Sick and Tired of being in Debt!

theoretica

Why can't you survive on £70 this month? It seems you aren't spending it on food or transport to work?

Bluntly I think I may have an idea why you are in debt, because I don't see what else you absolutely need to spend money on?

AJLondon

I am sure I can survive.. The reason I have said about that is because I think I will have additional charges hitting my account for this month where my OD was at 5650.00 as it gets charged as the ultimate reward account comes with 300.00 interest free overdraft... after that anything from 300.01 - 2,500 OD is charged at 1.00 per day and 2,500.01-5650.00 is charged at 2.00 per day..

If these charges come out then I could be into an overdraft that i no longer have and the cost is 5.00 per day....

I have closed and permanently excluded myself from the gambling site i was on.. I am never doing that again if that is what you were thinking...

theoretica

So- if I am correct you have 105 or so in your account (I have different ideas of exchange rates to you), 50 in your pocket, owe your OH 81 and probably have overdraft fees of up to 62.
You give the 50 from your pocket to your OH and 31 from your account. You then ask the bank to confirm the overdraft fees - and have about 12 to live on. I repeat the question- what do you need to spend any money at all on? Even if you need to feed yourself for the month on 12 the Old Style board might well help you do it!

I know I am being harsh- but I think you can do it.

katieclampet

Do you usually gamble with such a large amount of money? I just wondered whether you need to address this issue, as well as dealing with your debts.

katiex

AJLondon

Hi Kaite

Thats the thing no I don't.. I just started off with a small amount that turned into a bigger amount that i then put more and more in to try and get back what I started with and should never of touched it in the first place....

Not proud of what I did... as I have said was my darkest day...added to that when my wages went into my account and still had a 0 available balance.. thats when everything hit home....

planning_ahead_2

OMG - just caught up with your thread and am totally gobsmacked.

The one positive thing that came out of the last few days is that you managed to clear your debt with your parents.

I know you are worrying about the debt and want to know what to do to get out of the situation you are in. However, if you had really had that LBM then I don't think you could ever have considered going on to a gambling site. You would have paid off the the overdraft, your parents and £1,100 off your CC - not £800. You still kept some of the loan money for yourself even though it was payday. Once you really do have the LBM then everything in your life changes gear and every penny, every little thing (including watching the energy meters, saving on shopping, re-using where possible etc) matters and you will do everything you can to bring your debt free date even one day closer.

I will just qualify the not going on gambling sites as I know that some folks on here do 'gamble' by match betting - so I don't think that sort of gambling counts.

I don't have a clue where you should go from here, but keep posting and I am certain you will continue to get good advice. The important thing is whether you choose to take it or not. Personally, I'm not convinced you have had your LBM yet.

skintas_2

i gamble i got on online bingo about ten pounds this usally lasts me 3 months, i play the 10p games have wonback £200 before that went stright on bills

AJLondon

planning_ahead wrote: »

OMG - just caught up with your thread and am totally gobsmacked.

The one positive thing that came out of the last few days is that you managed to clear your debt with your parents.

I know you are worrying about the debt and want to know what to do to get out of the situation you are in. However, if you had really had that LBM then I don't think you could ever have considered going on to a gambling site. You would have paid off the the overdraft, your parents and £1,100 off your CC - not £800. You still kept some of the loan money for yourself even though it was payday. Once you really do have the LBM then everything in your life changes gear and every penny, every little thing (including watching the energy meters, saving on shopping, re-using where possible etc) matters and you will do everything you can to bring your debt free date even one day closer.

I will just qualify the not going on gambling sites as I know that some folks on here do 'gamble' by match betting - so I don't think that sort of gambling counts.

I don't have a clue where you should go from here, but keep posting and I am certain you will continue to get good advice. The important thing is whether you choose to take it or not. Personally, I'm not convinced you have had your LBM yet.

I know what you are saying, I guess time and time again I thought its ok, will take another loan out, or top up my existing ones, or put stuff on my card and come up with a plan to pay it off. I now have 3 loans and a credit card and 70.00 to live on.

Like I said to the Bank yesterday.. I have been in debt most of my adult life and I am now 35.. I have done nothing about it but paper over the cracks thinking i can sort it out and look where it has got me.

I have no excuses for last Friday and looking at my online bank statement of recent transactions for that day just goes to show me how much of a mug and an idiot I have been.. All that money thrown away. I still can't believe I have ever let myself get into this mess.

When my wages went into my account and they said I was still overdrawn over 2,000 and had no money available in my account then thats enough of a wake-up call and LBM that I will ever need!

I am humiliated, ashamed, embarrassed, angry and feel the lowest I have ever felt when it comes to my money... thats why I am on here...

You see, I have never been one to talk about money with anyone. I only faced up the problem initially when I was about 20. My folks had a credit report sent to them and my debts were listed in black and white.. had to explain it all to them..

But never really learn't from that and still kept things bottled up. I have upset my OH twice over my loan and the fact that I haven't be trustworthy when it comes to money...

I am sitting here now in our new place, loving our life together and our new home skint and I can't honestly believe what a mess I have got myself in.

So believe it or not, I HAVE HAD my LBM and thats why I am here...

velrist

It might be an idea to post a full SOA on here and a list of your current debts/limits and APRs.

How long do you have until your next payday?

There are threads on here by people who have lived on a lot less than £70 for the month. I think one poster managed to make £3.70 last almost 2 weeks!

I've been there with the debt consolidation route and it's not usually the best route to take as invariably you end up in more debt than before.

You will be able to recover from this but it's likely to be a hard slog, especially over the next few months.

Make sure you talk to your bank about your concerns about overdraft charges causing you to go overdrawn again and see if they can assist with stopping this situation from getting worse with a temporary overdraft until your next wage goes through or something similar.

Seriously an SOA will let people see things in more detail and might be able to offer more suggestions.

Good luck

smartpicture

I think you're starting to see the light, but there still needs to be a slight adjustment! Your traditional mindset has always been to look for an external solution - another loan, a credit card, consolidating your debts, whatever. All that does is perpetuate your debts. Believe it or not, if you can't get any more loans or credit cards, that would actually be the best thing that could happen to you.

It forces you to address the problem from the other angle, of reducing your spending - rather than trying to find new ingenious ways of funding it! (like gambling, which I pray you've learned now is not the answer).

Forget about wanting to buy an engagement ring for now - believe me, what your girlfriend wants far, far more than a ring, is a boyfriend she can trust to take care of his debts and take the right steps for your joint future over a sustained period of time.

So far, you've resisted several entreaties to put up your soa, and multiple requests to explain what you spend your money on apart from the joint bill amount. Honestly, to move forward, it's not just that we need to see these things to help you - it's that you need to see these things in black and white to force you to think about exactly what you spend every single penny on. And how that can be reduced going forward. I still get the impression that you're looking for a 'magic wand' solution, rather than the nitty-gritty detailed planning and reduced spending that are required to get what you really, really want.

But you've taken the important first step by posting on here, and everyone wants to help you. You can do it! So persevere with the posting and take it one step at a time.