Married for £1k?

ab7167

Was hoping for some advice - is it possible to get married on a budget of £1k?I would ideally like to have about 40 guests, but have no idea how much anything costs or what options we have. All my friends has very lavish do's, but we simply don't have that kind of money (and wouldn't want that kind of do even if we did!)

but all the weddings I have been to were traditional dos, am looking for ideas of alternatives.

Basically I love OH to bits and want to be married to him, would love it even if it were just the 2 of us and our 2 children, but family pressure to have a do?

bungle82

ab7167 wrote: »

Basically I love OH to bits and want to be married to him, would love it even if it were just the 2 of us and our 2 children, but family pressure to have a do?

I would say go for the wedding you want which sounds like just you, OH and your children!

Me and my husband got married in January up in Gretna and it was just us - no family. We'd been together 12 years and neither of us like a fuss so we resisted the family pressure and just went up to Scotland on our own, got married and then told our families!

Some family members were a little upset initially but they saw that it wasn't about excluding them but more about having a day that was what we wanted, and also saw what we got married for wanting to get married's sake and not the sake of having a big flashy wedding to brag about and pay for for the next 5 years.

So I say go for it! We had a lovely day that was intimate and special and we wouldn't change it for the world :-)

ab7167

Am very tempted, but my mum keeps going on about having my 2 sisters as bridesmaids. Wouldn't a cheap do not really be a bridesmaid kind of do anyway? plus they are both broke so I would have to buy everything like dresses etc for them, which I simply don't want to do. Love them both to bits, but it's just not me!

floss2

ab7167 wrote: »

Was hoping for some advice - is it possible to get married on a budget of £1k?I would ideally like to have about 40 guests, but have no idea how much anything costs or what options we have. All my friends has very lavish do's, but we simply don't have that kind of money (and wouldn't want that kind of do even if we did!)....

.... would love it even if it were just the 2 of us and our 2 children, but family pressure to have a do?

ab7167 wrote: »

Am very tempted, but my mum keeps going on about having my 2 sisters as bridesmaids. Wouldn't a cheap do not really be a bridesmaid kind of do anyway? plus they are both broke so I would have to buy everything like dresses etc for them, which I simply don't want to do. Love them both to bits, but it's just not me!

Does your mum realise that you do not want or have the money for a bigger wedding? If she is pushing for that, is she going to pay?

Sammy85_2

First question... Church, Venue or Registry Office Wedding? Important as Church and Venue weddings could quite easily blow half your budget on the ceremony alone.

Secondly.. do you want a sit down meal or buffet for the reception? A pub meal may be £10pp, a sit down meal at a hotel could range from £25-45pp and a buffet could be £5-10pp.

If you want bridemaids then have them buy their own dresses or have your mum pay for it.. same for the best man & ushers. You dont have to have any of these of course, but if you do want them then have them buy their own.

Our bestman and ushers are wearing their own black suits and i am providing a matching tie for each of them, purely because my OH is wearing uniform, so no need for them all to wear traditional wedding suits.

You can do your own bouquets and other bits and bobs yourself for a fraction of the cost.

I would say if you had a registry office wedding and a nice pub meal afterwards you could easily do it for £1000.

blabberwort

I cant remember how much we spent but it definently under £1000.

We got married at our local registry so just the cost of new outfits and a small bouquet plus registry fees.

After the wedding we headed to my relatives pub (though any local will do and im sure be happy for a group of people to turn up. May be polite to double check though that they dont mind 40 people descending on them lol) we got lucky and our relative kindly paid for the initial toast though if your having an evening do theres no reason you need a toast in the daytime.

I then went back to my aunts to help with preparing the buffet. I guess I could have left them to do this themselves but I didnt think it was fair. We took the food to our local working mans club where we hired the room and a disco.

I know it's not the ideal wedding for some people but when your on a budget then needs must.

By hiring a room in a club or something that allows you to take your own food and has a bar can save you a ton of money. Just maybe have a glass of wine or champagne ready for the toast, after that everyone buys their own drinks.

I would recommend small token gifts for anyone who has helped you though, plus your inlaws and witnesses. It doesnt have to be much as it should be accepted that it's the thought that counts.

ab7167

I think she thinKs that as I am the only sister likely to be getting married soon, it would be nice to have a big do. No, I can't see her paying - OH and I are actually pretty well off - but she doesn't see that this is because we are very MSE, not in spite of it!

blabberwort

Dont be pushed into anything, this is supposed to be your day and you should do whats right for you. If your mum isnt prepared to help financially then I dont see why you should pay for the wedding she wants and not the one you want.

If you wanted to compromise you could maybe have a registry office wedding and your 2 sisters as witnesses with no other friends or family bar immediate such as your mum and mil etc. Then have an evening do somewhere for everyone you didnt invite to the actual wedding. Theres no reason you couldnt have a great evening do even with maybe a sit down meal for less than £1000. That way you get the intimate wedding you want and your mum gets to show you off in the evening.

ab7167

Ok, registry office is fine, and our local one will look lovely on photos, it's a nice old building. Is it ok to ask people to do things for you instead of buying a present? We don't need much, so OH's cousin to take photos, MIL to make cake, that kind of thing? There are a couple of nice pubs around us as well, and now I think of it, 2 of them have rooms for hire as well. Will investigate further :-)

blabberwort

My father in law took photos on our day as he's very into photography. I think he was really pleased at being asked. My nans friend made our wedding cake for just the cost of the ingredients for my nan. Even better if you know your MIL can make a decent cake. I find people are usually happy to help, and actually feel they are contributing more to making your day enjoyable rather than buying gifts you may not want/need.

hoxtonbabe

blabberwort wrote: »

Dont be pushed into anything, this is supposed to be your day and you should do whats right for you. If your mum isnt prepared to help financially then I dont see why you should pay for the wedding she wants and not the one you want.

If you wanted to compromise you could maybe have a registry office wedding and your 2 sisters as witnesses with no other friends or family bar immediate such as your mum and mil etc. Then have an evening do somewhere for everyone you didnt invite to the actual wedding. Theres no reason you couldnt have a great evening do even with maybe a sit down meal for less than £1000. That way you get the intimate wedding you want and your mum gets to show you off in the evening.

Ahhhh, the joys of mothers! My mum would be the same as she too knows I wil be the only daughter likely to get married soon, my other 2 sisters have no interest, lol

I agree with Blabberwort, if possible try and do some kind of compromise that YOU feel comfortable with, but try not to stress over it too much and remember its your day, families have a tendency to forget that