Changing our lives....

Sessie

On a decluttering note (which, let's face it, has become rather UNmentioned lately!!) I got a magazine from the National Trust recently as we are members. Inside there was an envelope asking for old mobile phones as they can claim the money for them and use it for upkeep of properties etc...

I found FOUR!! yes FOUR!!! old phones in the children's play drawers which I sent off to them. The children used to play with them a lot but they have become rather old hat since they found "daddy's contuter" (ie; computer)!!

So, four less cluttery things in the house... hey, it all counts!!

x

Sessie

Goodness I've been away a while!!

Has been a bit of a mad week though. Sadly my mum had an accident on Tuesday and spent most of the day in hospital and is now home with a huge leg brace on and using crutches!! She had taken my children to playgroup with my dad and as it was ending, she took Boychild to change him, carrying him. As she came out, he wanted to get down and walk and what a stroke of luck that was!! A few steps later she gets this AGONISING pain in her knee and falls flat. Ambulance called and taken to hospital, waits for hours to see someone, whilst dad brings the children to my work where I have to leave early and take them up to mum's house to do all her washing and drying whilst dad goes back to the hospital.

Turns out she's probably torn ligaments in her knee or her meniscus (ooh sounds painful!) and she has since seen another doc who says she needs a full knee replacement. She has had problems with her knee for years with bad arthritis so in one way this has been a blessing in (damned good!) disguise and it's now made her realise she needs the op. She will prob have it done just before Xmas as they tell her she'll be up and about after a couple of days although it will still be a while before she's totally mobile again. She will have finished her job by then (she is in the process of bowing out of it now, will be done by the start of December) and I am off quite a bit of December so can keep the children so she has a good time to recover.

So I have had the children all day every day myself since then and so by their bedtime have been too BUSHED to get on here!!

Anyhow, brief break for a coffee and time for an update methinks....

x

Sessie

So Wednesday morning Boychild, Girlchild and I are sitting eating crumpets with lemon curd on in front of Milkshake (kids' TV on CH5) waiting for the gas man to come as the boiler had broken down on Tuesday (didn't know until we got back from mum's mid-evening so rang B Gas at 8 pm and they still arranged to come first thing next day - SO SO grateful we kept the Homecare thing going!).

Between Noddy and Fifi I spy an ad saying Morrisons are doing an offer on nappies - two boxes (of 68!) for £10! That (for those of you not in need of nappies) is a DARNED good deal - in A5da they are 2 boxes for £18 and I daren't THINK what they are in T3sco as I haven't shopped there in AGES due to their prices and also their misleading shelf labelling (don't get me STARTED....:mad:).

So I think, ".. the sun is shining, we could all do with some fresh air and a change of scenery.... we'll get the bus and go and get some". The bus pretty much picks us up five minutes from home and drops us off five minutes from the smaller Morrisons in our city. It's about three miles. Remember that. THREE MILES.....

TV off, children changed, coats on, buggy out from back of car (remember I don't drive), juice made, dummies located, purse found, TV turned off again, eight cuddly toys removed from buggy, one child strapped in, come back inside for second child, TV turned off AGAIN, unclench child's hand from eight cuddly toys AGAIN, take crying child out and strap into buggy. Distract with a biscuit (INSTANTLY the crying stops!)... set off, turn round and go back and lock front door, set off again, turn round, come back, unlock front door and get my OWN coat... you get the picture! Just an ordinary outing with twins!

So we get to Morrisons and sure enough, piles of boxes of nappies by the door on this offer, even lots in the size I need. I had even been organised enough to ring the shop before we set off to ask if I could unpack two of the boxes (once I'd paid for them of course!) and stuff the packs under the buggy and leave the boxes at the store and they had said yes. So, I thought, that'll be OK, I can balance the other two boxes on the buggy handles for the five mins to the bus and five mins from the bus to our house......

Only... the bus didn't come.... waited and waited... twenty mins after it was due (it's never late, ever!) someone asks which I'm waiting for and when I tell her, rolls her eyes and tells me no WONDER I'm standing here.... the bus isn't coming this way at the moment as there are roadworks on the route ahead so it goes the OTHER way... and there won't be another one for an hour at least. Fan-frickin'-tastic. We've been out a while, the children will need changing reasonably soon plus they'll want lunch and to get out of the buggy (their sitting patience is lowering rapidly as they grow up, they want to be up and at 'em). So I figure I'll walk about a mile to another stop where there's a different bus that goes close enough to home. So I balance the boxes on the buggy handles, holding them in place with my forearms and way too many times having to drop my chin onto the top of one of them to nudge them back into place. Whilst pushing TWO children in a double buggy.

Approximately every eight steps one or both of the boxes falls off the buggy handles. At least three times they fall forwards onto the children's heads. This does not go down well.:o

Many MANY falls later (on the ground not on the children!) we are approaching the bus stop when said bus... whizzes past me, despite my frantic waving and zooms away leaving me about twenty steps from the stop. I check the timetable, not another one for FORTY FIVE MINUTES!! :mad::eek:

So I end up walking the WHOLE of the way home. THREE. MILES. And yes actually, the boxes continued to fall off every eight steps I took and yes, it was UTTERLY INFURIATINGLY annoying!! By the time I got home both children DEFINITELY needed changing and were somewhat fed up and whiny, my back was KILLING me (and did so for the rest of the week) and I was exhausted.

Settled the children in front of a Dora The Explorer DVD, made myself a coffee, sank down in my chair just as the phone rang. My sister, chirpy as anything, ".. I saw that deal in Morrisons on the nappies so I've got you four boxes, I'll bring them round tomorrow is that okay?"

GGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!

(wonders why there isn't a *bangs head repeatedly against wall* smiley)

x

saorsie

:wall::wall::wall::wall:!!

-s-

Sessie

LOL! Thanks for that!

Today I went to mum's to help her out with some of her work and Mr Sessie took the children to his parents for the day. Whilst it's nice to get a break from them (sometimes including him yes!!) I started missing them by about 3 pm. How sad am I? Moan that I never get a break and then when I do (albeit a working one!) I want them back!!

When we got back Mr Sessie made a "storecupboard dinner"! Hurrah all my talk of being on this board seems to have finally filtered in!! :j It was a bit of a hotch potch of two small portions of reduced meat from the freezer, various veg that were close to furriness but still OK and some chilli mix, onions and garlic. Worked just fine for me! Again we've gone two weeks without going shopping (apart from just for milk and fruit) and this time we've coped much better. We do need quite a bit now though, mainly meat and veg and quite a lot of householdy stuff - bleach, washing up liquid etc... but I'm going to see if my sister (the nappy buying one!) can take me to Mr M's some time this week as mum is incapacitated.

Annoyingly, the Book People have been mega-efficient and tried to deliver my order yesterday whilst we were out at Eureka in Halifax. The children LOVE it there and we have a pass that gets us in FREE whenever we want for a year so we are trying to make good use of that as much as we can. I had only sent the order in to The Book People on Thursday so they'll have got it on Friday and tried to deliver it on Saturday!! Now that's service!! So have to go and get that after work tomorrow.

Oh, whilst at Eureka we had some lunch and the children's haddock "goujons" (read: fried in breadcrumbs) were just AWFUL. Rock hard, dry as toast... inedible. Usually I just moan a bit at the table and leave but not now... I took them back and (politely!) said they weren't good enough, even I couldn't chew them never mind my two year olds! The guy immediately gave me a refund AND cooked the children some sausages!! Bonus!! So, money back AND got fed! :T

I must say though, the food there is usually really good (if a bit expensive) so don't take it that you shouldn't eat there.

Had a good clearout in the kitchen this morning, it now looks like something out of a show home. It won't last long but it was nice to stand at the door smiling tonight after tea. Was going to do the ironing but... basically.... couldn't be bothered!!

Think that's about it. This week I need to try to get some time to ring our mortgage peeps about getting a £10k extension - maybe dad can take the children to the park as they follow me around laughing and shouting whenever they see me on the phone these days and it gets a bit difficult! Have talked about the reasons for this in earlier posts so won't go over it again.

The garage, (STILL without a light :mad:), is fast becoming my MSE store cupboard. It has the sloe gin fermeting/brewing in there, it has boxes galore of washing powder bought on offers here and there and now the nappy box mountain! Oh and I'm saving jars for next year for making marmalade, jam and chutney! REALLY need to sort out a man coming to get rid of the stuff we DON'T need so I can fill it again with stuff we DO! :rotfl:

x

EB69

Hi Sessie - thanks for pointing me to your diary - what a busy mum you are! I remember the days well - my kids were three years apart but I did some childminding when they were little - the story about walking back from Morrisons reminded me of the day my car broke down when I was out with a 5 year old, two three year olds (in a double buggy) and a two year old (I was only dropping the little one to her mum's - she wasn't even one of my little charges!). It was in the days before mobiles and I have never been so terrified in my life - I had to effectively balance the two year old on the handlebars of the double buggy holding her round her waist whilst pushing with the other hand and begging the 5 year old not to let go! Fortunately we didnt have far to go before we found a phone box but I still have nightmares about it now!

Anyway, will drop by for the catch up soon xx

Sessie

Welcome EB!

Yesterday, managed to speak to the bank about increasing the mortgage and, after a LONG (45 minute) phone call (that the girl on the phone said would take 15 minutes!!) it has been agreed in principle so they are sending out the forms in the next day or so.

Today, spoke to our mortgage advisor as the bank gave me quotes for various different deals - ie; putting the £10k on a repayment basis or an interest only basis (the actual mortgage is the latter) and also on a 2 year fixed interest rate or a 2 year tracker. Discussed these and spoke to Mr Sessie and have decided to go for the 2 year fixed interest only one as the new ISA that we are arranging is for more than the current mortgage PLUS this extra £10k.

So, a nice long form to fill in is on its way to us, together with having to gather together payslips etc.. to send with it. However it's nice to know we will be much closer to getting sorted and CC free soon which will free up £205 a month (we currently pay £250 a month to the CC and the extra cost of the £10k is only £45 a month, rather better I think you'll agree!).

Did a tide-us-over shop in Morrison's yesterday, just basics really and fresh stuff. Got quite a bit of meat as there were some good deals on. Oh, bought the children's advent calendars as there was a Noddy one and a Hello Kitty one and they each love those characters. Those will probably arrive with the elves on 1 December.

Did see an LED torch, quite a big one too, for £3.00 (I know!! I had to check the price too!) but not until I'd got through the checkout. It was on the display where they had the fireworks and I was in a rush to get back to the children so I didn't get one but I might see if I can get back and get one for winter for emergencies.

Oh and miracle of miracles .... I phoned Mr Sessie to tell him the bank had agreed the mortgage extension (as he has been nagging me to ring them for days - not really considering that I have been at work and then had the twins on my own due to mum's incapacity so when have I had TIME to make a 45 min call?! I only got to make the call yesterday as dad had taken them for a walk whilst I went shopping and I RACED round the shop so I could get back and make the call). Anyhow, back to the miracle, Mr Sessie arrived home.... EARLY... WITH the light fitting for the garage and fitted it immediately!!! :T. Woohoo! Now I can go in the garage without panicking I'm going to kick over my demijohns of sloe gin!

Also, apparently Asda are doing a deal on nappies now!!! :mad: A box of 100 or so for £12. I was only TOLD this, haven't verified it anywhere so anyone who is interested in that, please check with your store before going there. Shame we already have a nappy mountain, along with all the "shennanigans" THAT involved!

I really want to get to Home Bargains and other cheapy shops, and even to have a mooch around Mr T's toys for stocking fillers and elf gifts but trying to get a day without children at the mo is almost impossible. I have put in an order with a company called Party Pieces (might have mentioned them before) as they do quite a good selection of little toys. Have also ordered some wooden letters on wheels and an engine and truck to go at either end with the children's names for part of their Xmas present.

(This is more of a reminder for me: phoned the doc today and left message with reception that the Pain Clinic should have written to him by now prescribing me gabapentin and asking, unless I need to see him for this, can he leave me a prescription at reception that I can pick up as and when. Need to remember to actually go and get it! I know you'd think that if I'm in pain I'd remember but as I'm ALWAYS in pain I tend to just "put up with it". Hopefully this will help. I also have an appointment at the Pain Clinic on Friday 29th October - not actually sure what that's for, I thought they would just see me last time, prescribe whatever, support GP's letter to NHS Exceptions Committee to see if I can get injections on the NHS and that was it. Anyhow, it's a trip out eh?? ).)

Okay, a quick trip over to the Old Style and Special Occasions Boards and I truly WILL be logging off at 9.30 pm tonight. I need an early night, the children are tiring me out and my back IS bad at the mo. See y'all again soon.

x

Sessie

On lunch at work at the mo.

The application form for the mortgage extension arrived today so that will take up my evening once the children are in bed so thought I'd post a bit now.

Can't WAIT to pay off that Halifax CC and be free of it!!

As the money side of things seems to be sorting itself out at the mo, have decided to concentrate more on the house/decluttering element of the life changing for a while.

The other day I managed to get over half of the ironing done as the children were in a great mood and happy playing in the sandpit. Also cleaned the kitchen and microwave and sorted some of their toys out. I do need (again! already!) to go through their clothes as there are again things that don't fit any more. We have just found out that an old friend is pregnant though she doesn't know what it is yet - so whatever she IS having, will give her Boychild or Girlchild's cast-offs and give the others to charity shops.

I'm also going to make a Christmas Eve hamper for the children - just a simple one as they are too young to "get it" really. It will be more of a "treat night" to them I suppose. I'm going to get them some pyjamas from Matalan - Peppa Pig and Roary The Racing car - to wear on the night, some Dora/Thomas bath bubbles, a couple of small toys - cars, fluffies or something. Have started talking about "Father Christmas" and his sleigh and reindeer and presents so maybe by then it will be fixed in their minds to a degree. Might get a plate and cup to leave him some food out (that we can keep and use each year, festive design or something). I think this will also be a nice tradition to start now.

REALLY want to get to all the pound shops and supermarkets for their little toys - will prob have to ask MIL to take the children one Saturday when I'm not working as mum's operation is fixed for the end of November so I won't get much, if any, free time before then and then she will be recovering so I won't get any for the first couple of weeks of December. I don't want to wait that late and also I need some things for the elves to give the children so I'll need to go in the next couple of weeks really.

Am quite excited to try a few of the crafts from the books I got from The Book People myself. Won't be able to do any of them with the children this year but next year there are a good few we will be able to all do as a family for fun.

Also need to think about organising an online delivery from the supermarket a few days before Xmas, doubtless Xmas Eve and 23rd delivery slots will already have been taken but what I want is more "staples" - bread, milk, tins, cat food, toiletries etc... so it can come a bit earlier. HATE HATE HATE that Xmas food shop close to the day, so packed, so unable to get anywhere, so much time at the checkout... there's NO WAY I'm doing that this year.

I would like to be fully organised and stocked up by no later than Tuesday 21st if possible so we can have a nice few days run-up just playing with the children and watching Xmassy things and doing whatever the elves bring.

Okay, back to work for now, may well not get on tonight but will be back soon.

x

Sessie

So the mortgage forms are filled in all but a few questions I need to talk through with them tonight after the children are in bed. Have all the documents (last 3 months payslips for both of us, tax credits info etc...) ready. Just need to copy everything for me (they want originals which they will send back) and then get it off. The letter says the money will be with us within three days of receiving our completed application but I'll believe THAT when I see it!! Still, we are another step closer to being RID of the CC. Woohoo!!

Have just had a conversation at work and I am the ONLY person - in a committed or married relationship - who completely shares the family money. What I mean is no money is "my" money or "Mr Sessie's" money, it's all "ours" and so long as the bills are paid and the children are fed and clothed, either of us could buy something if we wanted it without having to "ask" the other or "borrow" from one another. Every other person I spoke to (there are a few of us on a big desk) that wasn't in a short term or new relationship said, "ooh no, my money is mine and his is his...". I am STAGGERED! Maybe it's me but.. isn't the whole point of being in a marriage/long term relationship about SHARING, sharing everything you have including money and the responsibility that goes with it??

One of Mr Sessie's workmates has a girlfriend who has racked up a pretty big debt on her card on one of those online bingo sites. The workmate has washed his hands of it, isn't helping her with repayments saying it's nothing to do with him, he didn't run it up so why should he pay it? Whilst in one sense I can see his point, this is the mother of his CHILDREN we are talking about!! They are still together, the relationship is just the same by the way, they haven't split up, he just won't have anything to do with helping her out of this debt.

Mr Sessie and I have always said if one of us did that (Ha! Hardly likely!)... whilst we would initially be FURIOUS - and would probably bring it up at every available opportunity - it would be down to BOTH of us to sort it out as quickly as we could to get things back on an even keel. We have been together almost 20 years, a stupid thing like money isn't going to break THAT! I know that might sound naiive but like I said, yes I'd be FURIOUS and it would take a long time to rebuild the trust but... his problems are MY problems and vice versa. Otherwise, why are we together?

So am I wrong? Am I in the minority? Anyone still reading keep "their" money separate from their partner/husband or do you put it all in the pot like we do?

Would be interested in any replies...

x

Keebs

Hi, not in a long term relationship so can't say from experience but always assumed monies would be a shared thing.

Re friend refusing to help out his girlfriend. Having read a few diaries here where one person is striving for debt freedom but their partner keeps racking up the debts I can sort of see where he's comming from. Maybe this isn't the first time and paying it off herself is the only way she'll learn?

If she's not particularly spendthrift normally and this is a one off then that's a different kettle of fish altogether and the lack of support doesn't bode well for their relationship to my mind.