Advice Needed Please

caroline78

We tried to phone tonight to see about his things and she wouldn't answer the phone, then sent us a message saying she couldn't find his bus pass and books, but would give them to the youngest child to give to him tomorrow. We walked down and she wasn't in, away to her friends again (prob till about 3am, no doubt), but the eldest child was in and was able to give us them straight away without looking for them...she is just being petty I think, which maybe it's just because I would dearly love a child (see my sig), but I find awful that any mother could treat their children like this.

Wow

caroline78 wrote: »

I don't think she would allow it for that exact reason..

It still might be worth taking proper advice though caroline. I think arranging a meeting with the Social Services should be your first port of call and at least you can ask them for advice.

caroline78

First of all thank you for all your replies.

We didn't do anything this week as we wanted to see if the child changed his mind, or was swaying between the two houses. We didn't want him to be doing this for the wrong reasons, but up till now he is still determined that he is not going home. We sat him down tonight and explained that no one will make him do anything he doesn't want to, and that no one will be angry at him no matter what he decides to do. He is still adamant that he is staying here. He made mothers day cards in school today and brought home two...said this one is for that other mother down there, and this one is for you, hope it's okay it says Mum on it...I was over the moon..

So we have decided to phone Social Services tomorrow and let them deal with it. We have explained that it may turn a bit nasty and his Mum may fall out with us for a while, but that none of this is his fault.

We have already informed the school that this may be taking place and they are fully on our side, the younger child as only been at school one day this week, so they know that the mother isn't really a good parent. We have also spoken to various groups that he attends and explained things to them too.

My partner was a bit iffy at involving Social Workers, as his family, both close and wider, have had then involved in the past and he had had various nieces and nephews removed from their homes. He had only ever seen the bad side of them, but I think I have finally gotten through to him that they only work in the best interest of the child. He was a bit worried that it would affect the younger child too...like the Social Workers were going to remove her from the home, but like I said we are not accusing the Mum of mis treating the children, or anything, it's just that the son doesn't want to live there anymore.

Does anyone know that once we phone the Social Services, do we have to have any contact with the mum, do we have to answer phone calls, or the door if she appears, as I think she will turn quite nasty and accuse us of interfering. However, we haven't heard a word from her since Sunday apart from when I phoned her on Monday night.

Has anyone been through anything similar and can anyone offer anymore advice.

Thanks for your patience with me...