just saying that if you don't want to share your stuff with someone, you shouldn't sign a legal agreement in which you explicitly agree to share all your stuff with someone.

GEEGEE8

property.advert wrote: »

The only fair way is to pay half and to suggest otherwise means one person having a free ride at the other's expense to some degree or another. It is different if you have kids and one income stops but you have to discuss that beforehand. If there is a large disparity in income, then one person will shoulder more of the non essential spending but if that translates into joint assets such as a house, then it should be apportioned fairly in favour of the larger contributor.

If you live together forever then it doesn't matter if he owns 90% of it. If you divorce, then she should not get more than she puts in. Same whichever sex puts in most. It isn't fair for one party to pay in 90% and only get 50% back. That is communism.

This is what we have decided, despite me being a student with no part time job as of yet, and him working full time.

I know he will pay for days out and the upkeep and fuel of the car that drives us about, but that is all optional and he can decide not to go out for dinner, golf, snowboarding etc if his money is tight.

All my bills will go on the household 50%, but it's only the same as what I am paying living on my own..

Also, I can just imagine in an argument the fact that the other person pays more would be seen as supporting that person, so I guess 50/50 makes it equal and fair.

Plus, one day I'll be on more money than him lol, so I'll be the winner then!

babyb06

My OH moved in with me about a year ago, we split all bills 60:40, with me paying the higher share as I earn more than him (I offerred this 6 months ago as I thought it was fair, previously it had been split equally). So, at the moment we have our wages paid into our own account and he transfers his share of the bill money to me (bills are still all in my name).

This works well at the moment, but the trouble is the future (even once married) - he sees seperate accounts as the way forward - he thinks we should remain with our wages going into our own individual accounts but we open a joint account into which we each pay a sum to cover all bills/groceries, the rest remains in our own accounts and is our own to do what we wish with.

I would like a joint account where all our wages go in and then we take what money out he wants and if he wants privacy on some spending (which I understand for presents etc) we transfer a sum out into our own accounts each month. He will not hear any of this and it is really frustrating me!

I think my solution is much fairer but he hates discussing finances and digs his heels in the sand:mad:, refusing to say how he spends his money (I cannot understand why he is strapped at the end of every month as I roughly know his outgoings) but says he can't afford to save anything and that is that.

A long rant there I am afraid! Sorry! But that is my experience

dark_lady

My ex was like this. It only gets worse. He refused to talk finances except to say he was nine grand in debt,refused to tell me why and really made me suffer for it.See the thread "is this miserly or just moneysaving" post no. 91. Turned out he had spent thousands on mobile phone contracts and calls chasing the woman he fancied before me who he didnt even sleep with according to him. There was just no way i was paying for his mistakes. He even refused to take responsibility for his own actions blaming her for the debt. Thats like a stalker blaming his victim. The fact that he was secretive,refused to take responsibility and was tight fisted because of it made me end it. It is never a good sign when someone is secretive about money especially when you go short because of it!