Bedtime for young children

amy_lou_4

Purely conjecture, but perhaps the grandparents themselves don't even agree with the late bedtimes, but have no choice as that is the pattern their parents have put them into? If you spoke to them about the noise late on, it might act as a catalyst for them to discuss earlier bed times with the children's parents (in an ideal world...)

jcr16

My children are 21 m, 4 yrs and 6yrs.

the bed time is as follows youngest in bed at half 6, usually alseep within sec's before i've even left the room. older 2 in bed by 7. the time between 6.30 and 7 is used for quiet ( no tv) readin, bedtime stories and a hot chocolate. My 4 yr old prob takes about 5 mins no more to fall alseep and my 6 yr old, is asleep within 10 mins. they all then sleep till 6/7am. In the day my 21m old will have a nap anything from half hour to 2 hours. but he still has no trouble in crashing at half 6.

Weekends they go to bed about half hour later and are allowed a dvd as a reward in bed.

My kids don't function properly without a bed time routine. They thrive on a routine. But what works for one family may not work for others.

digitalphase

mspig wrote: »

could be worse they could be playing loud music or having parties all the time - i'll take the noisy toddlers anytime.

They do play loud music all the time, alongside the noisy toddlers.

It's interesting getting other people's views. There are of course no rules on parenting, so I suppose a lot of us go on how we were brought up.

I personally think that children need structure from an early age, so if I have children, they will go to bed at least a few hours before me. Then I can spend time with my partner.
I think at least the hour before bedtime should be spent winding down, i.e. bedtime story or bathtime.

It's interesting that on the 'Supernanny' programs, a lot of the children's issues stem from having no routine/structure i.e. no set bedtimes and children dictating when they want to go to bed. Once they receive this structure from their parents they are happier, and the parents are happier.

As I said before, I do not have children at the moment. But I have a good idea how I'd bring them up if/when I do

bestpud

I think bedtime routines are down to individual families tbh, especially at that age as many don't need to get up early in the morning.

My personal opinion is bedtime has two elements: routine and getting the right amount of sleep to meet individual needs.

It seems they may have a routine, albeit a later one than many, and we don't know when they get up, or how much sleep they need, so can't say for sure they aren't meeting both these requirements iyswim?

However, they should not be disturbing others and that is the bit I'd object to!

milliebear00001

digitalphase wrote: »

They do play loud music all the time, alongside the noisy toddlers.

It's interesting getting other people's views. There are of course no rules on parenting, so I suppose a lot of us go on how we were brought up.

I personally think that children need structure from an early age, so if I have children, they will go to bed at least a few hours before me. Then I can spend time with my partner.
I think at least the hour before bedtime should be spent winding down, i.e. bedtime story or bathtime.

It's interesting that on the 'Supernanny' programs, a lot of the children's issues stem from having no routine/structure i.e. no set bedtimes and children dictating when they want to go to bed. Once they receive this structure from their parents they are happier, and the parents are happier.

As I said before, I do not have children at the moment. But I have a good idea how I'd bring them up if/when I do

But what makes you think the children lack structure? There is a difference between having structure and going to bed early. Clearly, you would choose to bring up your own children differently, but that doesn't mean your way would work in every family or for every child.

Is your problem the noise, or your disapproval of how they bring up their children/grandchildren? If it's the former, you should (obviously I'd have thought) speak with your neighbour. If it's the latter, I'm not sure what response to give. There isn't a 'right' way to bring up children. Only a multitude of ways that work for different families - despite what 'Supernanny' may have you believe!

bestpud

digitalphase wrote: »

As I said before, I do not have children at the moment. But I have a good idea how I'd bring them up if/when I do

Lol, we all had those good ideas! Some you stick to and others you quickly realise aren't as important as you thought they would be.

Well that's my experience anyway!

tandraig

well digitalphase - I too thought that my kids would be in bed at set hours like I was! unfortunately, they had other ideas! my daughter was a 'night owl' and was happy and lively during the evening until about 11pm or midnight - and even if i forced the issue and she had to go to bed - wouldnt sleep! even when she was in school - she still stayed up later than me!
no1 son was easier - crashed at 8.00 mostly!
no2 son - oh god - that child didnt need sleep at all! to make it worse he was hyperactive and had severe asthma!
so - the best laid plans of would-be parents go out the window sometimes - and not through any fault of the parent!

Threebabes

My girls 9 and 6 go to bed at 8, the 9 yr old especially needs a lot of sleep. My 14 yr old goes to bed at 9.30 and on the odd school night 10, he stays up a bit later on a weekend and so does the girls.

I like my kids in bed at a decent time, they need their sleep. When they were younger I liked them in bed by 7.30/8pm I'd had enough by then and was ready for a sit down in peace.

daska

digitalphase wrote: »

As I said before, I do not have children at the moment. But I have a good idea how I'd bring them up if/when I do

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

As my dad says: "I used to have ideas, then I had children"

Suggest you have the children then come back and comment. Every family is different. DS1 had a good routine with a 7pm bedtime. 10 years later, DS2 arrived and he had a good routine with a 10pm bedtime, it was the correct routine for us and him because he hated eating alone and wouldn't sleep more than 6 hours. We'd not have benefited in any way by putting him to bed at 7 because the older children were still up, so instead we got a good night's sleep and had a lazier morning and everyone was very much more relaxed.

Dontknowanymore

My baby (9.5 months) goes to bed sometimes as early as 5pm these days, been trying to stretch it until 6pm but most nights it's no later than 5.30pm.
My 5 year old goes about 7pm, they both sleep at least 12/13 hours.
Yet my neighbours twins who are 2 days older than the baby, go down at aout 9pm and wake at 6am, everyone is different, some kids need loads of sleep, some dont.