Buying together - what to do?

nomnomnom

Nixer wrote: »

but I can't see why the idea of having kids in general when you aren't married (and possibly never intend to marry) is still such a jaw dropper for some people in this day and age.

Agreed. Some people just don't want to get married, myself and my partner don't although we went through IVF to have children together and that's commitment

I feel this thread is becoming some sort of relationship counselling for the OP and it's silly. Everyone has disagreements, it doesn't mean you aren't right for each other. As Katie kat kins says, get proper legal advice on this, not just from a forum.

chewmylegoff

my view is that if you're going to buy a house together with a joint mortgage, and you're in a position to both contribute towards it equally, which it seems you are, then you should.

personally, if i were your OH, i would expect you to sell your flat, and put down an equal deposit with me - if you couldn't afford it then that's different, but where you can then i think it makes sense to split things equally. why should you get the benefit of his deposit (i.e. lower mortgage repayments) without putting any equity into the property yourself? it doesn't make any sense to me. if i was in this situation, and my OH said to me that she wasn't prepared to contribute to the deposit when she could afford to do so, i wouldn't have her on the mortgage at all, i would ask her to continue paying rent.

think his families opinion that you should be paying him more on the basis that you are saving mortgage payments by renting your place out is !!!!!!. ignore them.

as to others implying that as you aren't getting married you aren't properly committed to each other - this is bollox. get out of the C19th. a marriage certificate is far easier to walk away from than a mortgage.