childminders 'additional costs' am i being unreasonable here?

brians_daughter

Hi all, I am being made to feel that i am being unreasonable regarding my childminders 'additional costs' so i am looking for some unbiased opinions here! But be gentle lol

My youngest goes to a childminders, and shes fab - hes happy, we love her! BUT, she has recently told us that she will be changing the activities the kids do. I have a few issues here

my son goes on monday afternoon, and has done for some time - at her request - she was fully booked in the monday morning- fair enough we re-arranged work around this. Now she is saying that if we want him to go monday he must go the full day (she now has the room for him, but it was agreed that mon pm only was ok with no intention of changing thsi should a place become free for him) as she intends to go to a group that lasts 11-2 so he needs to go the full day.

However, she is now saying she wants an additional money for new costs she is going to face

£3 for each child on monday to pay for the group she wants to attend- even tho the group she currently attends on monday is free and shes been going a few years

£3.50 on Wednesday as she is starting to go to another play group as she 'doesnt like' the one they currently attend on wednesdays (the cost of the current one is included in his fees)

£2 extra on Friday as she is going to start to take the kids swimming as she only has 2 children now on friday.

TBH i am a bit put out that she now wants an extra £8.50 a week - so almost £40 per month then she can change the activities she does with the kids, not to mention the additional £80 i need to pay every month so he can still keep his monday place- even tho he doesnt need to go the am, but must go in order to keep his pm slot!

So i now face haiving to find an additional £120 pcm for him to continue going there.

As i say, she is great with the kids and he loves going so changing isnt something i wish to consider atm - but when i mentioned that all the additional costs mount up to almost £1000 per year more she seemed to have the attitude of 'thats what i am doing so like it or lump it!'

Another parent has approached me and has the same opinion as me and has also voiced her concerns about the costs going up - but has been told its the cost of the activities not her day rate that is going up so the contract we have is still valid etc.

So, am i being unfair by feeling quite angry at facing these costs or not? I know they are attending groups etc and thats good, but she already takes them to free groups so i cant see what my son will gain from the additional costs - certianally no additional child contact etc. Her reasoning isnt from an educational point of view, it is simply she doesnt like going anymore as the other childminders are all attending this new group

Anyone been in simular situ at all, and how did you reslove it?

edit to say.. myself and the other Mother that approached me have discussed maybe finding alternative arrangements where both our children can attend togther in hope that the transition is a little smoother, but it took me 6 months to find a childminder i was happy with in the first place! But we would rather stay with the one we have for the kids sakes

Pee

The only way of resolving it has to be talking it through with her, and if she is really good and you don't want to change childminders, I see you as being in a weak position as she is clearly quite determined on this course of action.

If you do not want to change, I think you have to accept it.

If you could change and would be willing to do so, you can broach the subject with her with that as your fall back position.

a_confused_mum

Hi

I am a childminder so may sound biased but I'll try not to be.!

I think it is a bit unfair for her to now ask for the extra when considering she dint before...especially as it was free.

I would never take children swimming especially as out local one only had a 1-1 ratio anyway..how do you feel about your child going swimming? if you dont mind then there is no problem, but I know I wouldn't be able to concentrate properly on them enjoying it as I would need eyes in the back of my head especially swimming. She can;t demand to take them if you dont want her to!.

She cannot demand your child go in the morning that she was previously fully booked with, she had the contract for afternoon only so now trying to effectively charge you all day now she has a space is wrong. so she needs to change her plans as per your contract.!...its not like she is missing out taking them to other places as she takes them on other days.

Think you really need to speak to her and come to some sort of compromise as that is a lot for her to expect YOU to change...

mummy_Jay

This is a lot of change all at once, has she had a falling out with someone that attends her normal activities.

Check what your contract states first, I have had contracts that state the certain activities were included. It may be worth getting together with the other parent and speaking to her about it, maybe she would consider only doing one of these additional activities that require additional fees.

As for the swimming idea, she has two little ones, I personally wouldn't be comfortable with this, I did when my DS about 1 have a childminder that on occasion took my DS swimming but only when it was just him, as she (and I) considered it too much to cope with two young children on your own in a swimming pool. I would raise a safety concern on this one.

brians_daughter

a_confused_mum wrote: »

Hi

I am a childminder so may sound biased but I'll try not to be.!

I think it is a bit unfair for her to now ask for the extra when considering she dint before...especially as it was free.

I would never take children swimming especially as out local one only had a 1-1 ratio anyway..how do you feel about your child going swimming? if you dont mind then there is no problem, but I know I wouldn't be able to concentrate properly on them enjoying it as I would need eyes in the back of my head especially swimming. She can;t demand to take them if you dont want her to!.

She cannot demand your child go in the morning that she was previously fully booked with, she had the contract for afternoon only so now trying to effectively charge you all day now she has a space is wrong. so she needs to change her plans as per your contract.!...its not like she is missing out taking them to other places as she takes them on other days.

Think you really need to speak to her and come to some sort of compromise as that is a lot for her to expect YOU to change...

Thanks, its good to hear views from a childminder. re swimming she has an assitant who does a few mornings with her so it would be 1-2-1 so i am ok with this

I willl mention the monday am to her on monday when i see her next.

It wouldnt have been so bad if she phased them in so to speak, so asked for additional for 1 activity for a few moths then introduced another... I really dont want to have to change as she is great with the kids, same goes for her family members too. They really make the kids feel part of the family and i would be sad to loose this

jackieglasgow

I agree, safety concern on the swimming, and also, I would feel put out if I were you that you have to pay for her social activities. Yes, the children are with her, but they enjoy the present club, she's only changing because it suits her (I would also think she's had a falling out with someone), and there is no additional benefit for your children (I am referring to the other mum here, too) in going to a different activity. Additionally, I think she has a bit of a cheek expecting you to take a full day when you don't need it, and agreed an afternoon with her originally, surely that would be a change of the contract, so it wouldn't be the same as the previous one. The problem is that she has you between a rock and a hard place. You need the childcare, you atm have a good relationship, but if you fight her too hard it will destroy that, and how would you feel leaving the LO there if that happened. But on the other hand, if you are anything like me this will have pee'd you off no end, and might still be hard to come back from.

Just had another thought, will the swimming not be free for the under 5's at your local pool?

cannyscot_2

We had a similarish problem where the childminder whom we liked and were very considerate to ie extra money at xmas etc had extra spaces and wanted to move us -we were after school -to a Monday and charge all the bank holidays to us but not have the kids when neither of us get bank holidays. Long and short we thought compromise we like her so we dropped the one day as it was just too costly and difficult to have Mondays. BOTTOM LINE :- she had made up her mind influenced by other chilminders around her and very shortly after the arrangement ended at her bequest as she could fill the space with other kids who paid more.

SO be aware that childminders have you in some way over a barrel. What amazed me was that despite building up a relationship with my kids over 2 years that didn;t seem to matter when it came to filling spaces and getting money. Money won!

In your case she wants to fill her Monday and she wants to go with her chums to the more expensive toddler groups so she will not be happy otherwise . Before you take a decision think through are you prepared for her to end the contract? How busy is your area for childminders-could you get alternative childcare if it went wrong?

floss2

Have you spoken to the Childminders Association for guidance? NCMA

brians_daughter

cannyscot wrote: »

How busy is your area for childminders-could you get alternative childcare if it went wrong?

Well, tbh we have done some ringing around and there are a few places that would take my child and the other mums as well. But it comes down to if they are for us doesnt it? I am so lucky that i do have 2 sets of grandparents i can fall back on, but they help out enough already and wouldnt want to feel i was crossing the line of 'duty to have him' rather than 'wanting to have him' iykwim?

brians_daughter

floss2 wrote: »

Have you spoken to the Childminders Association for guidance? NCMA

Oh no, i didnt even know they existed! But i will call once my lo has stopped throwing his lunch around the living room and settles down for a sleep!

sarahs999

Why so much change so suddenly? Has she got an OFsted looming that she's worried about?

Also. If the cost of the current playgroup on WEds is included in the fees, then that cost should be taken out of the fees before the exxtra £3.50 is added on. Surely the playgroups cannot cost hugely differing amounts? Wouldn't the fees you already pay cover it?