May have to give up work!

boredandundecided

Just looking for some advice really. I currently work part time and a family member looks after DS (free of charge). I am increasingly worried that said family member is struggling to look after DS. He's not a handful but at almost 2 you can imagine the energy needed to look after him and he doesn't sleep in the day either. He is really a good boy but obviously at that age he needs someone who can run around with him all day and I can see that their heart isn't in it anymore and it's wearing them down which isn't good as there's a long mental health issue. My family member hasn't said anything yet but i'm scared that they will very soon and I don't know what I will do. I only went back to work as the childcare will be free otherwise I wouldn't have been able to afford to go back. If I don't work then I know I will get some more tax credits but obviously not enough to cover my loss in wages. OH is only taking minimum wage at the moment due to business sortage and there's no way on earth we can manage on his wage. We area already in a few thousand debt and are struggling to keep up with daily living expenses and now just a little scared of what could happen.

Has anyone given up work in these circumstances or something similar and coped OK. We do everything in our power to cut down and we have cut down to the lowest we can go and are just keeping our head above water but this will surely knock us for six.

Thanks guys x

Counting_Pennies_2

How about putting your little one in a nursery for half a day a couple of days a week.

We have a nursery local to here who take children from two and charge £12 per session.

I know it might seem a lot, but cheaper than any other child care, and that might give the family member a break. Then when they become 3 there will be entitlement to free half day child care every day of the week, so maybe try dangling the carrot of these few hours off each day. Better than having to give up completely.

Have a look into it. There should be a childrens information service attached to your council who will give you details of all day care.

You could even look into a childminder for a couple of half days. They end up costing very little per hour.

This might just keep her hanging on!

jopsey

would you not be eligible for help with childcare from Tax credits ?

Counting_Pennies_2

PS - you can also get childcare vouchers to help pay towards the nursery fee through your salary.

boredandundecided

Thank you for your replies. I do currently get tax credits but like most people they're never enough to live on. DS has his name down to start nursery when he's two but that's not for another 4 months, it will be for 2 half days when i'm at work so it will definately help and I will be paying with the childcare vouchers (thanks for the reminder, will sort that out tomorrow). Just hope they can cope until then. Just trying to get my head round money issues as we have nowhere near enough to live on at the moment without childcare costs. Talk about make you feel dizzy! I was freaking out about the nursery costs which are £7 per session twice a week but will deal with that when it comes, coping day by day at the moment! Thank you x

bertiebots

jopsey wrote: »

would you not be eligible for help with childcare from Tax credits ?

Was just going to say that too:D Have you had a look at the old style board for tips on cutting back ,grocery budgets and other things. Its a really helpful board and there are lots of people on here with very tight budgets. Never say never;) there might just be something you havent thaught of yet:). As for your little one and the carer , maybe its time to have a chat and find out for sure.
We manage on one income with 3 kids and a £50 pw food budget x

PasturesNew

Before all this Tax Credits stuff, couples would often work different hours so they didn't need childcare. Could you get an evening/weekend job instead?

I knew a couple who had a baby, but she never returned to work and didn't drive (wanted to be chauffeured about). They lived 10 miles out of town. Her husband worked 7am to 4pm on the railways, went to his mother's for tea, went to a factory job in the evening from 6-9pm and got home at 10pm. When weekend overtime work was offered, he'd also take that - it was available most weekends. That's extreme (because the wife was a lazy 4rse), but it paid their bills on a 2-up-2-down. In an ideal world SHE'd be doing the evening shift at the factory ... which would have prevented him meeting somebody there and leaving his wife for the new bint.

littlemissmoney

boredandundecided wrote: »

I do currently get tax credits but like most people they're never enough to live on.

As your childcare costs increase, your tax credits increase too. Play around with this website, putting in different scenarios:
www.entitledto.co.uk

You might find paying for childcare costs less than you might think.

littlemissmoney

If your husband is on the min wage could he give up his job to look after your DS during the day (and maybe get an evening/weekend job)?

mark55man

I also think if you sense that your carer is having difficulties the right thing to do would be to raise the topic pretty soon. However much it complicates your life (and a bit of research into the options posted above would make that clear), and take care not to make them feel guilty about not doing it anymore - people can be very sensitive when they are no longer able to help - even when that help is imposing a strain on them.

you might ask if the family member would be happy with once a week or to help out in an emergency - both would be useful to you and would make them feel better

MrsTinks

littlemiss beat me to it... if you earn more than min wage per hour then it would make more sense for your OH to do the childcare...
I know we're fortunate that both DH and I earn over minimum (by a bit) but no matter what you earn it's never enough Especially when small people come along LOL
IF you find that it's too expensive to work and pay for childcare have you thought about becoming a registered childminder? Mine is cheap for this area but an absolute gem! (seriously - i haven't met another I'd feel as comfy leaving my daughter with!) and she charges £3.60 per hour - she has one small one (DD) under 12 months, a couple of toddlers/young kids part time and some older kids before and after school. I know at times she has a few more than others but her oldest daughter is fully qualified and registered as her assistant and has worked in a nursery and has all her diplomas too.
I'm not saying have as many kids as she has (all within OFSTED regs and registered etc) but 2 kids in addition to yours and you'd be able to earn a half decent living