Estrangement

Taiko

It's difficult, more so after the first year. The OP though is not estranged.

StudentInCrisis_2

I feel you are judging me and you do not know me. I am not currently living at home I live full time at university because I avoid going home.

My parents are only happy to do whatever because they want me out!

Taiko I feel you have been very judgemental and yes I can understand you are cynical. I am greatful for the responses I've had here (the ones which have been helpful) although I did think this was a place not for judgement.

StudentInCrisis_2

bestpud wrote: »

Let's say it how it is - you are struggling to cope with the current level of support you receive and realise that will go down when you are assessed this year, so you, granny, and possibly your parents, have hatched a plot to defraud student finance.

That's how it looks to me anyway!

I'm sorry but how dare you make such an accusation. As I said above you do not know me or know all the facts. I'm sorry that I'm not willing to disclose eveything in a public forum to complete strangers.

And hatching plots with granny? My Gran has kindly offered me a place to live so that I don't have to go home anymore. So kindly keep your wrongful opinions to yourself.

Oldernotwiser

You have been correctly advised by 2 people currently working in this field and one person who used to. It's not our fault that you don't like the advice you've been given; nobody is going to advise you how to defraud the system.

You don't seem to understand that being estranged is stringently investigated, specifically to exclude people like you who just don't get on with their parents or who want to get more money!

Taiko

StudentInCrisis wrote: »

I feel you are judging me and you do not know me. I am not currently living at home I live full time at university because I avoid going home.

My parents are only happy to do whatever because they want me out!

Taiko I feel you have been very judgemental and yes I can understand you are cynical. I am greatful for the responses I've had here (the ones which have been helpful) although I did think this was a place not for judgement.

Working as an assessor, it's my job to be judgemental. It's what I do for a living, and what I get paid to do.

You're certainly not independent, and I can guarantee you will not be awarded that status. SFE are more stringent than myself, and as mentioned it's even harder to prove after the first year. I would not take your welfare advisors word for it, as they don't know both parties involved.

ultimatedingbat

I would also agree Taiko. Not a specialist in this field but going by 2 friends/aquantainsances, one who had genuinly fallen out with her parents, and one who decided to see what she could get, neither who got awarded Estrangement/Independance and their circumstances were much more convincing (in the genuinley fallen out case) and the other defrauding party was found out.

StudentInCrisis_2

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

You have been correctly advised by 2 people currently working in this field and one person who used to. It's not our fault that you don't like the advice you've been given; nobody is going to advise you how to defraud the system.

You don't seem to understand that being estranged is stringently investigated, specifically to exclude people like you who just don't get on with their parents or who want to get more money!

Hiya OlderNotWiser,

I am very happy with Taiko's response and do understand it, I am just not happy with the accusation (sp?) that this is some plot to get more money/that I am making this all up.

Either way, I am goin to see how things go, turns out I may be in luck with some funding through a charity I applied to (to do with my current degree/future plans) which will be very greatly appreciated.

ipswichblade

ultimatedingbat wrote: »

I would also agree Taiko. Not a specialist in this field but going by 2 friends/aquantainsances, one who had genuinly fallen out with her parents, and one who decided to see what she could get, neither who got awarded Estrangement/Independance and their circumstances were much more convincing (in the genuinley fallen out case) and the other defrauding party was found out.

Would also agree with the above. I am estranged from my parents and it's annoying for us genuine cases, to think that loads of people try to claim to be estranged for student finance. Makes the process more difficult although I must say SF have been great with my application(s).
It's not a matter of just not getting on with your parents or having a fall out with them every now and then.
To the OP-it's not a matter of people saying you're making it up (I'm sure you're not and would like to think very few people if any would make something like this up) or you're only wanting to do this for more money-but to be estranged you really need to have had no contact with your parents for a certain amount of time before applying for finance for uni. In my case, it was for over 2 years before going to uni.

StudentInCrisis_2

Ipswhichblade - Thanks for your post and I'm sorry things were sour. And also thanks for the understanding. I agree truely I don't see why anyone would make this up because to go through it is not fun.

It seems it is all going to be sour for me now but I will struggle through. I thought it was worth looking to see if anything would change but didn't really expect much. It was a friend who mentioned it actually I was just going to let them keep putting their details in.

Currently moving my stuff into my nan's this weekend so hopefully the time apart will be good for us.

To be honest, I don't want to fight with them. You never know, things might sort themselves out with me living away.

I think really the only thing I'm worried about now is the relationship with my younger sister. We used to get on really well (really well for sisters anyway) so I'm hoping to build bridges with her.

In terms of SF well I've managed without the support from my parents for a year while living there (well sorta living there if you get me) so I guess will just have to keep doing it. Hopefully I can find some work because I don't want a free ride living at my Nan's. I want to pull my weight, help with bills etc if I can.

ipswichblade

StudentInCrisis wrote: »

Ipswhichblade - Thanks for your post and I'm sorry things were sour. And also thanks for the understanding. I agree truely I don't see why anyone would make this up because to go through it is not fun.

It seems it is all going to be sour for me now but I will struggle through. I thought it was worth looking to see if anything would change but didn't really expect much. It was a friend who mentioned it actually I was just going to let them keep putting their details in.

Currently moving my stuff into my nan's this weekend so hopefully the time apart will be good for us.

To be honest, I don't want to fight with them. You never know, things might sort themselves out with me living away.

I think really the only thing I'm worried about now is the relationship with my younger sister. We used to get on really well (really well for sisters anyway) so I'm hoping to build bridges with her.

In terms of SF well I've managed without the support from my parents for a year while living there (well sorta living there if you get me) so I guess will just have to keep doing it. Hopefully I can find some work because I don't want a free ride living at my Nan's. I want to pull my weight, help with bills etc if I can.

Couldn't help but reply when I read this. Since being disowned by my parents (due to my choice of partner) they've made it very difficult for me to see my sister-so cruel.
I really hope you get things sorted out and I am sure you will. I don't hold out much hope for myself which is a shame so I don't want anyone else to go through it. It's not nice.