is this a witch hunt at work or am I being paranoid?

gitw

One month ago I was called into a meeting with HR and my line manager where I was advised that I was subject to a disciplinary hearing and handed a letter listing four grievances (under company policy this would be seen as inability to do job and they could dismiss me without any warnings):

1) refusing to do filing – what I actually said was I was very busy (work large team) but would do it as and when I could and that when they got back off their months holiday it would hopefully be done
2) personal phone calls – just not true and I offered my phone records (personal & work) to prove, except my stepmom died on xmas eve so there have been more calls with my dad because of that but they are aware and I pointed out I didn’t take compassionate leave as I am entitled to so the odd phone call, which everyone makes, should not be unreasonable
3) too much time on internet – not true only for work – personal sites are blocked and again I volunteered for them to check my pc.
4) not following process and sending email to wrong person internally – the person supervising me on the take over on the job was cc’d on every email and did not tell me I had done anything wrong at all – I still don’t know what I was supposed to have done wrong on that

NB complaints 1 and 4 were made by Person 1, who used to do my job before I joined 2 years ago but recently her position was dissolved and she is now foraging for work. 2&4 I understand were also Person 1 but also Person 2 – they couldn’t tell me who but gave me a big unofficial indication. It turns out that Person 1 & Person 2 are rather friendly and it now seems to me that they are in cahoots (I am PA to the person that will take over from Person 2’s boss when he retires in the next year and Person 2 is newer to the company than me)

In light of the comments I made above they said they would need to investigate further before making a decision as to action and an appointment was made for a week later

So I prepared myself for the meeting with answers, facts and figures but never got as far as having to use them because when I arrived at the meeting HR told me they had followed an email/telephone trail and were not interested in pursuing any of the matters brought up, to the point that they were not keeping any record at all on my file. They did give me a couple of bits of advice, in writing, on how to deal with a certain person and confirmed they were not taking the matter any further. A follow up meeting has been set for Thursday just to check how things are.

Person 1 who made the complaint is now back from their months holiday (they reported me the day before they went away) and is being very nice to me, to the point that other team members, who are aware of the situation, have commented on her two-faced-ness. I am just acting professionally as I am paid to look after her as well but outside of work I wouldn’t not give her the time of day (not that we ever socialise).

And that was the end of the matter as far as I was concerned, except this follow-up meeting on Thursday which I am more than happy with.

Fortunately the rest of my team are good and I was able to confide in them, and got their complete support and offers to act as character witnesses to HR etc.

Today though one of the team told me that they were on facebook to an ex colleague last night (one that I have never met) and they were asking about me and how I was getting on in the job. When colleague said I was nice and doing a good job ex colleague apparently responded ‘that’s not what she had heard and told colleague i was on a written warning’.

It now turns out that another PA, Person 3, who is very good friends with the Person 2 and Person 1, has just been on holiday and stayed with the ex colleague who made the comments on facebook.

The question is what do I do?

At the moment I am very unhappy and feel that I am being picked on for no justifiable reason. Should I bring this up with HR and express my unhappiness and concern or do I just ignore it and rise above it. I’m just worried that there is a bit of a witch-hunt going on and don’t want to come a croppa.

GSXRCarlos

hi, unfortunately i have no formal advice, but you may want to raise the facebook stuff on thursday - that way HR will be aware of all the details

Depending on what has been said between Persons 1,2 &3 it could be seen as bullying and this is a matter for HR whether in or out of your workplace

good luck

Emmzi

if you *want* to do something, then you probably need a copy of facebook comments to present as a formal greivance.

I would probably rise above it and be the better person. Otherwise you put nice colleague in a bad position and get into a huge tit for tat.

epatolles

its totally hard for someone to rise above it when theres several people trying to get at you...

my best advice... do the best job you can, be nice to these backstabbers but make sure you keep ALL evidence i.e screenprints from facebook - because these people sound sly so will probably delete once they hear something is up. Also if anything else happens if you keep a diary with dates and times and what happened (quotes are excellent) their lies will all come unstuck and you will bask in the glory :-)

am I right in thinking HR think these allegations are all false? if so it would be worth mentioning that you are feeling down about whats happened because you've been doing a good job and havent done anything wrong etc etc.

from personal experience I find being really nice to people who don't like you actually kills them inside so it's definately worth doing.

BudgetBlonde

This is a horrible situation to be in and I totally empathise. In a previous life, I was bullied at work by a colleague and my boss - who were in cahoots. It sounds ridiculous now (8 years on) as they didn't do anything obvious but at the time they made me feel so stupid and worthless I ended up taking 6 months off work with stress and depression and ended up hating a job that I had previously enjoyed.

It's so difficult to "rise above it" and honestly you shouldn't have to - this behaviour is simply not on! Keep records of every single comment and conversation and take them home (I printed emails and such out, they mysteriously disappeared from my desk along with all my previous excellent performance reviews, and while I was off my work id was changed!). At the review, I would mention that you have a grievance and I would ask it to be noted even if you don't want to pursue this now.
Also, try ACAS for unbiased advice and support.

Good luck! x

loisa

I don't think you are being paranoid at all.
I worked with someone who was just like the person you have described (she started off in my job funnily enough!) Unfortunately I was only a temp and I didn't have a leg to stand on when it hit the fan.

Ignoring a problem won't make it go away, I just tried to keep my head down and tell myself that I was being paranoid but it just got worse.
IMO the only person you can really trust at work is yourself. If your insinct is telling you that something is not quite right then don't be afraid to deal with it by speaking to HR.

yellowduck_2

so sorry to hear that you are having a tough time at work. As others have said, keep records of what happens, often things seem trivial in isolation but when you have notes a pattern can emerge.

Gingernutmeg

It sounds to me like Person 1 is bullying you, or trying to, and she's whipping up support from 2 and 3. However, I'd be a little bit wary of confiding in other people at work - there's always the risk that the things you say are then taken out of context and it's twisted to look like you're the one causing trouble. I'd also be careful of rocking any boat too much unless you're absolutely sure that people will support you when it comes to making formal complaints. People have a habit of promising all kinds of support but melting away if there's even a whisper that their own record might be tarnished.

Hard though it is, I think you need to keep your head down, and for the time being keep a record of anything that goes off, no matter how trivial. Facebook printouts would be very helpful, if you can get hold of them. Sometimes in these cases it's a case of giving someone enough rope and letting them hang themselves, if you can deal with it. Bullies have a habit of doing this if they think they can get away with it. I would make HR aware that you're not at all happy with what's gone off though.

eamon

The dangerous world of Facebook & gossip. One tip when away from you desk for any length of time lock down your PC to prevent unauthorised use.

gitw

Emmzi: i dont 'want' to do anything because there is no substance to it and I am just not that kind of person. However with today's events I am fiding it very hard to keep a cool head. I pride myself on being professional and good at my job and am determined not let someone get the better of me but I just don't get this - it's not in my nature to be nasty and I can't believe that other people can be, for no apparent reason that I can see. In addition, to my face, 1, 2 & 3 (I did consider 2 & 3 to be people I could trust) are all nice to me so now I am getting paranoid about everyone.

and no your right I wouldnt want to involve other nice colleagues, I think I was hoping I could tell the info to HR without naming names but in reality HR couldnt do anything without me doing that.

my new mantra is: in with hate out with love!

Emmzi wrote: »

if you *want* to do something, then you probably need a copy of facebook comments to present as a formal greivance.

I would probably rise above it and be the better person. Otherwise you put nice colleague in a bad position and get into a huge tit for tat.

gitw

the meeting last month was incredibly stressful as came completly out of the blue (which combined with emotions because I have had family deaths to deal with since xmas - but no time off, other than holiday already booked) but I did rise above it and have treated Person 1 as I treat all others I work for (the complaints made were obviously from her)

I am now going to start keeping notes although I'm not sure what of because they are nice to my face so unless i 'hear' anything....

And yes HR have completly dropped the matter - I get on fairly well with my HR lady and get the impression that she is dropping me hints without compromising herself. I feel confident talking to them because I think they can see that I am a good honest person and that something is not right - but maybe I'm wrong - I don't know now!

epatolles wrote: »

its totally hard for someone to rise above it when theres several people trying to get at you...

my best advice... do the best job you can, be nice to these backstabbers but make sure you keep ALL evidence i.e screenprints from facebook - because these people sound sly so will probably delete once they hear something is up. Also if anything else happens if you keep a diary with dates and times and what happened (quotes are excellent) their lies will all come unstuck and you will bask in the glory :-)

am I right in thinking HR think these allegations are all false? if so it would be worth mentioning that you are feeling down about whats happened because you've been doing a good job and havent done anything wrong etc etc.

from personal experience I find being really nice to people who don't like you actually kills them inside so it's definately worth doing.