It's STILL tough and not getting better - so how are we coping?

Rummer

Hello

I have been off the forum for a while but I need it now more than ever. My OH was made redundant and that gave us the opportunity to clear a whole load of debt but now things are starting to bite and I am getting very worried. Even though he has applied for over 70 jobs nothing has come up yet.

To be honest I have strayed off the OS path and have been eating out, having takeaways and generally living a less than frugal life and now I need to get myself together before my family ends up in serious trouble. I just don't know where to start. I have not meal planned or had stocked cupboards in months it has all gone to pieces and I feel totally overwhelmed.

Sorry to be so down beat, I know you all have more than enough troubles of your own x

penelopedee_2

Hi Rummer, don't panic.

Start by looking in the kitchen and see if you can do a week's worth of meals without going to the shops. Even a couple of days will be good. It will structure what you've got and what essentials are missing.

Then when you do need to go shopping, compile a week's meal plan first and stick to it. If possible add couple extra bits of dried or tinned stuff for the store cupboard. Keep the food interesting and tasty or you won't stick to it.

Small steps to get back in the swing of it. Good luck Pen x

parsonswife8

Rummer wrote: »

Hello

I have been off the forum for a while but I need it now more than ever. My OH was made redundant and that gave us the opportunity to clear a whole load of debt but now things are starting to bite and I am getting very worried. Even though he has applied for over 70 jobs nothing has come up yet.

To be honest I have strayed off the OS path and have been eating out, having takeaways and generally living a less than frugal life and now I need to get myself together before my family ends up in serious trouble. I just don't know where to start. I have not meal planned or had stocked cupboards in months it has all gone to pieces and I feel totally overwhelmed.

Sorry to be so down beat, I know you all have more than enough troubles of your own x

Take a deep breath and when you feel that the time is right, try and make a few lists of basic foodstuffs and household things and toiletries and then, try and stick to them when buying.

A lot of families in the UK are having to bite the bullet in the current financial climate.

Try and work out your anticipated income and try and live within this. Buy your food in cheaper shops/supermarkets.

You are certainly not alone, a lot of folk are in the same basket as you.

Good luck.:)

jediteacher

Sequeena wrote: »

I've not been here for a little while, I hope everyone is ok.

I'm currently going through another miscarriage and finding it so hard to cope

Poor you. I know just how you feel I just went through my third 2 months ago and find it very hard. If you need to chat or vent please feel free to pm me. Huge hugs.

kezlou

sequeena ((((hugs)))) to you, i had four awful miscarriages last year so i know kind of how your feeling, if you want vent/shout.scream you know where i am. My partner had a vasectomy after the fourth as we couldn't deal with it any more.

Next week is back to frugal living, found lots of free stuff on at the library and parks so that's the plan so far. This weekend has been stupidly expensive again:(.

Tomorrow is my niece's 3rd birthday so got her a jigsaw out of home bargains. So tomorrow were visiting family in the afternoon. On the morning i have to go to the bank so i'll take boys in the charity shops maybe for some jumpers.

narabanekeater

Sequeena big hugs to you. I like many other posters understand how you feel. I lost twins last year. PLease please PM me if you ever want to chat

Hubby and I went Alton Towers today (free tickets vis The Sun) we had a lovely day although I did manage to bring me breakie back up. It cost a whopping £5 to park. Hubby had a KFC which was a treat. Due to me not being allowed sugar there really wasnt anything for me to eat. I did have a cuppa but they had no sweetners. Usually I carry them round in my handbag but I left my bag at home today.
I won quite a few Thomas items on ebay today as a local pink up so have them to collect and put away for Santa
Wishing you all a wonderful week

northwest1965

gailey wrote: »

Stepson gets maintainance, extra money xmas/birthday and uniform money.
we pay petrol costs to pick im up and drop him off plus odd day out, extra food for him so cant afford to say that will come out of his pocket money.

We tried approaching subject with his mam about education, but she gets defensive and tells hubby to butt out. Hes been in anger management for last few years, seen educational pychologist and has his own social worker. He getting extra help in school and very good school but he needs to behave and make effort to improve .

His mam rang today they on health kick and she lectured us on giving him healthy food, we nearly always healthy homemade here and son hates it.

Anyway enough of stepmonster part 2.

But love fact you can get so much for money be sad when carboots end, need to step up my xmas so I feel more chilled and in control.

Could he not be made to buy it from his birthday money? He wont learn if you keep buying it for him.
Telling hubby to butt out on education? So its OK to pay the maintenance and thats it? Hubby has a right to go to school parents evening, if I was him I'd phone the school and ask them to send a copy of letters to him aswell and usually they are good and will see two parents seperatly.
Eating healthily, blimey if my OH's x phoned here and said that, she'd get a 'what happens in my house has nothing to do with you, I'm sure if you ask stepson he will tell you i bake bread and make food from scratch. I simply dont buy ready meals from Asda;).
Sorry if that was a bit too much of a rant there.

Wow you did well at the carboot, must admit I havent been to one for ages.

So sorry for eveyones' losses, havent had a miscarriage but did have an ectopic and it left me unable to conceive. Make sure you ladies grieve and look after yourself

gailey_2

Morning guys

narab sounds like great day yesterday .

well ist not even 10am and kids at each others throats
hubby still in bed stayed up late painting last night.

I have to clean baby activity station as selling to someone on netmums later.

Hubbys off out to take mil to dentist and do few chores leaving me 3 kids.
Have to do some cooking and decluttering today finally finished mountain of laundry
Might go park later dfoing tour of local parks stop them getting bored.

Northwest- ta for advice, hubby hates confrontation it really is a strained relationship.
He wasent allowed to see him for first 2years, the maintaince is private arramgement as prior to her remarrying think she was claiming single parent benefit.
His mum/stepdad work low paid so she gets tax credits for him and lives ha so cheap rent.

Hubbys names not even on birth certificate but they do look alike so never sought official paternity.

ringing explore learning centre later they have free 1st session to acess him and advise us on how best to help him as hubbys not got much patiance when 12year old cant do his 6, 7times tables.
Until hes more motivated and wants to learn he wont improve but 1weekend a month hard to make a differenece.





wondering if should have more but hubby works most weekends so that would leave me with 3kids and 4year rows with him a lot, hes got no patiance and can be really mean to her shouting and smacking ect .

I thourght she was bit cheeky too she asked what he had had to eat when hubby mentioned 1pizza she was like ah hes meant to be eating healthy not sure of its her latest fad as we eat healthy all time ses the one who still let him have sweets, pop and not brush his teeth after going into hospital and having 8teeth out so shant be listening to parenting advice from her I let it go over my head best way.

I had great time at carboot could easily have spent more need to go few more before season ends , even though just brought 1present feel better.

kezlou

Gailey that was my two yesterday, so my eldest got sent to bed. It wouldn't have so bad if my 10yr old hasn't bald faced lied to me and his father. so now he's being punished no pc for a week.

I've finished one of the door curtains:T, so going to start another one today. Determined to cut my fuel bills this year, last years were ridiculous. Oh that reminds me have to do the electric meter reading today.
Have a busy day tomorrow, market on the moring for more material, DS1 has asked me to make him some curtains for his bedroom.
Then were off to a park for some craft making and a wander.

Oh and my appointment at the hospital has been changed to this Wednesday to get my pot off:j:j can't wait, praying my knee is healed.My friends are looking after the boys, so that's a weight off my shoulders. OH think he has the h-pyro virus again , last time he had it we managed to catch it before it turned into a stomach ulcer. So we spent a small fortune on fresh juice and anti stomach acid and heartburn medication.

Right better get a wiggle on x

Prudent

Morning everyone

Goodness a lot of people going through the mill. Times are indeed tough.

Rummer - I am so sorry to hear about hubby. I just speak to so many people who can't get jobs. Its scary. Do be brave and come back here though because there is such a wealth of frugal inspiration.

gailey - hang in with step son's mum. Sounds like she is maybe feelinga bit insecure.

nara - Alton Towers sounds fun!

I have been to Poundland this morning. Having decided to do a winter box for the house and car I went to see what a could get. I bought two torches + loads of batteries. Pack of two survival blankets (for car). Church candles and some nice Indian stone circles to stand them on (this bit a luxury, but will do for meal table too). Flu stuff ( a selection).

Also found 3 packs of small clip lidded plastic boxes. Lots of people at work buy the graze boxes for snacks. I think it could be done much chepaer using these and stocking up on offers at Julian Graves. Since starting my diet I am banning unhealthy snacks from house, so going to make up these for DD. Bought 3 packs - 9 boxes, so a good start.

I then went to farmfoods for sugar @ £0.59. Had a long chat with nice lady behind counter who was giving me lots of examples of how fast their food prices are rising. She said a lot of £1 items are going up to £1.29 - a 29% increase. Quite worrying. Also bought some salt for winter steps and paths too.

I am taking DD into primark after lunch to see if their winter PJs and warm socks etc have come in yet. It certainly cold enough in Scotland!