Help... What do we do....

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

KeaneFan10 wrote: »

By answering what they can 'Have' no one is being judgmental just truthful !

As 2 board moderator's have had to step in already & warn people to be nice then that is obviously not the case.

Amistoso_2

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

I think what they mean by on topic is to trying to answer the op's question more than being judgemental & commenting on their lifestyle.

I don't begrudge anyone benefits that are really in need, but to purposely put yourself in that situation with 1 child let alone 8 is damn irresponsible!!
and sorry I would go as far as to say selfish.

perhaps he should have looked for another job before packing in his current one
The world doesn't owe you a living because you have 8 children, your supposed to work hard and be proud to provide, at least that was what I was brought up to believe.
As I said, I don't begrudge people who are in a situation through no fault of their own but he surely doesn't hold his family in very high regard to put them in this situation.
If that makes me judgemental then that's what I am ...

Amistoso_2

The worlds gone mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AnxiousMum

Amistoso - the OP is pregnant, has had extra children placed in her care, one of whom is special needs. Do you think that just possibly, it has become too much for her to handle on her own - particulary during those very very tiring and exhausting first months of pregnancy. She hadn't gone into this realising she would have her husband's children placed in her care as well.

Wouldnt hindsight be a wonderful thing for all of us - I would much rather this woman get the help she needs than the benefit scrounging neighbour we had - who has children in order to generate income as he hasn't worked in years (well legally anyways!) - and whose partner wouldn't know how to spell the word employment let alone get into it! I now know why they stopped at five kids......doesn't add to his income!

Would you have more respect for her if she turned down the home to her husband's children and they were in foster care?

KeaneFan10

if it was so hard why would you still continue too keep having children ?

AnxiousMum

Keanefan - we don't have all the intimate details of the OP's situation - she's simply asked a question and people have jumped on the high horse assuming all the negative stuff about her. I've just opened the door to assuming that there may be other factors here as well - and I dont' really know the timeframe of kids coming to live with her, getting pregnant etc.......do you? Geesh.....maybe she was on the pill and had the flu.....got pregnant....that's how my first child came about!

Just know I wouldn't want to be in her position....

But......remember to air your views on polling day when you place your votes

dmg24

AnxiousMum wrote: »

But......remember to air your views on polling day when you place your votes

I don't think there is a 'Limit the number of children a person can have' Party ... at least, not in this country!

nottslass_2

Kimitatsu wrote: »

Can I remind everyone here that we are not here to judge anyone elses situation nor is it anybody elses business but their own what benefits they are already in receipt of - but I would point out that tax credits are capped at 5 children to those who wish to comment.......

Lucy if your husband has quit his job so that he can look for work closer to home because of your eldest then you need to appeal any sanction from JCP and get someone to help you to do that. He MAY be sanctioned for up to 26 weeks as he has voluntarily left his position but if it can be shown that he was under undue stress and family concerns support this because he was working so far away then they may not impose the entire sanction.

Has he been looking for jobs closer to home? If he can show evidence of this too then more power to your case. I would definitely go to the CAB and ask to speak to a specialist benefits adviser who will be able to put your case for you - it always seems to get done faster if there is a statutory organisation working on your behalf. Even if they do impose a sanction there are hardship payments which can be claimed so you would not be entirely without money.

Otherwise go to www.entitledto.co.uk and that will give you an idea of what benefits you may be able to claim.

Now all please be nice or I will lock this thread

Since When has Tax credits been capped at 5 children ? I cannot find any official TC credits guidance that confirms this fact - Entitled to gives you the option or entering the details of up to 10 children,so would be very surprised if this was the case.

Amistoso_2

sorry didn't realise you deserved a medal for looking after your own children, is it just me or is it people who are on benefit who seem to hate other people having an opinion on the subject?!?

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

Amistoso wrote: »

I don't begrudge anyone benefits that are really in need, but to purposely put yourself in that situation with 1 child let alone 8 is damn irresponsible!!
and sorry I would go as far as to say selfish.

perhaps he should have looked for another job before packing in his current one
The world doesn't owe you a living because you have 8 children, your supposed to work hard and be proud to provide, at least that was what I was brought up to believe.
As I said, I don't begrudge people who are in a situation through no fault of their own but he surely doesn't hold his family in very high regard to put them in this situation.
If that makes me judgemental then that's what I am ...

Maybe the woman is depressed/struggling to cope with 7 kids, 1 of whom is autistic (i know I would) she is pregnant after all.

Maybe the husband is depressed at not seeing his kids. worried about his wife etc.

We don't know everything about their life to be able to judge, the wife never said that he didn't want to work only that he didn't want to work so far from home.

Probably they are now panicing & wondering how they will survive whilst he looks for a new job.

Again we don't know so I think it's unfair to judge (my opinion).