Fabulous New Fashion chat - Dressed up or Down - Everyone Welcome!!

daisybella

I love you girls, really I do.

I've suddenly lost my words, but thank you for sharing your stories and generally being reassuring

xxvickixx

Lost that supermarket comment made me laugh out loud!
Alex, as much as it used to infuriate me when other people said it to me...
I was exactly the same at your age. I loved my holidays, lie ins and enormous disposable income right up until 3 years ago I was adamant that we would never have children. I honestly think if Dh hadn't gotten really, really broody I wouldn't have changed my mind though.
I can see the appeal still in being childless but I'd not change things for the world now.

tara747

lostinrates wrote: »

I'm coming to terms with it. we've considered alternatives, but what I really wanted was not A child, but DH's baby. We decided very early we wanted no medical intervention to make this possible: i feel very strongly that if my health has prevented me from motherhood it is a flaw that should not be ignored: if I were an animal I wouldn't breed from me. My joking suggestion he have an affaire went down like a tonne of bricks though :rotfl: There are choices: you can go screwy with the what ifs and the pressures or you can do your best to come to terms with it if it comes to it. (I admit to getting very hopeful with late periods occasionally).

Life with out children is not wholly bad, not at all. DH and I can spend all day in bed (having done the animals) and we can stay out late without worrying about babysitters. We'll never have to go to *shudder* cartoons at the cinema, or disney, or have the blaring sound of ''ceebeebies'' on in the background. We can borrow friends kids to love and cuddle and spoil, and retain moral superiority of never having a ''Dylan in the supermarket when tired and hungry'' moment (which i don't believe any parent never has). In every life there are clouds, we just have to keep searching for the silver linings....the alternative is to stand glumly in the rain, and I've always preferred jumping in puddles.

Anyway, I'm exhausted to day just carrying around normal hormonal boobs I think ones full of milk might require me to invest in a wheelbarrow.

What a great post, and a lovely philosophical point of view. Most of us don't know whether we're able to have a baby or not, and I don't feel broody atm, but who knows if that will change, and whether we would be able to if we wanted to? I'm with you LIR, one must enjoy life and make it as full as possible - nobody knows what is around the corner.

p.s. LOL at the supermarket comment!!!!!!!!!!!

lostinrates

xxvickixx wrote: »

Lost that supermarket comment made me laugh out loud!.

Good! i did wonder if it were too soon :D

piratefairy

I agree, LiR / tara.. i think i now believe in the if / when something happens it should be because it is meant to be..
i was really messed up last yr, had a m/c with the ex..which was probably the beginning of the end based on how much i let it affect me..completely unplanned and would have turned our worlds upside down and i realise now would certainly not have held us together..so things usually turn out for the best whether you think so at the time or not..meh..sorry if this makes not much sense due to being a bit rambly, but nobody knows, i haven't talked baout it..

daisybella

(((pf))) I want to give you a really big hug now.

Alexnikov

xxvickixx wrote: »

Lost that supermarket comment made me laugh out loud!
Alex, as much as it used to infuriate me when other people said it to me...
I was exactly the same at your age. I loved my holidays, lie ins and enormous disposable income right up until 3 years ago I was adamant that we would never have children. I honestly think if Dh hadn't gotten really, really broody I wouldn't have changed my mind though.
I can see the appeal still in being childless but I'd not change things for the world now.

It doesn't bother me when people say it - my mum was apparently exactly the same till she hit 30. I just think of the things that put me off it and it's not the lie ins and being able to spend my money on me, it's more the fact that I've never had any contact with children younger than about 8 and babies quite frankly terrify me. The thought of being pregnant and having something grow inside me really does revolt me. And also, not sure if I should even admit this, but I have a bad temper and I would be afraid of losing it Plus I am a person who really needs my own space at times and I know full well I couldn't cope with always being on call.

Perhaps if I'm ever in a proper relationship I might change my mind but seeing as I don't really foresee that in my future either, it's not something I think too much about.

piratefairy

thanks db..i think i'm ok abotu it now, i do realise that it would have been the worst thing ever..well, probably..

Alexnikov

Oh Char *massive hugs*

lostinrates

piratefairy wrote: »

thanks db..i think i'm ok abotu it now, i do realise that it would have been the worst thing ever..well, probably..

It would have been different.

As it is you have the now you do. And I think the future you could have is exciting....:)