CSA enjoying the drama but not doing their jobs.

Mips

I write this on behalf of my friend. A victim of domestic abuse.

8 months ago she contacted CSA against his wishes. This is because he refused to pay her anything, he left her with nothing after running up lots of debts in her name whilst he was out of work. They have a 1 year old son.

My friend, expecting it all to be sorted and also believing it may take them a while.. rings up every few months and accepts what they have to say, and is nice to them, thanks them and resigns herself to the fact that she is flat broke and will soon be on benefits.

Anways... I told her to stop being so stupid and to constantly harass the CSA.

So, today she finds out that he has rescheduled payment plans 4 times and the CSA have done this AT HIS REQUEST because they have believed every lie he has spewed out.

The DOE was never put on him, because he told them he is pending a court case with her for fraud (not true, the court case is for ABH because he went too far the last time). Another time the DOE was not put on him because he told them the bank account was frozen...


... She finds out that they can relay every little bit of conversation he has had ( he calls her names, tells lies, is telling them he is going for full custody - not true, he is on probation and has a restraining order) but she is sick of all the drama and hearing all the tit for tat. She just wants money to help her look after her baby and keep the roof over her head.


I will write and complain on her behalf.. but what do I do? WHY are the CSA taking his word for it??!? :eek:

DUTR

Dippychick wrote: »

I write this on behalf of my friend. A victim of domestic abuse.

8 months ago she contacted CSA against his wishes. This is because he refused to pay her anything, he left her with nothing after running up lots of debts in her name whilst he was out of work. They have a 1 year old son.

My friend, expecting it all to be sorted and also believing it may take them a while.. rings up every few months and accepts what they have to say, and is nice to them, thanks them and resigns herself to the fact that she is flat broke and will soon be on benefits.

Anways... I told her to stop being so stupid and to constantly harass the CSA.

So, today she finds out that he has rescheduled payment plans 4 times and the CSA have done this AT HIS REQUEST because they have believed every lie he has spewed out.

The DOE was never put on him, because he told them he is pending a court case with her for fraud (not true, the court case is for ABH because he went too far the last time). Another time the DOE was not put on him because he told them the bank account was frozen...


... She finds out that they can relay every little bit of conversation he has had ( he calls her names, tells lies, is telling them he is going for full custody - not true, he is on probation and has a restraining order) but she is sick of all the drama and hearing all the tit for tat. She just wants money to help her look after her baby and keep the roof over her head.


I will write and complain on her behalf.. but what do I do? WHY are the CSA taking his word for it??!? :eek:

There is a lot (too much information) to which fogs the main outline of the story, in fairness you don't know what the nrp said or didn't say to know if it is lies or not.

Both parties tell lies or exagerate the truth(sometimes) to minimise their responsibilties

Mips

DUTR wrote: »

There is a lot (too much information) to which fogs the main outline of the story, in fairness you don't know what the nrp said or didn't say to know if it is lies or not.

Both parties tell lies or exagerate the truth(sometimes) to minimise their responsibilties

Wrong.

The CSA told her that due to the pending 'fraud' case in court, they have stopped doing the DOE.

They also stopped it another time, because of the frozen bank accounts (due to the fraud court case against her)


There is no fraud case - they gave her the date of the fabricated court date which is the same date he is in court for the violence :rolleyes:

Mips

DUTR wrote: »

You miss the point, the added bits about violence does not add to the desperation of the story, I understand France are now recognising mental bullying upon males, domestic violence works both ways.
Sorry to say this but sometimes some women need a good slap from time to time.
Anyway I digress, what is the main crunch of the situation so far?

Oh I see.. you're just the first one to crawl from under the rock this afternoon :rolleyes:

AnxiousMum

If your friend has this guy in court for ABH on a said date, and CSA believe that it is her that is in court for fraud, she should have a court hearing notice and should send them a copy of this, or give them the case number etc. If it's 'tit for tat' they likely won't get into it, but if she can prove that he's in court that day for ABH, and request that they do start over, and if she is in fact in court, then they should request the same proof of this court appearance from the other party. It's not fair to the 1 yr old son to be made to go without.

But......something doesn't seem quite right with the story - I wonder if you are getting the whole truth? There just seems to be something missing that the CSA would stop actions on a person's word alone.

Mips

AnxiousMum wrote: »

If your friend has this guy in court for ABH on a said date, and CSA believe that it is her that is in court for fraud, she should have a court hearing notice and should send them a copy of this, or give them the case number etc. If it's 'tit for tat' they likely won't get into it, but if she can prove that he's in court that day for ABH, and request that they do start over, and if she is in fact in court, then they should request the same proof of this court appearance from the other party. It's not fair to the 1 yr old son to be made to go without.

But......something doesn't seem quite right with the story - I wonder if you are getting the whole truth? There just seems to be something missing that the CSA would stop actions on a person's word alone.

She is a very close friend. I have been through every step of this with her and this is the absolute truth.

I just don't understand why they are letting him get away with this.

The last woman she spoke to said, that he rings up every day banging on about his rights and is 'very nasty' - I told my friend she doesn't need their opinions of him, or her.. or anything else.. she just wants them to do their job. Nothing more, nothing less.. just their job.

However, this woman now said to my friend she will organise getting a DOE on him today

So they are acting on what my friend says now.. instead of him... why do they take what people say as gospel!

Loopy_Girl

Dippy, is she going to be safe if she starts to get CS? Will this not potentially ignite an already stressed situation?

Btw....ignore the troll on the thread:rolleyes:

Mips

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Dippy, is she going to be safe if she starts to get CS? Will this not potentially ignite an already stressed situation?

Btw....ignore the troll on the thread:rolleyes:

Her whole property has CCTV provided by the domestic violence unit so anything he does to her in the property will be noted - he also has a restraining order, so he is in huge trouble if he goes near her again.

He hasnt been near her since it happened, however, he doesn't want her to have any money whatsoever.

elektra-2007

The only way to get the csa to do anything is too harrass them. She needs to ring up and ask for name of her case worker then find out what hours the caseworker does. She then needs to speak to the case worker and say she wants the maintaince back dating to the first date of contact. If the csa refuse then ask to be put through to appeals and lodge a complaint. Saying the csa can then pay the months that are missed as they havent taken enough action to get this from him. If he is ringing up being abusive then they just wil ban him from phoning. She needs to give them as much info as possible such as address, ni number, place of work, car registration number ect. If after speaking to her caseworker she dosnt feel she is getting anywhere tell her to complain in writing.
You cant do anything as its official buisness. I would leave your friend to deal with this herself as its her buisness and will be somthing going on for the next 16-18yrs.
By all means be there to support her.
If she cant be botherd doing any of this and pursuing it, then she obviously dosnt really want to do it.
Theres a saying you can lead a horse to the water but you cant make them drink!
Good Luck.

xmaslolly76

The CSA kept doing this to me OH was being an complete A R S E at the time and would keep feeding them lines and they would stop it i would then tell them what was actually happening and the whole process would start again. It wasnt until they actually stuck to their guns and started taking £650 a month off him that he came to his senses. He put a private arrangement in place for about half that amount as i wasnt bothered about arrears as long as he helped to support his children.

Loopy_Girl

Dippychick wrote: »

Her whole property has CCTV provided by the domestic violence unit so anything he does to her in the property will be noted - he also has a restraining order, so he is in huge trouble if he goes near her again.

He hasnt been near her since it happened, however, he doesn't want her to have any money whatsoever.

See this would be my concern....of course he should be paying for his child but is it worth £20pw (or even a fiver a week if he's on benefits) for then to be worried at every little noise?

ABH is a pretty nasty charge so he doesn't sound like a nice man so I can see potential for trouble if she starts to get CS...is it REALLY worth it?

I know £80 per month is alot when you are on IS but sometimes there are more important things in life - like your safety....just my thoughts.

I hope she gets everything sorted

*btw, another one has crawled out...ignore also*:rolleyes: