Girlfriend moving in

Kyrae

I think the fairest thing to do would be ask your girlfriend to pay half the bills and council tax, and not ask her to contribute to the mortgage or pay rent etc. Afterall, you're already living in the house so must be able to afford to pay your mortgage without her help, the only costs going up from her moving in will be the bills and council tax. Instead of paying you rent, she can put the money into a savings account and start saving up for a deposit on a house you can buy together!

slscarborough

I would definately get legal advice on this one.

The only experience I have is of my mother in law who went through an ordeal after her daughter/son in law and grandkids moved in.

They had the arrangement that the son in law would put so much into her bank account each month to cover there share of the bills. However when my mother in law fell out with the son in law she was forced to leave the house as he made it unbearable to live there.

He is at present making a claim on the house and it looks like he may be entitled to a substantial pay out. They lived in the house for a year whilst the mother in law had to rent elsewhere and left the house in an awful mess when they left.

She is now left with a house she cant afford to repair, solicitors fees whilst fighting them in court and a considerable amount of debt whilst paying both a mortgage and rent for a year.

OuterNet

I think an agreement is a good idea. Like a rental agreement.

If anything did go wrong down the line, what would her rights be? Could you just tell her to leave at any time, because its your house (I'm sure she trusts you that you wouldn't do that) but I think rather than looking at it as just a question of who owns the house, it would be good to discuss the whole thing together so that you both have a chance to put your point of view, and then get your agreement drawn up so that you both feel that its fair.

For example, as long as she pays rent she can live in the flat, if you want her to leave you have to give notice, if she leaves she gives you notice etc, what if one of you isn't working?

Look at this as getting your financial arrangements in place in writing rather than about not being trusting. I know things might not work out like this in reality, but at least you have had a chance to agree it from the start. And good luck, hope you will be very happy living together. :beer:

Person_one

While I completely believe in protecting yourself financially in a relationship, I do think its sad that so many partners (male and female) are basically choosing between living with a partner and working towards their own deposits/homes.

If one half of a couple already owns a house that they (sensibly) don't want to share ownership of, then the non home owning partner has to be satisfied with staying off the property ladder either until they split up or they buy together.

I know she'll only be paying what she might have been paying in rent anyway, but what if she didn't want to rent? What if got savings and is ready to buy somewhere or would have been happy to buy with the boyfriend? But now she has to put that off and throw her money away for a bit longer for the sake of the relationship.

I don't think there's anyway around it but I bet there's quite a few people in that situation.

mlz1413

Person_one wrote: »

While I completely believe in protecting yourself financially in a relationship, I do think its sad that so many partners (male and female) are basically choosing between living with a partner and working towards their own deposits/homes.

If one half of a couple already owns a house that they (sensibly) don't want to share ownership of, then the non home owning partner has to be satisfied with staying off the property ladder either until they split up or they buy together.

I know she'll only be paying what she might have been paying in rent anyway, but what if she didn't want to rent? What if got savings and is ready to buy somewhere or would have been happy to buy with the boyfriend? But now she has to put that off and throw her money away for a bit longer for the sake of the relationship.

I don't think there's anyway around it but I bet there's quite a few people in that situation.

Surely if the non home owner felt that strongly then as they could buy a house/flat of their own, they would either have to rent it out for economic reasons or insist they move as a couple into it and then receive rent from partner.

The only way someone would be 'throwing' their money away would be if they can live else where for free or considerable less, which tends to be with parents.

vonManstein43

i happen to know 2 people at work who have had girlfriends move into their house which they had owned previously and when the relationship had broken down both had to pay substantial amounts to the ex partner even though they were not on the mortgage.

be very careful indeed

Running_Horse

Crikey. The nerve of some people. If I had tried to charge my future wife rent, I doubt she would have become my future wife. It's called trust, and if you don't have it, don't let her move in.

But as we're being silly here, he could rent a mansion but pretend he's buying it. Then get involved with all the gold diggers someone mentioned, see exactly what they are prepared to do for some equity, before dumping them and going to live safely in a monastery.

Person_one

mlz1413 wrote: »

Surely if the non home owner felt that strongly then as they could buy a house/flat of their own, they would either have to rent it out for economic reasons or insist they move as a couple into it and then receive rent from partner.

The only way someone would be 'throwing' their money away would be if they can live else where for free or considerable less, which tends to be with parents.

Buying a place to rent out is a bit more complicate than getting your own place to live in, it has tax implications and requires the owner to become a landlord. I'm sure most on this board wouldn't recommend becoming an accidental amateur landlord just to get on the property ladder!

When I said 'throwing their money away' I meant that they would be paying rent which could otherwise have gone towards paying off a mortgage. I realise that early mortgage payments are mostly interest anyway but surely its better to get started as early as possible in order to be mortgage free as young as possible. People delaying this to live with a home owning partner are putting their own financial interests on the backburner for the sake of the relationship.

Like I said, there os probably not an answer to it, but I am glad that neither OH or I already had property when we met, it seems to complicate things and I'd hate the idea of being a 'lodger' when I am in fact sharing a home with someone I love.

mlz1413

Person_one wrote: »

Buying a place to rent out is a bit more complicate than getting your own place to live in, it has tax implications and requires the owner to become a landlord. I'm sure most on this board wouldn't recommend becoming an accidental amateur landlord just to get on the property ladder! i agree with your sentiment but would like to say if someone was buying to rent then they shouldn't be an accidental landlord.

When I said 'throwing their money away' I meant that they would be paying rent which could otherwise have gone towards paying off a mortgage. I realise that early mortgage payments are mostly interest anyway but surely its better to get started as early as possible in order to be mortgage free as young as possible. People delaying this to live with a home owning partner are putting their own financial interests on the backburner for the sake of the relationship.

Like I said, there os probably not an answer to it, but I am glad that neither OH or I already had property when we met, it seems to complicate things and I'd hate the idea of being a 'lodger' when I am in fact sharing a home with someone I love.

I guess if someone lives forever in their partner's house then the money could be considered wasted. But I think anyone doing that long term must be happy with the situation.

I assumed most couples would move home and change the financial arrangments at that point.

Batchy

If you have serious concerns, then call it off.

If you just want a lay, pay for it, if you want to keep her greedy mits off your cash, give her a rent book. (im being serious) this was the legal advice given as to what a co worker should have done, and didn't! Eventually, it cost her half the equity in the house. and he was only there for 1/4 of the time she owned the house.

Next time she would...

although she thought it ridiculous at the time.

good luck...