customer compliance officer

bumble3130

I really need some advice on this as im making myself feel very ill!!!
ill describe him as my bf but i feel a little old to be saying i have a bf - id just easier to type. we are engaged and were due to marry this year which we have cancelled due to finanical circumstance.

Thursday im taking my son to school and my boyfriend texts me to tell me man from council was knocking on door asking for me. Apprently he asked if my bf was a resident and he said no im her bf i stay here occasionally and then then council man asks for bf's name.

i later ring council when they havent returned and they say its regarding an appeal id made awhile ago regarding housing benefit (which is awhile ago now when i started work they had made a huge mistake on my application!)and could i come into discuss it as its something that shouldnt have been overlooked and has

then hour later i get letter in post from DWP saying someone needs to see me to discuss a query in my claim to benefit and a customer compliance officer. i ring the number as the times stated included school hours and i wanted to make them aware i had school runs to do..while on phone i asked what this query was...they have apparently had a report my bf has moved in with me and they stated his full name.

have recently had alot of hassel from an ex partner of my bf's (13yrs ago ex!) and i have a strong gut feeling its her as shes already caused enough stress for him.

im worried sick about this visit from the officer!
my bf does stay and with my son being mildly autistic and works well on routines we keep the overnight stays to the same nights. wed, fri and sat... occasionally he has stayed a sunday too and over xmas he stayed for a week. have i been commiting fraud by doing this?! ive been very wary and when we started seeing each other i rang council and asked them how often he could stay and was told that they look at if he contributes towards household , where clothes are and where he pays rent etc.

he has none of his things here apart from a tv which is here as i otherwise dont have one. no clothes. bills and letters all go to his mothers.
he sleeps on a mattress at his brothers house and pays him £40 a week to stay there.
we were hoping to move in together but a situation happened and he had a mental breakdown and lost his job. we even visited jobcentre together to ask how my benefits would be affected as we didnt want to be doing anything wrong. nothing was said to us by the woman we saw in jobcentre about sitation. with him loosing job him moving in never happened and yeah i was heartbroken!
have we been really doing something wrong? am i going to loose all my benefits and be considered a benefit cheat when ive basically stuck to what im told?!

i have to go into council offices on monday to discuss this appeal i made which im wondering they having me there under false pretences and dwp coming on thursday which is a livetime away!
any advice would be much appreciated please

Mupette

If you are not reliying on him finacially and are not linked finacially, and he pays council tax or perm address else where then really there is nothing to get stressed about.

If if is someone making false alligations on you then they will be found out.

Just because your partner stays over to help, isn't he more of a carer for your autistic child?

I think i read on a thread here somewhere that if he buys you shopping and cooks for you then (and vice versa) thats where the problem starts, because he will then be contibuting to the household, including paying any of your bills for you.

If he is staying over to help your son, and a bit of nookie then stop worrying.

It's the weekend don't dwell on it.

bumble3130

hi there thanks for your reply.
i suppose in a small way he could be classed as a carer as he will sit in the house with my son if i have to go to the shops. its near impossible for me to go shopping with my son on my own.
we do have dinner together as when hes here i consider him a guest so if we eat i find it rude not to offer him anything. and hes cooked for me on special occasions when we cant go out.
lol thanks your right - it is the weekend ill try let this pass over me until the day comes

Stressed_and_Skint

I swear they deliberately make these announcements, letters etc just before the weekend to give you something to worry about, its always the people who have done nothing wrong who end up worrying, i understand exactly how you feel, if you truly have done nothing wrong, then all will be well. Tell them about this malicious ex also.

Fire_Fox

Just get together as much proof as you can that your boyfriend permanently lives elsewhere, any bank statements, council tax bills with his name on, ring the council and ask for his number on the electoral roll etc. Presumably his brother is declaring the extra income to the inland revenue under the rent-a-room scheme? More evidence.

welshmoneylover

Are you claiming as a single parent?

If your boyfriend stays wed, friday saturday and sunday and a whole week over christmas it sounds to me as if you are not living as a single parent but as someone who is in a committed relationship.

Good luck with that one!

ps, don't think compliance officers were born yesterday. They are VERY experienced in dealing with this sort of thing!

bumble3130

welshmoneylover,

i did state occasionally a sunday and its not very often. yes im in a committed relationship with him as i love him as i want to spend the rest of my life with him - that doesnt mean we are living together!
i am a single parent - i bring my son up by myself as i have done for 7 years! having a boyfriend doesnt outrule me from being a single parent

p.s - i never declared i thought compliance officers were born yesterday and am in no shape way or form trying to hide anything. i am simply just asking for a bit of advice!

DaisyFlower

You clearly see yourself as a couple as you refer to him as your OH in another post.

If he stays over half the week and only has an address for post then they will most likely see you as a couple. If he lives at his brothers why would he not have that as his registered address?

From your post its only your benefits stopping you moving in together and they may pick up on that.

As a side note, if he stays half the week he should be contributing to the household.

Vader123

my bf does stay and with my son being mildly autistic and works well on routines we keep the overnight stays to the same nights. wed, fri and sat... occasionally he has stayed a sunday too and over xmas he stayed for a week

No where else but the benefits world would you have someone staying over between 3 and 4 nights a week and not expect a contribution!

Unless the its the tax payers!

OP, you are clearly in a relationship and refer to him as your "other half".

Only benefit entitlement stops you from a)moving in together and b) admitting you are in a relationship and not single.

The compliance offer will see through all this.

Vader

fairydiamond

bumble3130 wrote: »

i am a single parent - i bring my son up by myself as i have done for 7 years! having a boyfriend doesnt outrule me from being a single parent

I don't understand this attitude though, you are getting married but you say you are a single parent... you either have the single life or not, you can't get married but expect to be classed as a single parent...!

I really don't mean to cause offence, I just don't understand people when they say this.

missmontana

Vader123 wrote: »

No where else but the benefits world would you have someone staying over between 3 and 4 nights a week and not expect a contribution!

Unless the its the tax payers!

OP, you are clearly in a relationship and refer to him as your "other half".

Only benefit entitlement stops you from a)moving in together and b) admitting you are in a relationship and not single.

The compliance offer will see through all this.

Vader

Like I've said before, I previously had a bf, who stayed over 2-3 nights a week, yes we were in a relationship but I was still a single parent as were were NOT LIVING TOGETHER.
I never asked him to contribute anything as he would pay if we went out anywhere.