Sallyx's Sink or Swim, Swimerdy Swim Diary ;)

Bunnyinthelights

That is entirely normal sweetheart.
My kids were amazing on holiday (only 1 melt down from DD in 3 weeks!) but spending 3 weeks with DH and DD/DS 24/7 is making me CRAVE some 'me' time!

Can you drop her at your Mom's for a few hours???

sallyx

Not today Bun, we are going there tomorrow and then I am leaving her while I go to Meet R at 5pm. Will be nice to get more than a couple of hours of time out. The only time Ive had away from her Ive been at work generally. Im not complaining its just very full on, I knew it would be but guess it doesn't make it any easier! Dont think ex will be featuring in her life much and will take her so guess I just need to get used to it. Tell you what bless R we were talking about it the other day and he said once he knew her well enough he would be more than happy to look after her and give me some me time....I have to keep pinching myself I tell you!

Bunnyinthelights

Not being funny Sal, he sounds like a really nice guy...but what he also sounds like is what any normal supportive husband/partner is like.

I am not knocking him, I am pointing out what you clearly did NOT get from your XOH. It is also pointing out to me my DH good points because I guess I take for granted a lot of the nice things he does for me!

sallyx

Decided that I really should try and make bea understand a bit more about what it going on, I've told her that daddy won't be staying with us anymore and that while we both love her mummy and daddy aren't going to live together anymore. She was having none of it saying but daddy is going to cone and stay every now and then, he is, he is. Er no he isn't. Lots of tears about daddy not being in our famly anymore! I just want her to understand and not be confused, which she clearly is and I know I've really not helped the situation by letting him stay here.

Oh well have spoken to company about divorce this morning, just need to fill in the paperwork to get ball moving!

Roll on wine o'clock will be much needed this evening!

Keeping_Motivated

Hi Sally just read about helping your daughter understand the separation, have you thought about getting a book to read to her that she might be able to relate to better than an explanation? Such as this one:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Fault-Koko-Bear-Read-Together/dp/0916773477/ref=pd_sim_b_2

there are quite a few books that have a similar theme if you prefer to look around.

Take care

Edit to say this one has good reviews too..

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Two-Everything-Babette-Cole/dp/0099220628/ref=pd_sim_b_3

Bunnyinthelights

What company have you gone with Sal?

Sorry you have had a rough day with all the 'talks'

sallyx

Its just an online one Bunny, £69 and they provide all the paperwork just have to submit it myself. Of course I still have to Pay the court costs ontop which is £340 ish


What a day...Im exhausted

sallyx

Thanks KM I will def look into those books, although might see if the library has any first.

Pooky

I can't remember the book that I read with my eldest when I was going through the whole split and divorce thing but it helped.....She'd just turned 5 so a similar sort of age to B and she could really identify with the characters in the book and often would say something along the lines of..."oh and that happened to ......... in the story too" Very much worth a look in the library to see what they've got.

You're doing the right thing by telling her though, however hard it seems, it's best to be clear and honest all the way through.

Enjoy your wine tonight, sounds like you've deserved it today.

tenmah

sallyx wrote: »

Is it bad to say im really really struggling today...I love Bea dearly but there are times I would just like some time out MUST NOT GRUMBLE, she is the most easy, pleasant and beautiful daughter and I should be grateful

Hi Sal

No it is not bad to say you are struggling. I bought my daughter up on my own - her dad walked out on me when I was pregnant. People do not realise what it is like to be a single parent, it is relentless 24/7 and I never had anyone I could share the burden with. It is only natural to want time out, even now she is 22 and my best friend I still like some me time.