depression

EthelBloggs

Miroslav wrote:

To those I sent lyrics too.........

Verse 1 - beginning of line 3........First word is 'One' not 'Old'

Guessed that :P

From first reading it's a lovely piece.. I can tell it's written from your heart and that will mean more to her than perfect grammar etc.. it's beautiful.. truly and you shouldn't be embarassed or bashful in anyway of your talent

blinky

Tiff wrote:

Hi Paul - come on in, the group is lovely hun. That was courageous of you to post and you were very succinct. You are very welcome angel. We can't give you any medical advice but we can be here for every minute you need us - there's always some kind soul on watch.;) As you may notice, I am the Tiff you've been warned against :rolleyes: :rotfl: - and I do have some thoughts Paul. I will have to post later angel as I'm going out and I've just gone through 30 pages here catching up.:rolleyes:
Be kind to yourself,
Tiff x

Thanks for the kind words - at least you only have 30 pages to catch up some of us have 180+ to catch up on :rolleyes: .

Was a bit stressed and frazzled at work this morning. Spoke to my bosses and laid it on the line how bad it had been over the weekend ( but didn't go as far as saying how close they came to losing me permanently ) and said that I would have to cut back my workload. They were quite sympathetic - initially they said they were happy to cut back my hours to my contracted amount (don't you just love unpaid overtime - time in leiu sounds great but if you cannot get near your contracted hours how can you take time off) but I also said that I wouldn't be able to manage to be productive as I am normally. Again they were sympathetic.

Spoke to my mother when she got in from work. Not surprisingly no support there - don't know why I bother....

The person I had been seeing has text me a couple of times and we are supposed to be meeting up for a drink on Thursday.

So in all it hasn't been a bad day - but now I'm tired I'm in a lot of mental pain and all I want to do is burst into tears

One thing which I didn't post about in the first megapost is my experiences with the NHS. If you are really acutely mentally ill you get sectioned and receive help. For the most G.P.'s skills is limited to dealing out antidepressants, not really their fault they don't have the time or the knowledge. So you get referred to the psychiatric department which may take between 3-12 months for an initial assessment. At which point you may get some further treatment options - these too often have waiting lists. For example I know up here it's an 18 month waiting list for an assessment for any CBT or psychotherapy.

Is it just me or this the wrong way of doing things? By the time you actually get an appointment for some serious treatment you may have recovered enough so they wont help or you've been limping along for a very long time. Remember this can be a serious life threatening illness.

What it also means is that sufferers can look for alternatives for help and not everyone out there has your best interests in mind.

Still feel like turd, in pain

Horasio

Hi Everyone:)

Had a great weekend but feel so tired today - brain just given up

EthelBloggs

:hugs: Paul.. I don't really have anything constructive to say other than maybe focus on the positives and try not to dwell too much on the negatives.

I'm in the same boat in terms of people not even trying to be sympathetic and I have similar workload although mine is of a different nature than yours. Sometimes I just wish I could have a day to myself with no one needing anything and no deadlines to meet.

Seems to me more than anything you need a bloody good rest and to give yourself some TLC.. and I know that's easy for me to say and very difficult for you to do. Now you've spoken to your bosses... see how things go over the next little while and try to be good to yourself

feelinggood_2

Hey CCstar, glad you had a greattime.
We'll catch up tomorrow if you fancy it?
x

Horasio

oakdale_minx wrote:

Today i've been given my first ever anti-depressants, Prozac. I the first one tentatively about 3 hours ago. I went to the Doctor with a viral infection (my neck glands have swollen) and whilst there I was very brave and told him how ive been feeling.......for years really,but particuarly in the last 6 months.

I work for the NHS and know the symptoms of depression. I have a spinal cord injury which happened in 2001 and I could have endedup in a wheelchair but luckily didn't, which I think has speeded up all the other symptoms to put me in a situation where I am scared to socialise, cry over stupid things, don't recognise the person I am becoming,don't like the person I am becoming feel nothing what so ever emotionally and most of all, don't know how to change it......

I told my GP it felt like a mixture of a bit ball of string unravelling in my head GGalong with a man runing around in my head screaming loudly whilst waving his hands. My GP looked a bit concerned and said 'a man????' Not good I guess.....

I'm a bit scared because I've fought asking for help for probably two years now and do feel a bit like i've 'failed' by giving in, but also a bit relieved that I actually did it and have taken that 'step'.

A lot of the rubbish in my life is all in my DFW diary, I won't bore you all with the details.

Apparently the tablets should help feel see in a few weeks just how low I've got. I know how low I am, but the frightening thing is, it feels normal.

Hi and welcome

Great to meet you, just come back from the south and feel homesick again. Still going back to Bournemouth for Christmas:)

I took Prozac and was very nervous. It was very good and helped me through a bad phase.

Sazbo

blinky wrote:

Thanks for the kind words - at least you only have 30 pages to catch up some of us have 180+ to catch up on :rolleyes: .

Was a bit stressed and frazzled at work this morning. Spoke to my bosses and laid it on the line how bad it had been over the weekend ( but didn't go as far as saying how close they came to losing me permanently ) and said that I would have to cut back my workload. They were quite sympathetic - initially they said they were happy to cut back my hours to my contracted amount (don't you just love unpaid overtime - time in leiu sounds great but if you cannot get near your contracted hours how can you take time off) but I also said that I wouldn't be able to manage to be productive as I am normally. Again they were sympathetic.

Spoke to my mother when she got in from work. Not surprisingly no support there - don't know why I bother....

The person I had been seeing has text me a couple of times and we are supposed to be meeting up for a drink on Thursday.

So in all it hasn't been a bad day - but now I'm tired I'm in a lot of mental pain and all I want to do is burst into tears

One thing which I didn't post about in the first megapost is my experiences with the NHS. If you are really acutely mentally ill you get sectioned and receive help. For the most G.P.'s skills is limited to dealing out antidepressants, not really their fault they don't have the time or the knowledge. So you get referred to the psychiatric department which may take between 3-12 months for an initial assessment. At which point you may get some further treatment options - these too often have waiting lists. For example I know up here it's an 18 month waiting list for an assessment for any CBT or psychotherapy.

Is it just me or this the wrong way of doing things? By the time you actually get an appointment for some serious treatment you may have recovered enough so they wont help or you've been limping along for a very long time. Remember this can be a serious life threatening illness.

What it also means is that sufferers can look for alternatives for help and not everyone out there has your best interests in mind.

Still feel like turd, in pain

Hi blinky. Well sounds like there were at least some positives today. You talked things through at work and at least they were sympathetic And all is not lost with the person you're dating.

Yes, going the NHS route is frustratingly slow. It's just a very over-burdened sector - there are a lot of us needing help! But there is the option of going 'private' with counselling, so long as paying isn't an obstacle. But of course, as with everything, it's important to engage counsellors (or any complementary therapists) who are properly accredited. Just my thoughts, not advice.

I find if I don't try and focus too far ahead, then things don't get too overwhelming. We made it to Monday! :j Take care, Saz x

Sazbo

flis21 wrote:

Evening all, sorry I haven't been round for a bit. Looks like even more 'newbies' have joined us. Well you are all welcome (although it is probably a sad sign as to how much depression and mental illness there is around).

OH is at work tonight, not home until about 10.30. I hate the nights he works like this, I just sit here and can't relax and get myself worked up about silly things instead!

Hi flis, good to hear from you. You can always post here if it makes the time pass a bit quicker! Or maybe listen to some music? Hope all's well with you otherwise? Sx

Sazbo

oakdale_minx wrote:

Today i've been given my first ever anti-depressants, Prozac. I the first one tentatively about 3 hours ago. I went to the Doctor with a viral infection (my neck glands have swollen) and whilst there I was very brave and told him how ive been feeling.......for years really,but particuarly in the last 6 months.

I work for the NHS and know the symptoms of depression. I have a spinal cord injury which happened in 2001 and I could have endedup in a wheelchair but luckily didn't, which I think has speeded up all the other symptoms to put me in a situation where I am scared to socialise, cry over stupid things, don't recognise the person I am becoming,don't like the person I am becoming feel nothing what so ever emotionally and most of all, don't know how to change it......

I told my GP it felt like a mixture of a bit ball of string unravelling in my head along with a man runing around in my head screaming loudly whilst waving his hands. My GP looked a bit concerned and said 'a man????' Not good I guess.....

I'm a bit scared because I've fought asking for help for probably two years now and do feel a bit like i've 'failed' by giving in, but also a bit relieved that I actually did it and have taken that 'step'.

A lot of the rubbish in my life is all in my DFW diary, I won't bore you all with the details.

Apparently the tablets should help feel see in a few weeks just how low I've got. I know how low I am, but the frightening thing is, it feels normal.

Hi oakdale, thank you for posting and welcome. First and foremost, you are not a failure asking for help. Someone said to me recently, "You are only ready for things when you are ready for them." And I think that's very true. You asked for help when you were ready to receive it - so yes, it is a 'relief' taking the first step - we wish you well for the next steps. Please feel free to continue posting here, if it helps. There are some truly lovey and supportive people here. Sxxx

regularsaver1

Feel better today - had an informal chat with new manager and said i can have the hours I want and he thinks i will add to the team and people will learn from me and my experience. this branch doesn't come with as much pressue before and sounds like I will be appreciated more