Fell off the Train

EllaKeat

Good onya Marleyboy! I am five foot one and waded in when I saw two schoolboys (15or 16yrs) beating the cr*p out of a young lad with a golf club They backed down immediately, but I was in so much trouble with OH, parents etc., when I told them. That was a few years ago, and I don't know if I might think twice now? Probably not - it's just instinct isn't it?

madget_2

EllaKeat wrote: »

At the risk of sounding like a cliche, is this a problem in cities where no one has any 'buy in'? I have been horrified reading these stories, but live in the North East - a small village admittedly, but have witnessed a few falls/trips/acidents in the bigger towns around here and have just have not been quick enough to get to the person involved without barging aside the dozens who have already gathered to help out!! To be honest, i always thought the vast majority were just being a bit nosey and busy bodyish, but I have to say, the alternative is frightening! I also think there must be a knock on effect too, if you see that helping people out is the norm, you are far more likely to get involved yourself. I travel to London regularly and think nothing of doing what I can to help out, and have done so on a few occassions (nothing major, just helping a guy in a wheelchair and helping to pick up the contents of a shopping bag)! But, I probably do that because it is expected behaviour.....
Hope everyone above is doing okay now:D

I'm from the rural North East, too, and agree that people there were quick to help anyone in trouble. Mind you, I remember fainting in the queue for a cafe in the Metro Centre and having people stepping over me and pretending I wasn't there. So yes, I think it's a big city thing.

Having said that, I've also seen some people in large cities helping others out, but I think urbanites can often be more suspicious as they sometimes expect people to be drunk, on drugs or to mug them.

Such a shame.

I was brought up to offer my help to anyone who looks to be in need and will continue to do so.

OP - I do hope that your ankle is better soon, and I'm very saddened to hear that no one helped you.

marleyboy

madget wrote: »

I've also seen some people in large cities helping others out, but I think urbanites can often be more suspicious as they sometimes expect people to be drunk, on drugs or to mug them.

Such a shame.

This is so true, I am from a Big City, I can remember leaving a cinema with a group of friends, outside was an old man rolling around the floor, everyone, including myself (Im ashamed to admit) walked passed assuming he was drunk (there are a lot of drunks rolling on the floor in Manchester), but one of my friends Girlfriends insisted we check he was ok, so we approached him.

It turned out he had slipped and cracked his knee, he was rolling around in agony, thats when we helped him up, whilst someone else phoned for an ambulance for him.

I felt so guilty and learned a harsh lesson about ignorance, from now on, ever since, whether drunk or not, I always feel compelled to check they are ok, even at the risk of being told to "F OFF" by them.

Introuble28

Thanks for all your replies, its interesting to hear everyone's stories.

I think my ankle will be ok, its rather black now but I can move a wee bit better today.

The sad this is, I live in Hamilton which is in Scotland and not really that big really. I could understand if it was the centre of London but not in a small town.

Still, it could have been worse I suppse. Am a little embarrased now that I have to still get that train! Maybe I will throw dirty looks at the people that didnt help me!:p

mookiandco

I remember when I was driving down the street (in London) and I saw a little old lady trip on the pavement and fall on her face. I stopped the car and went to help her. There were lots of people walking on the street but they literally stepped over her. I told her to keep still in case anything was broken and gave her some tissues to hold on her bleeding nose. Its a sign of our times that when I was helping her and got her blood on me she said 'dont worry dear I dont have aids or anything'!. Someone else then came over and I went to get some more tissues from a cafe. When I got back they had her standing up! So I went back into the cafe to ask if she could sit in there (it was freezing cold in winter) and the waitress said she would ask the manager! 2 minutes later someone came out and plonked a chair in the middle of the pavement! I had called an ambulance and when it came I asked her if she wanted me to come with her or call someone for her. She asked me to call her son to ask him to come to the hospital. I called the son again later that day to find out how she was and he said she was just battered and bruised and thanked me for helping her.

I dont understand how people can just walk on by and turn a blind eye.

I hope you feel better soon OP.

Fuzzy_Duck

KittyPryde wrote: »

Could be the 'Kitty Genovese Syndrome/Effect'.

We learnt about that at Uni. It was in 1964 when a woman in New York was raped and murdered. Up to 38 people either witnessed the attack or heared her screams over a 45 minute period but no one went to help because they all assumed someone else would help. It was about diffusion of responsibility and the larger amount of people around, the less likely it is that someone will feel responsible to help.


I can understand that some people may have reservations about intervening if there is a danger to themselves, but it's sad that not a lot of people are even willing to help people who have fallen etc.

That was an awful case. Nowadays I think a big problem is that people tend to scream as if they're being murdered for no reason- you just start ignoring it because it's probably kids messing about. Of course there's no excuse for seeing someone being attacked/hurt and not doing anything.

Indie_Kid

I hve stopped to help people before and they have been polite about it. One time, it was a group of people and there was someone laying on the floor (I think) and he was bleeding. I asked if they wanted any help and they said no thanks.

I've also had some people help me out too - even though it's just been "I am slightly lost. Please can you tell me where I find <place>".

GEEGEE8

Me and my friend were walking home from school when I was about 14, and we used to take a shortcut through the park. There was sometimes an old drunk guy on one of the benches, never did any harm, but a proper homeless guy. Well, not sure what happened, but one day we went past and he had blood all over his face, he was a mess.. I stayed with him, and my friend ran to the Police station up the road.

I didn't say anything to him, as he did seem drunk, but I stood next to him and gradually a couple of others stopped too. Ambulance came and said well done to us as he needed a lot of stitches.

Never found out what happened, but I hope he had a nice stay in the hospital for a few days.

Southsaver_2

When I was working at a few train stations (steam locomotive), I was told a boy fell between the train and the platform on a day I wasn't there. Apparently my colleagues had to ask the parents if it's okay to help him once they have got on to the tracks; to see if he wasn't badly injured. Luckily, he only came off with a few cuts and bruises but for a child it is a big drop. Even if we could stop a child from being seriously hurt, we have to step back and let it happen as the parents could sue. We just grin at parents who nudge their children off the train instead of getting off first, then helping their kids off (the train is over a foot higher than the platform).

We can help adults (and I did a few times) but helping/touching children is not allowed without permission. It's so stupid that we have to follow those kinds of rules in today’s society. Someone told me once that a teacher had to phone the parents of a child to ask permission to put a plaster on the child's arm; turned out that the mum came in to the school to do it herself. I find that kind of pathetic, but I haven’t got my own kids so it might not be.

tbw

WolfSong2000 wrote: »

I seem to remember there being sort of psychological explanation (apparently)...something along the lines of, if an accident/incident happens in a crowded place, everyone assumes that someone else will deal with it. This is men have managed to get away with raping women on subway trains (think it happened in New York). You're actually better off having an accident/getting attacked in an area with less people as theoretically those fewer people will feel more obliged to help? Who knows?

Its called 'bystander apathy' - everyone assumes that somebody else will sort it out. Even more common these days when people are afraid of repercussions if their 'hlp' makes it worse!