Getting married after being together for ages

dante92

We got married last summer after being together nearly 11 years. I hasn't changed things practically, we already lived together and had a mortgage, and I didn't even change my name. But emotionally I do feel different being married, as does he, though we can't quite pinpoint why, but it feels great, and we're both so glad a) that we got married and b) that we did so when it felt right for us. We had a simple wedding, in the village church then afterwards a BBQ at a school, but we did have a lot of people there. It was fab :j

blondeprincess

I have been with OH for 10 years.

We have been engaged for 9 years & i always knew it would be a long engagement, ie 5ish years. As the years have gone by getting married has been something i have thought less & less about. We have a house, child etc & getting married has been something on the back seat & not as important.. OH has been desperate to get married for the past few years

The reason we are getting married now well 2012 is because we have been TTC for over 2 years & are now having to pay for treatment. We have had so much stress & the whole journey have been so emotional. I think IVF is going to be our best chance of falling & we need to save for this, so we have decided to get married

Take away the stress of TTC thats all i seem to think about, plan a wedding so we have something to look forward to/plan & get excited about

By the time we get married we would have been togethet 12 years nearly

vicki+1

blondeprincess wrote: »

I have been with OH for 10 years.

We have been engaged for 9 years & i always knew it would be a long engagement, ie 5ish years. As the years have gone by getting married has been something i have thought less & less about. We have a house, child etc & getting married has been something on the back seat & not as important.. OH has been desperate to get married for the past few years

The reason we are getting married now well 2012 is because we have been TTC for over 2 years & are now having to pay for treatment. We have had so much stress & the whole journey have been so emotional. I think IVF is going to be our best chance of falling & we need to save for this, so we have decided to get married

Take away the stress of TTC thats all i seem to think about, plan a wedding so we have something to look forward to/plan & get excited about

By the time we get married we would have been togethet 12 years nearly

Hope that BFP comes your way soon. i tried to organise a wedding once before in the hope that concentrating about something else would get me pregnant and it worked. This time it hasn't worked, i have been ttc no 2 for 18 months, (although i have to acknowlege its not nearly so painful as ttc no 1), So i get marrried on friday , then back to ttc again. I truley believe that everyone gets there in the end its just a more rocky journey for some than others, hang in there your miracle will come

Horace

Blue - I had some friends who were together for 30 years before they tied the knot and they only did then because they realised that should one of them die then the other wouldnt inherit. They didnt have a flash wedding and just went away quietly to get married - they were together for another 6 years until her OH passed away.

If you're not ready to be married after 8 years then wait awhile longer you never know one day you and your OH will decide that now is the time and you will either have a big fuss or have a quiet wedding.

frannyann

I have been with the OH for 8 years, and was actually very anti getting married again (but came round to his way of thinking in the end LOL), just thought we are happy as we are!! So think normal to have wobbles, as its a bit 'why try and fix somthing that isn't broken!'

kavics17

We've been together for about 7 years and we are not going to get married. He is 33, me 30. It's his decision which I respect, I understand we are not/will not be in a position when we can get married the way we want to get married (not money issue). I'm not bothered tbh, we've been together so long and happy the way we are.

angel223_2

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tamarto

angel223 wrote: »

Ive been with my OH for about 8 1/2 years and were due to marry this sept. For most of my life I was anti wedding as I didnt see the point really (its just a piece of paper attitude) but I now realise there are reasons to be married other than the fact that we love each other. one important reason for us is that OH would like to addopt my DD (she wants this too) and that cant be done unless were married He has been around since DD was 3 (now 11) so they are already like father and daughter but this would formalise things and give DD a bit more emotional security I think. We have been planning to marry for a few years and we did save some money but then baby no2 made her apperance and we needed to move to a bigger house and all that sucked up our savings and spare cash. Still we got around to it in the end were not having a big wedding its deff aimed more at close family bonding, were going away on a family holiday and will be married while there.
I am having a big wobble about loosing my name Im not sure why I just dont want to lose it and OH refuses to take my name instead (ohhhh yes it went down like a lead ballon when I brought that up)

He doesn't need to take your name for you to keep it. You've survived this long with different names.;)

tamarto

kavics17 wrote: »

We've been together for about 7 years and we are not going to get married. He is 33, me 30. It's his decision which I respect, I understand we are not/will not be in a position when we can get married the way we want to get married (not money issue). I'm not bothered tbh, we've been together so long and happy the way we are.

I can understand that, but make sure you get legalities sorted if you share a home etc, if you are not matrried you (and he) could have a real problem if something should happen to either of you otherwise.

angel223_2

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