So down, don't know what to do

mrcow

Thumper7 wrote: »

I'm not his dream girl anymore, he was never mine, he came along when I was so so weak (my dad had just died, then my sister took a massive overdose) and I was ready for someome to take care of me.

Reading you advice i'm better of the merry go round, but i've nothihg left

I thnk you've just summed it up completely.

Apart from the "nothing left" bit. You've got everything left - everything there is anyway. Don't be unhappy. This is a turning point - a chance to change things.

Don't beat yourself up (or let others do it to you) about things in the past that you can't change. Concentrate on those things that you can change for the better.

beks

Mely wrote: »

Op...sorry to be harsh but this is karma! You where a mistress once, and now you know what it feels like for your husband to have a mistress too, and cheat on you.

I thanked by mistake!!

Jees, some people! Why bother to put sorry to be harsh and then stab the knife in and twist it?? :mad: OP knows that she did wrong in the past, she was honest enough to put this in her first post. She is obviously distressed and does not need condemnation right now. The past cannot be changed. How about showing support but I guess you have never done anything wrong in your lfe eh? OP ignore people who seem to enjoy making others feel worse.

Mely

emsywoo123 wrote: »

I actually cannot believe you are turning another thread into a "ha ha bash the msitress this is karma" thread. :mad:

This is the first time i have ever mentioned karma...lol.

And i suppose you are going to stand up for mistresses everywhere, even though you realised you where wasting your time in the last thread:rotfl:

You need to calm down, and get some morals!:rolleyes:

Mely

beks wrote: »

I thanked by mistake!!

Jees, some people! Why bother to put sorry to be harsh and then stab the knife in and twist it?? :mad: OP knows that she did wrong in the past, she was honest enough to put this in her first post. She is obviously distressed and does not need condemnation right now. The past cannot be changed. How about showing support but I guess you have never done anything wrong in your lfe eh? OP ignore people who seem to enjoy making others feel worse.

Of course i have done wrong in my life, we all have! But i have never cheated nore gone with a married man. You reap what you sow!
Your another one that needs to calm down:rolleyes:

Debt_Free_Chick

Mely wrote: »

Of course i have done wrong in my life, we all have! But i have never cheated nore gone with a married man. You reap what you sow!
Your another one that needs to calm down:rolleyes:

Dare I suggest that if you understood and recognised that human beings are mere mortals and come complete with all the frailties that that entails, that you might be a more compassionate and empathetic person for it?

You do not really believe that logic and judgement is something that is completely detached from emotion and feeling, do you? Or do you?

beks

Mely wrote: »

Of course i have done wrong in my life, we all have! But i have never cheated nore gone with a married man. You reap what you sow!
Your another one that needs to calm down:rolleyes:

So therefore, things you have done wrong in your life will never be forgiven. Is that what you're saying?
I don't think I need to calm down, I am a perfectly calm person and it takes a lot more than preachers like you to wind me up. I was showing support for the OP who so clearly needs help right now. You obviously have nothing better to do in your life than kick people when they are down, you sad individual. Posts like yours are no help whatsever to anyone. Whether you have or haven't cheated on anyone/gone with a married man is totally irrelevant, I am not interested thank you (btw neither have I but I care for people who are so obviously upset). Of course what she did in the past was wrong and she admits it is her fault but she is looking for help and support. Have a heart.

Pee

Whatever the rights and wrongs of how the relationship started, you are his wife now.

I would suggest that going off sex is a bigger issue than putting on a stone in weight. Do you think the extra weight has caused you to lose interest or was sex always something used in payment for other benefits in a relationship?

Does texting another woman matter? It does to you because you know that he can't be trusted. Maybe, maybe not. You do need to talk to him.

You do need to know that single or with him or with someone else, you have a lot of life worth living, and I hope that you will be very happy.

Primrose

You still have huge chunk of you life left. Start the new year by being positive.

Sort out that flab. Get an exercise video and do some simple sit-ups and other exercises EVERY DAY. Start a diet. YOU CAN BE IN CONTROL OF THIS.
Start looking for a job. Any job will do for starters. Just get yourself back into an environment where you are keeping busy, inter-acting with others and don't have time to feel sorry for yourself. If you can't find a paying job, start out with a voluntary job helping in a charity shop or something.

Don't despair over the issues you can't control at this stage. Deal with the things you CAN control. When you are in a more positive state of mind and feel a little stronger, then it will be time to start thinking of where next to go.

emsywoo123

Mely wrote: »

This is the first time i have ever mentioned karma...lol.

And i suppose you are going to stand up for mistresses everywhere, even though you realised you where wasting your time in the last thread:rotfl:

You need to calm down, and get some morals!:rolleyes:

..........................................

Thumper7

I just want to thank people for their replies and thoughts.

I am going to take the bull by the horns and get myself sorted out.

Thank you all again.