Flatmates spending money I don't have...

minicooper272

I've just moved flat to live with a group of friends who I thought were all generally quite careful with money. since moving, my flatmates have all gone rather spend crazy in buying things for the flat (some of which are really unnecessary). They all see something for sale and divide it by the number of flatmates and justify that it isn't a lot per person, but it's mounting up and it's starting to really seriously worry me!

I've tried to say this to them but every time I raise it I get treated like I'm being really unreasonable and tight fisted. For example, the other day one flatmate went out and bought something for £18 that I know how to make for free. When I tried to tell them, they justified that it was only a few quid per flatmate and that that's pocket money. Atm, I owe at least one flatmate £35 which is more than I have to spend on food in a month and it's all gone on stuff I didn't ask for and that we never really needed in the first place!

I don't know what else to do!!! Please give me advice!

Oldernotwiser

Call a flat meeting to discuss this and to come to an agreement about things.

Lokolo

Tell them you can't afford it and you don't mind not using the items (if possible) but you won't give them any money back as you don't have any to give.

robin_banks

minicooper272 wrote: »

I've just moved flat to live with a group of friends who I thought were all generally quite careful with money. since moving, my flatmates have all gone rather spend crazy in buying things for the flat (some of which are really unnecessary). They all see something for sale and divide it by the number of flatmates and justify that it isn't a lot per person, but it's mounting up and it's starting to really seriously worry me!

I've tried to say this to them but every time I raise it I get treated like I'm being really unreasonable and tight fisted. For example, the other day one flatmate went out and bought something for £18 that I know how to make for free. When I tried to tell them, they justified that it was only a few quid per flatmate and that that's pocket money. Atm, I owe at least one flatmate £35 which is more than I have to spend on food in a month and it's all gone on stuff I didn't ask for and that we never really needed in the first place!

I don't know what else to do!!! Please give me advice!

When they move out who gets what?.

You're in no way being unreasonable as you haven't agreed to buy them.

Chris4

Just say you can't afford it and don't give them the money for it. Say you won't use it. Don't let them bully you into giving them the money for something you're not going to use.

GEEGEE8

How awkward for you, and how presumptious of them!

savemoney

I cant help but wonder what else is in store hope you got money aside for utility bills

if it was me and the items weren't essential ie tv, fridge etc then if folks want this item then let them buy it

I think you all need to prioritize what is actually needed

pretzelnut

Id tell them to take a running jump, any money spent by you all should be a joint decision BEFORE a purchase is made, and a budgetsetthateveryone agrees to and not a penny more.

Sit them all down and express how you feel, you might find another faltmate who feels the same, they cant have it if you refuse to give it, your life might be a little uncomfortable if they decided to take the hump but that will be easier to live with than whats happening now.

Some people just have a selfish attitude, you need to nip this in the butt now, it could get a lot worse as once the advantage is taken they will continue to take advantage.

minicooper272

I have raised the issue and I asked that in future could they all please run it by me before they spend my money for me...
The next day I came in to find that one of the ones I had spoken to had then gone out to spend £15 on special bins for recycling. I'm fine with recycling but we have lots of post moving boxes lying around that would have worked just as well...

I don't want to get into all the silly ins and outs but we moved in last week and it's been constant things - they want to get taxi's rather than walk half a mile (I tell them I'll catch up with them the other end and walk it), we've got brand name products toppelling out of the cupboards and every time I find something new it has me near tears.

I've been thinking about saying I refuse to pay for it but we've only just moved in and I don't want to create a tense atmosphere...

Mojisola

minicooper272 wrote: »

I have raised the issue and I asked that in future could they all please run it by me before they spend my money for me...
The next day I came in to find that one of the ones I had spoken to had then gone out to spend £15 on special bins for recycling. I'm fine with recycling but we have lots of post moving boxes lying around that would have worked just as well...

I don't want to get into all the silly ins and outs but we moved in last week and it's been constant things - they want to get taxi's rather than walk half a mile (I tell them I'll catch up with them the other end and walk it), we've got brand name products toppelling out of the cupboards and every time I find something new it has me near tears.

I've been thinking about saying I refuse to pay for it but we've only just moved in and I don't want to create a tense atmosphere...

It's a very difficult situation. Are they people with more available money than you or don't they have any money sense?

If you can't get them to see your point of view, you're going to have to choose between upsetting them or getting into a lot of debt.

I think you'll have to keep going with the same line - if I didn't agree to buy it, I'm not giving anyone any money.

flashnazia

I really feel for you as I know exactly where you are coming from.

The trouble is, they will see you as mean-spirited/uncharitable whatever you say or do.

You do have to be firm and not give them the money.

But they won't change. My belief (when it comes to money) is that there are two types: those that can't stand having money clutter up their pockets and have to spend it and those that are more sensible and don't waste money (mostly on rubbish).

The latter are in the minority and will never be accepted by the majority.

Don't mean to be negative but I don't think u can continue to live with this lot (from what you have said - especially if they are continuing to spend your money without you permission and have left you in tears)