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Rehoming another cat. Advice needed please.

in Pets & pet care
5 replies 691 views
I posted a message when my lovely cat Tinker passed away. First post here.

It is now 4 weeks since I lost Tinker. I still miss her dreadfully. But my other cat Ebby misses her also. Whenever I am out of her sight the poor thing yowls and yowls. I have seen an advert asking for a home for a male indoor cat aged a year and a half. Do you think it would work if I adopted him? Ebby has only ever had Tinker in her life. Would she accept another cat in Tinkers place? I know she would prob resent it at first. I'm not expecting them to be best friends from the start. Would she eventaually accept him? Would it even be fair to Ebby to bring another cat into the house with Ebby being an old girl? To be honest I don't know what to do. Ebby isn't happy on her own. Yet when Tinker passed I spoke to a cat therapist and he said Ebby isn't wanted another cat. It's Tinker she's mourning. Any advice appreciated. Thanks.



  • SnowyOwl_2SnowyOwl_2 Forumite
    5.3K Posts
    IMO there is no definitive answer to this - anybody who claims to "know" exactly what you should do is simply expressing their opinion.

    I think you should do what you think is right. You have found a kitty who needs a home, and you have a home available. The maths definitely works.

    I used to have two cats, Oscar and Tabitha both now deceased who came to me as a pair when they were seven years old and they were inseparable. A couple of months before I moved house a little black stray cat started coming in and stealing food - he was starving, pathetic etc etc. He had no microchip or collar, but I got him calmed down and he came too when I moved and I called him Henry. Oscar and Henry didn't like each other, and Oscar asserted his authority over Henry. Tabitha wasn't interested in Henry. Unfortunately poor Oscar got killed on the road a few months after moving house. Tabitha sat with her face in the corner and didn't eat for three days. After that she started to come round and be herself again. Also Henry's character started to come out, and he and Tabitha fell in love and they became inseparable until they both died of kidney disease seven years later.

    So it's possible that an older cat who was once one of a couple will accept a new boy. My personal opinion is that you should go ahead and give this new boy a loving home, and give Ebby a chance to make a new kitty friend to see out her days with.
  • if you were going to go for it (i would) i would keep youngest in a separate room to my resident cat for a few days they will know eachother is there they will smell eachother, then slowly introduce them so the get to see eachother but will not be able to get at eachother and bui;d up slowly till they are both compfy with each other.
  • paulwfpaulwf Forumite
    3.3K Posts
    If you explain the situation to a sanctuary they should be happy to arrange a foster situation where you take the new cat home and can return it if it doesn't work out. Obviously returning a cat won't be easy but having the option will give you more confidence to adopt another cat.

    Most cat sanctuaries are full to bursting so adopting another cat is a great thing to do. At one time we were down to just one cat - Charley - and now we are up to 4 and Charley has accepted the rest. Cat relationships can be complicated at times and there is some growling and hissing in the first week of a new arrival but generally they all get along well.
  • spike7451spike7451 Forumite
    6.9K Posts
    Pauls' right on this.I originally got Christmas,the most beautiful,sadly deaf,white cat with one blue & one green eye.Sadly I had to return her to the ASSISI the next day as she was wrecking my home.(I was taking shelves off the bedroom walls at 0530 in the morning!)
    I left there with Daisy who was about 2 1/2 when I got her.The ASSISI have no problem homing kittens but are full to bursting with older cats,often overlooked because they are'nt as cute as a kitten.

    Couple of interesting reads here:,4929.0.html,4799.0.html
  • I'm so sorry - it's hard dealing with your grief and also (clearly) that of your poor cat, sad and confused as to where her companion is....

    We've been a multi-cat household since 1988 and sadly, we've had five losses over the years. We've never had fewer than two cats, though, so not had to cope with just one cat unused to being an 'only child'. It must feel horrible for them. Yes, I'm sure she is missing Tinker terribly. To adopt an adult cat is a lovely idea, and I really, really hope Ebby will adjust and welcome a new arrival. We've only introduced kittens or youngsters less than six months, which has been relatively straightforward.

    Go and see this possible adoptee and judge his temperament. I think you might have a better chance of Ebby being more accepting of a young male than a young female. Female cats can be more territorial (bizarre, I know) than males. If he's your (fairly typical in our house!!) big, soppy, neutered, mummy's boy, then the chances are even better he'll fit in.
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