Learn to control money but do not allow it to control you

Double_Trouble

Hugs to you Firewalker I have only just caught up and I don't think your feelings are wrong everyone's circumstances are different and each situation has its own unique solution and nothing is wrong if it is right for you and your situation.

I need to reread your thread there are so many gems and insights in your posts that need investigating when I have time and space but first I have to get OS home

DTx

savingwannabe

Firewalker wrote: »

A brief note while I am resting – breaking all MG’s rules, I am afraid, and instead of getting water or moving around I am resting but writing here. Well, she will tell me off if she knew but then again fair is fair.

Yesterday I was thinking again about the little things that make our lives. Many of us think that life has some grand purpose and consists of great significant events. I used to think that…But now I have come to realise that there is no grand purpose or intention; that there are about three things that are important in our lives (health, procreation and wealth) and that life consists of very significant events but they are usually so small that we miss them.

Yesterday was an example of how something small can change your day. I had my haircut with the guy who has done it for over ten years now; so we know each other quite well. Let put it this way – I was around through his divorce, his second marriage, the birth of his children, his Mum’s illness. He cut my hair first when I was pregnant with Little Boy. So, yesterday he asked after different members of my family and when he asked after my Dad I just started crying and told him. Naturally, I was feeling rather gloomy after leaving the salon.

Then I was walking back, engrossed in my thoughts and heard this beautiful music. It was one of the well know Christmas songs which would have sounded annoying. Except that it was played as jazz – it was improvised and there was a certain element of chalga in it (chalga is another name for the rhythm of gypsy music). Sure enough – there were five gypsy guys (I think they were continental Roma) having great time themselves and playing this song that went straight to ones heart and lifted it to heaven.

This changed my day and allowed me to open to the experience of the world.

Firewalker

What would i do without you dear Firewalker? Thank you.

Firewalker

Sometime ago I mentioned that one of my ‘aha’s was that most of us look better after our possessions than after our assets, particularly our main asset which ourselves, of course. So we polish our shoes but forget to brush up our knowledge; we wash our cars but don’t exercise; we make wills but forget to fill in necessary forms.

Understanding, however, is no substitute to action. Even after I had this ‘aha’ I still neglect to act on things that are for me. Today all this changed and I am pleased to say that instead of doing stuff that is urgent I did something that is very important – I filled in, wrote and had signed all documents needed to apply for sabbatical. This means that if all goes to plan with a particular committee I will have a year sabbatical beginning July, 1st 2011. And this in turn means that I will have a year to write, and think and visit universities where people really want me.

Usually on Friday I do the accounts for the week. Since we did decide that we will simplify the accounting system this will not be possible any longer. But I can say that we managed to live within the set budget for the weekly regular expenses.

Firewalker

Firewalker

Two things have happened since I last wrote here. First, I have a ticket for tomorrow morning (very early) to go to Sofia. And second, I am so tired at the moment that last night I feel asleep at 9.30 with my glasses on and my Kindle open on to Kill a Mocking Bird.

Falling asleep while reading TKAMB is sacrilege, I think – it is so good and the writing is, well, awesome (the only word I can find for it although normally I would not consider using it). I am well into it now and can’t wait to go back and finish it. It will have to wait, however, because I need to do several things today. Running, two parties, some house jobs, cooking and packing. Which neatly leads me to the trip.

Yesterday, after serious consideration and soul searching, I booked myself on the early morning flight to Sofia. My Dad’s condition is serious but sister’s condition is even more serious. When I stopped myself thinking and trying to decide the answer came very clear – I should go. This is my chance to say good bye to my Dad, to try and make arrangements for his care (my sister does need help with this one) and to offer some support to my sister.

And I am absolutely dreading it – I am dreading seeing my Dad as he has become; I am really not very good when it comes to looking after people (this is on all possible levels; from being squeamish to not being good with feelings) and I am so tired that any further pressure can tip me over. But we shall see – I might be fine after all.

I only wish that nothing happens and I can be back for Christmas,


Firewalker

groatie_queen

Sending you strength and courage for handling the situation in Sofia. We will be with you in thought and in spirit, and hopefully you will feel that support winging its way to you.

My experience when my parents were failing is that strength comes when you need it, but be prepared for all sorts of emotions, memories etc, and do whatever you personally need to do to keep looking after yourself and restoring yourself. I'm sure your sister will be very glad of your presence and also your father. The chance to spend time with him is very precious.

Go safely, remember all the support you have

GQ xox

gilligansyle

(((hugs)))

You need to do what is right for you, your sister definitely needs some support.
Will be thinking of you.

Aesop

(((((((Firewalker)))))))))), well done on making such a hard decision, have a safe journey and I hope you are not so tired, that it tips you over. Sending you strength. xx

NorthernLas

FW -

When you get there you will cope. Sadly there is no magic wand to make things better. But by providing practical help and support you can make memories that you will smile about in years to come.

Time and life is precious as you well know, go to your sister and to your Dad who is still proud man you know. The people inside the bodies are the things to look after and nourish, the outside is something that is a neccessity on this planet (otherwise we would be like large blobby slugs )

Sending thoughts of peace with you. Have set my phone alarm so I remember to send extra tomorrow.

NL x

savingwannabe

Firewalker i will pray for you. You are doing all you can, you cannot do any more. Please remember we all love you dearly. Bless you my friend love kitX

Ellidee

Firewalker will be thinking of you. Take care.xx