At what age would you leave children alone ?

clairehi

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Someone in our parish has just had their house gutted by an electrical fire, that happened while they were all asleep in their beds. Had she not been up and noticed the smoke, they, all three generations, may well be sleeping permanently.

I hope they will be getting smoke alarms fitted straightaway! (Once the house is repaired of course)

miss_independent

Wow, I must have had a pretty bad upbringing . At 6 my parents put me to bed (with strict instructions not to get up) and my mum and dad used to go to a car park 15 mins away (for about an hour) so my dad could teach my mum how to drive in the evening. For as long as I can remember I was left alone downstairs whilst parents were upstairs or vice versa. Once, aged 8 I "ran away from home" in the afternoon. It was the summer and when it got dark (:eek:) I realised that no one had realized I had gone! As an only child, you would think it wouldn't be hard to notice I wasn't there :rotfl:. I used to get the bus home from school and into town at 9 and I would go ice-skating alone (involving two bus changes and a half hour journey each way) at age 10. From about 9, I often used to get the bus into town and meet my mum in a cafe for dinner. She was always late, so I used to go in, find a table, order and pay then eat and no one seemed to think it was strange that there was a little kid sat alone in her school uniform tucking into sausage and chips! It was the mid 90's too so not even that long ago! I realise now how lucky I was as I was very vulnerable although by the time I was 12 I had been felt up twice by strangers .

From being about 12, if I was ill off school my parents would stay at work whilst I was at home and from 13 I was a proper latch key kid. Most nights my Dad would work evening then night shifts and my mum wouldn't get in from work until 10.30pm most evenings. I had to cook for myself etc and my parents trusted me very much. I never brought anyone else into the house. When I was about 15 they both used to do night duty and leave me alone in the house all night. I used to get scared sometimes (once someone tried to break in at night) and never liked answering the door when I was in on my own. It wasn't right and I was pretty lonely but my parents needed to work and we didn't have any family down here that could look after me.

If I had kids though, it would be a totally different story! Mollycoddled is the word that springs to mind!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Oh dear, that means that anyone with sleep apnoea (who can zone out with no warning for about 20 seconds - 5 minutes of an afternoon, for example, before coming back round abruptly) might be regarded as being incapable of caring for their children...

savingmummy

Well my children are 4 and 2 (so young) and i really cant leave them for 2 mins quite literally.
I lost my little boy whilst at a relatives house, there were 6 adults awake in the same room and he still escaped from all of us!! After realising we found the front porch door ajar - Found 3-4mins later wondering down the village alongside the road with oncoming cars.
My DD has also recently swallowed a plastic toy, wondered out in the garden locking herself out and also opened the front door using a stool to watch the binmen - all high risk and could of lead to injury/death and happens alot especially if parents are not around!

miss_independent

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Oh dear, that means that anyone with sleep apnoea (who can zone out with no warning for about 20 seconds - 5 minutes of an afternoon, for example, before coming back round abruptly) might be regarded as being incapable of caring for their children...

Sleep Apnoea? What about Narcolepsy?! :eek:

lilac_rainbow

Sorry to drag up an old thread but I've been reading this with great interest.

I have 2 kids, one is 10 & one is 3. I leave the 10 year old on his own now & again for short periods of time ie to do the nursery run if his school is closed, or to grab something for tea. I don't ever leave him to look after his sister though. I do shower when she's up. She usually stands by the tub watching me and playing with her bath toys.

When ds was 7 I would regularly sleep on the sofa and give him the tv remote, can't do it now coz she literally bounces off my head

Op - do you still do the same?

FBaby

I am amazed as over protective some parents are in this country. My boy who is 8 in 4 days has been getting up on his own since he was 3 or 4 and entertaining himself until I woke up. He used to be up at 6am at time and he was just fine, usually watching tv or playing the wii. My daugther is 11 today and I've been leaving her on her own at home for up to an hour 1/2 for the past year (usually once a week when I take her brother to his swimming class). I would have been happy for her to stay on her own since she was 9, but she had to be ready herself which she now is. I have left both of them on occasions, never more than 1/2 hour though. My daughter has a mobile, we live on a residential street and close to our neighbours, but most importantly, I have brought up my kids to be responsible and not get into trouble. They have no interest in getting up to no good just because mummy is not here to see us.

Spendless

lilac_rainbow wrote: »

Sorry to drag up an old thread but I've been reading this with great interest.

I have 2 kids, one is 10 & one is 3. I leave the 10 year old on his own now & again for short periods of time ie to do the nursery run if his school is closed, or to grab something for tea. I don't ever leave him to look after his sister though. I do shower when she's up. She usually stands by the tub watching me and playing with her bath toys.

When ds was 7 I would regularly sleep on the sofa and give him the tv remote, can't do it now coz she literally bounces off my head

Op - do you still do the same?

Me too! And I was one of the ones who replied saying I'd leave my then 10.5yo upto 40minutes-ish. He's now 2 months from his 11th birthday and I'd now leave him upto an hour and a half, depending on where I was and what time it was. I expect that to build up again as he turns 11 and the nights become lighter and again when he starts secondary school in September.:)

lilac_rainbow

Spendless wrote: »

Me too! And I was one of the ones who replied saying I'd leave my then 10.5yo upto 40minutes-ish. He's now 2 months from his 11th birthday and I'd now leave him upto an hour and a half, depending on where I was and what time it was. I expect that to build up again as he turns 11 and the nights become lighter and again when he starts secondary school in September.:)

I can't wait for secondary school age when he can be given more independence. Not because I want to do things without him but we have a biggish age gap & it'll be so good for him to do age-appropriate activities with his friends without having a little girl dragging along behind him

Angel_Jenny

I used to have quite a lot of responsibility and freedom from a young age. My brother is a couple of years younger than me and from 8 ish I would be allowed to look after him for 30 mins while my mum was busy. I loved it!

I also used to get dropped off at the library for a couple of hours on my own from about 11. Loved that too! I could be left on my own for hours so long as I had a book with me - I didn't even look up usually. I used to get lost in Emma or Little Women.

I remember my mum running into my room as she heard me sobbing - she thought I was hurt but Beth had just died in Little Women. I must have been about 7.