I have done nothing yet but writting here is the only way that will make me do stg...

beanielou

Baby steps, baby steps

Want_to_be_free

jo1972 wrote: »

Lol she doesn't have a machine either :rotfl:

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Well , maybe try freecycle http://www.freecycle.org/display.php?region=United%20Kingdom

or Freegle http://www.ilovefreegle.org/

Long shot with Washing Machine but not impossible to get a decent one , and tumble driers are always on the go...You can send a *Wanted* message and hope someone might offer you one .

I picked up a microwave today. I am so happy because I really didn't have money to buy a new one (min £50/ £60) I put 'Microwave wanted' add to both Freegle and Freecycle yesterday. Two people offered me their absolutely good working order but surplus to their needs microwaves.. I got what I need Free, I like free

Want_to_be_free

ViolaLass wrote: »

Just a thought, but it might be worth considering whether you can really afford to give your son an expensive day for his birthday, a trip to Alton Towers, a summer holiday AND visit your parents. Are they all really necessary?

You could spend the day together and do something far cheaper than Alton Towers and it is also possible to have a holiday for a lot less than £200, especially if you stay close to home.

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What can I say, you are right
Maybe I shall not give my son all those but I promised once…The issue is with his ASD, I have to be an example and keep all my promises otherwise he gets out off track.

I already reduced my monthly spending on the paper , I will get paid on 28th May and will enter every spend to my spent diary and try to cut back even more then what I put into my reduced budget plan.

However I haven’t work out how I can reduce all these extra spending requiring me to find additional £3528. I will do look into it today.

One thing I can reduce but cannot get rid is visiting my parents and it is not even this August, it is in 2011 – I have to plan this. I haven’t seen my mum since Jan this year, by the time I get the money together it will be 18 months. I miss my parents- I can live with bread and butter if necessary but I must see my parents. Unfortunately they cannot come because my mum is looking after my nana; we did not put her into a house even though she is 90 odd and has early stages of Alzheimer. Obviously it is not only me but my son as well, I have no where to leave him when I go and see my parents, and I wouldn’t want to go without him anyway.

horsechestnut

Just a few suggestions.
Look at the "old style" thread for general money saving tips. e.g. Using Stardrops will reduce your cleaning budget (see stardrops thread) You don't have to use all of them, but just a few will make a big diference to the amount you need for general housekeeping.
Is there a Lidl or Aldi near you. I notice that you live in the South East; Have the Home Bargains shops come that far south yet?
For the cinema; have you tried Orange Wednesday? Again, see the thread.
Hairdressers; Do you have a local college that offers hairdressing? It is a fraction of the price. Or can you do your own colour and just go for the cut & blow?
When it is time to renew your car and household insurance, follow Martin's tips and don't forget to go through a cash-back site .e.g. Quidco.
Check for vouchers for Alton Towers etc. Sometimes you can get 2 for 1 entry.

rainbow81

Hi there

Sorry to hear about your situation but congratulations on getting up the courage to face up to what's going on.

I too am a single mum of a child with ASD and I just wondered if you have applied for Disability Living Allowance for your son? It is a recognised disability and as such you will be working harder to provide him with a "normal" as upbringing as possible. I know you don't like the thought of benefits but since my son has got it we have been able to do so many more things.

Also, if you have you son's diagnosis letter I think you can get into places like Alton Towers at a discounted rate and you get a band so you can jump the queues. We went to Chessington for the price of one adult, and with little waiting my son coped very well.

Just something to think about. I know it is tough bringing up a child with ASD and I have too been in the situation with a bf where they just seem to leech money. With so much stress it is hard to see clearly.

Best of luck with your journey.
R x

moo2moo

Want_to_be_free wrote: »

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Moo2moo, so far you sent me very sensible messages, I cannot imagine how people can live with £4 K per year but I guess if you must then you have to find a way.

I feel like silly brat making much ado about nothing when I think about other people who are far more misfortunate

Your message made me think very hard, I thank you for it.



I am going to read the 'frugal living tonight',
I also already booked a meeting with local CAB in order get total benefit check.

I have very very long way to go.

In 2010-2011, the full basic State Pension for a single person is £97.65 a week. £5078 a year. Assuming that the silver surfers pay the same broadband and tv licence fees as the rest of us thats £600. Assuming £40 a week for food, cleaning materials and clothing thats £2080 which leaves £2398 to cover insurance, transport, heating, lighting and everything else. Makes you think.


Incidentally having thought very briefly about it Flying Fresian (another regular poster) and I embarked upon a mini challenge of our own to figure out just how the heck this was done. Although cheating quite considerably we allocated ourselves £4K to cover the three month period from September to December last year and then realised it was actually four months. Unsurprisingly I failed spectacularly. As a paperwork excercise I learnt a lot from it. Mostly that a family of four cannot possibly get through life on £1000 a month in the run up to christmas with the increasingly regular demands from school and a hefty petrol bill each month.

Want_to_be_free

I just sold a TV which was gathering dust in my son's room.
I put the TV add to Gumtree yesterday, TV is gone today. Such a brilliant result. I am so happy.

My profit is £25, I am well happy.:j:beer:

I said profit, because initially this TV was given to us free about 3 months ago. He did not turn this TV on not even once, again it is the same old thing -TV was second hand, not new. I am not so sure how to break new vs second hand struggle with him but he needs to learn somehow. Anyone out there who has a kid with ASD and having similar issues?

Anyway, £25 is great but now need to decide what am I going to do with it? Pay against debt vs put it towards additional money requirement.:cool:


Now there is a printer to be sold

Everyone who sent me a message, thank you all and I really appreciate your posts.
I am going to reply all the posts but I am trying to sort out my garage right now to see what else I can sell.:D

Want_to_be_free

....another £30 from the sale of printer :j:j

Now I have £55 to pay towards something... Still not decided. What do you guys suggest?

beanielou

Keep it for your shortfall
Well done you

jtr2803

Hello!

Ok while reading your posts I have come up with some ideas - let's see how many I can remember or I will have to keep coming back and adding posts :rotfl:

First of all - you are an AMAZING person and never, ever lose sight of that, even in your darkest moments. Unfortunately this world doesn't seem to reward people who have kindness in their hearts, if that was the case I am sure you would be very well off. Some of the things you have written about could have been extracts of various situations in my life (or my mums - no offence intended regarding age ) with regards to partners not being who you thought they were. We also don't talk to many people in our family so similarities there as well.

Nothing is going to be sorted overnight, Rome wasn't built in a day and all that and you have to look after yourself and make sure you are happy and well to the best of your ability before you can take on your creditors. The best bit of advice is to speak to CCCS or Payplan or similar (which you will be doing), I struggled on my own for some months before I went to Payplan and just not having to phone the bank and credit card companies made life so much more bearable. They will obviously also factor in clothes, haircuts etc so you might still be able to manage to fit all these in.

Some suggestions I came up with:

Cinema trips - Are you or anyone you know on Orange? could you take part in Orange Wednesdays to make it cheaper?

Car Service - my normal services cost £99 from a national chain, could you try and get it cheaper elsewhere or use an independant garage?

For your laptop - check Ebay for sure, if you do a bit of online research to find out what you need this is where you are bound to find a bargain.

Do the daily scratchcard - not sure if you have heard about this but I can PM you the details. It might only be 10p a day but with the extra card on Sunday it's £45 a year for minimal effort.

DLA - Agree with Rainbow, I don't have hands on experience with Aspergers but our company owns a residential home for adults of all ages with Aspergers/Autism and they were all in receipt of DLA to assist with travel costs. Don't ever be afraid to take benefits, for every person like you there are 500 who aren't entitled but wouldn't feel bad about trying to claim it. Sorry to be blunt but you NEED help at the moment so TAKE any you can!

Try a different vets for the cat, it wont hurt to make a call or two and find out.

Your TV/Broadband etc - who are you with? We are with Sky and I pay £41 for best broadband they do, landline and basic sky package with the Kids and Discovery channels etc - call them and explain your situation, they might be able to lower something, even if it's only a pound or two a month.

Mobile - again who are you with, is this contract? When did it start? Some companies will allow you to down tariff, especially with exceptional circumstances, hun if you don't ask you wont get! I pay £20 a month for a brand new touch screen phone with 500 texts, 600 minutes and unlimited internet, I can also use a flexible booster so could have unlimited texts or calls if I wanted to - so you should be able to find a tariff that is cheaper but with enough benefits to suit.

As for the money you say you owe to a friend - this has to take priority if they need it back,I may be wrong but I don't think that debt could be part of any formal payment agreement like a DMP/IVA so it's best to put the sales profit towards that for now, it also shows you are trying to pay it back.

Phew - I am sure I can come up with more but I hope the above can help in some way and I'll stick around to see you through