Feel like I'm trapped - don't know what to do!!

rcoo80

Hi

I would be grateful of some advice please.

I'm planning on relocating to be closer to my family so I need to leave my current job. But I feel like I can't as my department is very small with a heavy workload and we are very short staffed. We are a team of 4, myself, my manager and two others. But the two others have just handed their notices in!! Which means if I leave as well there will be no staff!! So I feel like I have a moral obligation to stay even though I dont want to. My manager is very stressed with the situation so I'm scared about telling her I'm leaving. I have an interview lined up next week so I need say something to my manager soon but I dont no what to say. I would feel so guilty to leave my manager with no staff but I want to leave and my contract of my flat terminates in June so I will need to relocate then anyway.

Can anyone give me advice on how to tell my manager I'm leaving. Thanks

Oldernotwiser

I wouldn't worry about it until you've actually been offered another job; it might take some time in the current climate.

DCFC79

Your future should be the first thing on your mind, what happens at work re other staff leaving shouldnt mean u feel you have to stay

rcoo80

Thanks for your reply. I will still have to tell my manager even though I haven't got another job as my flat contract finishes in June so I wil have to give 4 weeks notice at the beginning of May which is not long.

rcoo80

DCFC79 wrote: »

Your future should be the first thing on your mind, what happens at work re other staff leaving shouldnt mean u feel you have to stay

Thanks - that's what my partner said as well. I just cant help feeling guilty about leaving them in the proverbial!! But I suppose I can't put my life on hold because I don't want to upset my manager!

Oldernotwiser

rcoo80 wrote: »

Thanks for your reply. I will still have to tell my manager even though I haven't got another job as my flat contract finishes in June so I wil have to give 4 weeks notice at the beginning of May which is not long.

You're surely not going to give in your notice without another job to go to just on the basis of a lease ending? Far easier to find another flat than to find another job.

rcoo80

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

You're surely not going to give in your notice without another job to go to just on the basis of a lease ending? Far easier to find another flat than to find another job.

This is why I feel trapped!! I'm stuck in a job I dont want to do, a flat I dont like, 200 miles from my nearest family. If I renew my tenacy here it means I'm tied in for another 12 months, being miserable away from my family. So I'm willing to take the risk and be without a job for a while for the sake of my sanity. My partner has secured a job in the location we're moving to so we willl have some sort of income. I have one interview lined up for that's a positive start. But the problem is I dont know how/when to tell my manager I'm leaving.

heretolearn_2

Firstly, don't feel guilty about it. It's not your fault other staff members are also leaving.

Ask to have a meeting with your manager. Keep it short and simple ' I'm handing in my notice as my partner has a new job in X and we are re-locating there.'

If you want, you can add 'I'm sorry to be leaving' or something, but it's only to make you feel better.

That's it.

I know it's hard to hand in your notice, but you've got to take the bull by the horns and do it.

wontfallforit

rcoo80 wrote: »

Hi

I would be grateful of some advice please.

I'm planning on relocating to be closer to my family so I need to leave my current job. But I feel like I can't as my department is very small with a heavy workload and we are very short staffed. We are a team of 4, myself, my manager and two others. But the two others have just handed their notices in!! Which means if I leave as well there will be no staff!! So I feel like I have a moral obligation to stay even though I dont want to. My manager is very stressed with the situation so I'm scared about telling her I'm leaving. I have an interview lined up next week so I need say something to my manager soon but I dont no what to say. I would feel so guilty to leave my manager with no staff but I want to leave and my contract of my flat terminates in June so I will need to relocate then anyway.

Can anyone give me advice on how to tell my manager I'm leaving. Thanks

Whilst it's nice of you to consider the impact of your leaving upon your employer, you've got to be a bit selfish sometimes. It's "only" a job, and it shouldn't dictate the direction of your life...

However, good advice from Oldernotwiser...unless you have an extremely generous and supportive family (financially and otherwise!), you may struggle to either find that new job, or to claim any assistance whilst you're jobseeking (JSA, etc.).

If you're dead-set on leaving, it might be a good idea to start scouting for new jobs closer to your new location now. At the very least, it'd be wise to start your search before you take the plunge, rather than arriving back home and expecting to land a new job.

Best wishes x

rcoo80

wontfallforit wrote: »

Whilst it's nice of you to consider the impact of your leaving upon your employer, you've got to be a bit selfish sometimes. It's "only" a job, and it shouldn't dictate the direction of your life...

However, good advice from Oldernotwiser...unless you have an extremely generous and supportive family (financially and otherwise!), you may struggle to either find that new job, or to claim any assistance whilst you're jobseeking (JSA, etc.).

If you're dead-set on leaving, it might be a good idea to start scouting for new jobs closer to your new location now. At the very least, it'd be wise to start your search before you take the plunge, rather than arriving back home and expecting to land a new job.

Best wishes x

Thanks for your advice. Its difficult as I'm quite friendly with my manager so I feel that by leaving I'm dropping her in it but I know I've got to turn my emotions off!!

I have started applying for jobs in the area I'm relocating to, I've made a good start and applied for 5 jobs so far with one interview lined up so I'm positive I've made a good start.

Thanks

paulwf

It is easy to get wrapped up in a job and think that you can't manage without a team member or even that the team can't manage without you! The truth is life goes on and the business goes on, new team members bring a fresh perspective and some new energy to the team and everything goes on - or better - than before. Don't worry about leaving.

Personally I think you are making the right decision. It is so easy to get stuck in a rut of not moving because there is never the right time, next thing you know 10 years have passed.