Option to be posted to Cypus - what should we do?

Rosebud24

Hi all,

My boyfriend has just been offered a posting in Cyprus. It would start in January 2011 but he has been asked to give an answer tomorrow and has asked me what I think... yikes! It is a bit out of the blue. He is going to ask if he can give an answer on Monday (30th May) instead as I don't know what to say!

I have read some of the other threads on this forum re. Cyprus, which have been helpful - thanks to all who contributed. :T

I still have a couple of questions, mainly 'what's it like?'. We think we would be based in Dhekelia. We are unmarried at the moment but will be married by then so would have a quarter. We don't have any children. I have read lots of practical information but not much about what day to day life is like.


My current concerns are work, family and finances:

• My concern about work is that I would ideally like to work over there. Are there many jobs available?
• My concern about family is that I obviously won't get to see my sister/dad as much. Is internet connection for Skype good in Cyprus? Are there ever cheap flights available?
• My concern about finances is that my income will either become non-existant or will likely decrease. Does anyone know what the LOA will be? My boyf is an Army Captain.
• I am also worried about effect on my employability/career when we return to UK but I think I will have to figure that one out for myself!

Also, is there a social scene for childless 'WAGS'. I have friends amongst the wifes where we are currently but find the social opportunites outside of child-based ones are limited. I have nothing against children but it would obviously be weird if I was hanging around at the school gates!

Sorry for the long post everyone but I am really worried and would really, really appreciate any advice anyone can offer! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Alias_Omega

You will struggle to get paid work in Cyprus, lots of cash for living over here & internet is good for skype. Flights differ in price, jet2 & easyjet are not as cheap during summer months, but winter time are good if you like being boxed in for 5 hrs.

Do it..

13Kent

Life out here is great. Weather lovely, many jobs start at 7am and finish by about half one, so lots of free time.

Not sure how much LOA you would get. Jobs can be limited as many jobs are earmarked for local people, but there are some available.

As for the social scene as with anywhere the opportunities are there, it just depends on you wanting to join in. We are not in Dhekelia, but our community is great, lots of social things both for families and couples, easy to make friends, and everyone is very supportive.

There are lots of chances to do new things here. such as water sports scuba diving, kite surfing, jet ski, water ski, some people own boats. Also there are often good deals at local hotels -especially over winter -great if they have a spa too. It's great being able to explore the island, going up to the North is lovely. Lots of people travel to Egypt or DUbai for short breaks!

We keep in contact with webcams and telephone via skype - it's relatively cheap and easy.

I would say its a great opportunity. For us it will be nice to look back on forces life and remember that we had an adventure living in a foreign country (albeit the easy way, living in a British community with plenty of support) rather spending our whole life doing the rounds of UK bases which have similar jobs and lifestyle.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Rosebud24

Thanks for your replies, it's really useful to talk it over (albeit virtual talking!).

Do many people rent private accommodation whilst over there? And is it expensive? I ask because, whilst I mentioned in my OP that we would be married by then (for simplicity), that would actually mean getting married sooner than planned! So now I'm mulling over whether it would be veasible to wait and just rent someone over there rather than getting a MQ. Would there be any other ramifications of not being married?

Thanks again for your advice.

1012donna

I'd imagine that if you weren't married you wouldn't be entitled to medical/dental care and his LOA may be less as a single person rather than a married one too.

BLT_2

Rosebud24 wrote: »

Thanks for your replies, it's really useful to talk it over (albeit virtual talking!).

Do many people rent private accommodation whilst over there? And is it expensive? I ask because, whilst I mentioned in my OP that we would be married by then (for simplicity), that would actually mean getting married sooner than planned! So now I'm mulling over whether it would be veasible to wait and just rent someone over there rather than getting a MQ. Would there be any other ramifications of not being married?

Thanks again for your advice.

I have no idea what rank your boyfriend is so cannot comment on the financial affordability however;

Private rental would be far in excess of MQ, which are set at a standard rate, you would get a 2 bedroom place which would probably set you back around 100 pounds a month, I imagine private rental would be at least 4 to 5 times that. Your boyfriend would also need permission to live out of barracks, which is not necessarily a fait accompli. If this was not granted then he would paying both rent for your flat and also rent for his in barracks accommodation. I seriously doubt the affordability of all of this on a single wage in particular given that he would only recieve the single personal overseas allowance, which is far less than the married element.

You would have no entitlement to medical or dental treatment through the service facilities.

Your chances of finding a job, as others have stated, are pretty low given the vast amount of bored housewives over there looking for work having found out that laying on the beach all day is not all it is cut out to be.

Financially being married is going to be far more beneficial than going across as a single person.

Sarsie

I married a soldier because he was about to get posted.

I may have divorced him three years later but I do not regret taking that chance at all and I haven't even bothered to stop using my married name. OK so it turned out that we were not meant to be together forever but then if you risk nothing in life you gain nothing.

Think sensibly about what is the worst that can happen in quantifiable terms? Your carer might be influenced isn't quantifiable, it's subjective as some employers also like a bit of broadmindedness. In quantifiable terms from where I' looking the worst is you'll hate Dhekalia. If tht happens you can put in a case for a surplus married quarter (SSFA) nearer to your family back in Britain. I did that and got a quarter at the second nearest base (the nearest had no surplus) to where I come from. It wasn't difficult I just had to write a good reason why I needed to be nearer home.

The moving costs are not paid to or from a suplus quarter, that is something to bear in mind, and your tennacy gives them 28 days notice not 92 but in reality if you get good advice then you'll tend to hold your quarter as long as you genuinely need it, suplus or not.

Only you can decideif you're going to go for it or not. My Nan used to say it's the things in life you didn't do that you regret more than the things you did. I tend to think she was right.

If there's something really holding you back, like a sick relative who needs you day to day or a degree course with a year left to run or something then Ok, but a lot of the time what hold us back is just fear of the unknown.

Loads of British army wives are living in the sun right now and we all start out childless (well ok nearly all), it's not totally out-there like moving to the moon. Have a good think about it, if you find your objections are watertight then Ok they're watertight... Otherwise are they really just fear of making the first leap?

I lived on bases for five years in total (I kept my quater two years after entitlement- but that was exceptional generosity on the part of Defence Estates and only because I was seriously ill). Something I noticed was that the partners who tried to hold thier soldier/sailor/airman back found thier relationships soured quickly. It's nice to think he loves you more than anything on Earth, but I saw quite a few test that and find it didn't hold as firm as they thought. Service personal may love you yes, but to them the demands of the job are a lifestyle, a brotherhood, a career, a mindset... It runs very deep for many. So if you want this chap then maybe you have to factor into that decision that he needs you to be flexible to the demands upon him, he wont be given a lot of choice about his life and often even when it appears he has a choice he doesn't really.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you are inflexible at all, just giving you the benefit of another perspective to consider and to adopt or disregard as you feel best.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

mummyfleming

All I have to say is go for it. You dont want to spend your life thinking 'what if?'. Im sure it will all work out. But at the end of the day, we can all say yes or no, its up to you and your partner. Good luck with whatever you choose and if you end up in Episkopi, i'll see you around

jpwhittle

i moved out here with my husband on tuesday and i love it, some people say its because im in holiday mode but john was in work most of last week so i pretty much know im here with his work, but the whole experiance is fantastic, my kids have more freedom and theres always something going on. Id recomend giving it a go, at least youll have tried it, if he doesnt like it you can leave in 18months but were else do you get this oppurtunity? now looking forward to christmas in the sun. I'm up the road from you at ay nik but went to dhek yesterday and it looks nice, houses have views out over the sea.

BLT_2

jpwhittle wrote: »

i moved out here with my husband on tuesday and i love it, some people say its because im in holiday mode but john was in work most of last week so i pretty much know im here with his work, but the whole experiance is fantastic, my kids have more freedom and theres always something going on. Id recomend giving it a go, at least youll have tried it, if he doesnt like it you can leave in 18months but were else do you get this oppurtunity? now looking forward to christmas in the sun. I'm up the road from you at ay nik but went to dhek yesterday and it looks nice, houses have views out over the sea.

Although I agree that the OP shouldn't miss out on an opportunity like this there is a difference between a young women who has just got married and whose husband will be at work all day and one who has a couple of children to look after.

As you say, you have been there for 6 days, I would be interested to hear the views of someone who has been there for 12 months.

13Kent

We've been out here a while and we love it.

We do miss some things - family and friends, cheap shopping with lots of choice, internet grocery shopping and delivery, Sky+, BUT we have great weather, a pool 2 mins up the road, children that can swim before they start school, and have great weather to play out all the time, afternoons together as a family, beaches really close, days out at the waterparks, cheap deals at holiday hotels.

Both us and the children have a great social life. It might not suit everyone but we like it, and before we moved out here were were apprehensive, but didn't hear a bad work about the place from anyone who had been out here before we moved.

Go for it!!