*** Wednesday 31st March Daily Chat - where has this month gone?***

beanielou

Bookie#everything falling in to place nicely then.

katsu

beanielou

if you want a punkk bunny seriously do PM me your postal addy as I have enough supplies to make a spare (I have 3 flannels left).

postingalwaysposting

beanielou wrote: »

Not free but is quite heavily subsidised.
Great oppertunity though.

If he doesn't get a subsidised place could he still go? Could you afford to send him? Just wondered as Sammy said there is something we could do?

katsu

or a pink one even

judi24

Thanks Butti and Luc your replies are very helpfull - I am not looking forward to this meeting at all but it has to be done - I wouldn't mind 0 but when I started this job in Nov last year I had to work very closely with her and we got on ok - we have never had an arguement or words of any kind - but she is not happy that I was given part of her job and is cousing loads of problems but in very subtle ways without actually confronting me. It is affecting my staff so has got to be sorted out. She won't challenge me directly cos she likes to pick on people she can intimidate - which I am not!

She is making no secret of the fact she is looking for another job but that could take a while these days so it needs to be sorted out!

Butti

I'm off....some of you will have known that already!

Judi - You have to give us a chance to think and type before you think you've killed the thread. I do quality not speed (you could ask her about that in relation to her lover aswell tomorrow if you think !!!!!! this I'll just embarrass her!*)

B

*won't stand up in an industrial tribunal

beanielou

There are only 2 places.
If he gets to go I will gladly increase my debt to pay for it.
Some things (not many mind) are worth it.

Lucifa73

judi24 wrote: »

Got to think up what I need to say beforehand otherwise I might end up saying what I think - and the result might be bad!!!!

Speak what you want to say out loud to yourself. It'll help you retain it better. make notes and stick to them too. :grouphug:

Have any evidence clearly noted and to hand

Don't let her sidetrack it. Just calmly say 'Let me finish what I have to say then you can respond to the whole'

And I really think even a 15mins with the other party to the meeting is a good idea.

Ask her to email you and her boss a summary of her understanding of the meeting so that you can see whether she has taken away the messages you wanted to give. Crossed wires are not helpful, particularly if she is going to feel defensive,and evidence may be needed for HR down the line. By getting her version of the meeting you are avoiding future pitfalls of the 'that's not what was said' variety. Ideally all three of you should document your experience of the meeting...

And if all else fails me and Spud will come get her while we do Snaggs' Permatan Plank:D

judi24

Lucifa73 wrote: »

"Your attitude to your work and colleagues is seriously affecting morale and performance (insert 2 examples). I also find your inability to accept the change in our respective roles obstructive. I would appreciate if you can (insert requirements) so that both our lives are easier. In addition, whilst your personal affairs (add stress and meaningful glance) are your business it has come to my attention that inappropriate media is being circulated and if I were to find specific examples of this behaviour I will have to take the matter further (unless you have definitive proof then tell her to stop or else!)"

Does that help?

If she butts in at any point ask her to let you speak your piece first (in fact ask her to listen up front and tell her she will have a chance to respond when you are finished talking).

If you can pre meet with your colleague to go through what you want to say it may help you get the words/issues straight in your head as once verbalised they are clearer, easier to remember and easier to articulate the second time around. It will also mean your colleague has no surprises to deal with in what will be a tough meeting.

Good luck!

That is very diplomatic! Wish you lived closer - i would give you a job!

Butti

Yes we could always come and run her over for you.

B