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columbo321

This post is wrong and not written by my mum

bestpud

If you only sold items belonging to you there won't be a problem.

If you bought items to sell on then there might...?

I'm a little confused but it seems as though your son living with you, or not, may be more of an issue than the ebay selling.

Surely, if you are struggling that much, it would be better to lose the SDP and have him at home all the time?

ceecee1

Strangely enough it is good news that a customer compliance officer is coming to see you. That really means that the DWP have not given any allegations made against you enough importance for a full investigation.

No one will have been following you. If fraud have looked at any Ebay trading they have seen that it is not sufficient to interview you formally. They might not even have checked.

It is more than likely that someone will be coming - just to discuss your discuss the responsibilities that you have when claiming benefit and to make sure that you know what you need to tell the DWP.

They might even find out that you are due some extra benefit.

daska

Please stop worrying. They are obliged to investigate allegations of fraud but they know that a proportion of the 'reports' they get are malicious so the fact that they have written to you in no way means that they automatically believe the allegations.

It sounds to me as if you need an advocate. Try contacting the CAB, they should have information as to what's available in your area.

xanthe06

i hope it all goes well for you sounds like you have been having a really bad time of it, try not to worry as it will make your illness worse, x

ceridwen

MY GAWD! You HAVE had a "basinful" to cope with:eek:

I dont know what the position is on this re the DWP - but just to wish you luck with this visit - as you've certainly had/got a heck of a lot to cope with. I'm not at all surprised that you are having problems with depression as well - on top of that lot of physical health problems it would be totally extraordinary if you didnt...

So - just to say hope things work out well for you.

columbo321

Thanks for the advice. My son has just been nagging me to reply now.
Before my sister started feeling ill and got cancer she used to stay with me a few nights or I would stay with her as my son as always gone to his dad's a few nights a week. I cannot afford to lose the SDA. I would have to lose the money and provide for my son and he would be an unpaid carer. I want him to have a life of his own and not have to be my carer 24/7.

bestpud

columbo321 wrote: »

Thanks for the advice. My son has just been nagging me to reply now.
Before my sister started feeling ill and got cancer she used to stay with me a few nights or I would stay with her as my son as always gone to his dad's a few nights a week. I cannot afford to lose the SDA. I would have to lose the money and provide for my son and he would be an unpaid carer. I want him to have a life of his own and not have to be my carer 24/7.

Your son should be receiving loans and grants from uni and that should be enough for him to pay you something for living with you - that's what it is intended for and he isn't paying for digs so has money left over.

He doesn't need to be a full time carer as you manage ok now some nights a week and will carry on doing so.

He can help with things like cleaning as he'd have to do that in his own place anyway.

Anything on top of that you need to accept from social services if you don't want your son to do it.

At the moment you seem to want everything but something is going to have to give I'm afraid.

Your son can get a part time job as he's not at home with you all the time anyway and so being out of the house is not an issue. That is what most uni students do.

Sooo, if you are not having to keep him, the SDA won't matter so much and you can get lots of help/advice with debts and budgeting on these boards.

The ebay selling won't be a problem if it was your stuff that you sold, as I said before. It sounds to me as though you may have bought some clothes and sold them on and that would be more of an issue. Depends how much we are talking about I guess...

Really, you just need to tell the truth and hope all is ok.

But your care/living arrangements need sorting and that is going to mean parting with the SDA and/or accepting help from social services as I see it. At present you are bending the system as far as it will go and eventually it will catch up with you.

fly_dragon_fly

hi love

i had a letter when i first was on benifits and the person just came around asked me a couple of questions if my claim was still what i said it was and to sign a letter confirming it.

dont worry i'm sure its nothing x

dippy3103

Don't panic- compliance normally just confirm that your claim is correct. They may well have had an allegation but don't think it crediable enough to conduct an investigation.
Your sisters boyfreind obviously has a very empty life... don't let his actions be important enough to upset you.
Hope 2010 is better for you.

columbo321

bestpud wrote: »

Your son should be receiving loans and grants from uni and that should be enough for him to pay you something for living with you - that's what it is intended for and he isn't paying for digs so has money left over.

He doesn't need to be a full time carer as you manage ok now some nights a week and will carry on doing so.

He can help with things like cleaning as he'd have to do that in his own place anyway.

Anything on top of that you need to accept from social services if you don't want your son to do it.

At the moment you seem to want everything but something is going to have to give I'm afraid.

Your son can get a part time job as he's not at home with you all the time anyway and so being out of the house is not an issue. That is what most uni students do.

Sooo, if you are not having to keep him, the SDA won't matter so much and you can get lots of help/advice with debts and budgeting on these boards.

The ebay selling won't be a problem if it was your stuff that you sold, as I said before. It sounds to me as though you may have bought some clothes and sold them on and that would be more of an issue. Depends how much we are talking about I guess...

Really, you just need to tell the truth and hope all is ok.

But your care/living arrangements need sorting and that is going to mean parting with the SDA and/or accepting help from social services as I see it. At present you are bending the system as far as it will go and eventually it will catch up with you.

To start with, I have always worked and was a professional photographer with 2 shops before the NHS crippled me when I gave birth. Then they dragged me round the hospital for 4 days until they gave me an x-ray and discovered my pelvis was up near my hips! It took me a year to learn to walk again, but I was left in permanent agony and damaged. I have had to wear a pelvic brace since I was 24 years old. My marriage broke down and I couldn't work and lost my shops. I was also unable to have any more children through the NHS' appalling treatment of me.
My son has had to help me since he was able to walk. Now, it is causing nothing but stress and my son deserved some time of his own. My sister has always helped me , but she has cancer now and obviously can't. At the moment it feels like the bottom has fallen out of my world. I have been in and out of hospital my whole life. I trained as a counsellor 5 years ago and got top marks, but my illnesses and disabilities got worse and then the NHS ripped my nerves in my pelvis when I had an hysterectomy. I haven't had one bit of compensation off the NHS.
As for bending the the system as far as it will go, I think it is the NHS that has bended me as far as I can go. No, I cannot manage on my own at night - I just don't have any choice. I have stayed with my sister last night and my friend the night before because my asthma is bad and the sciatica is extremely bad. I think I deserve some help after what the NHS have done to me. I have never had any help of the Social Services until last year and my doctor is disgusted.
I tried to sue the NHS for 3 years, but they just stuck up for each other.
I cannot afford to give the SDA up, as I won't be able to afford the help I pay for myself. My son has a right to his own life and not to have to look after his mother all his life ( which he has done up until now.) I think I deserve every penny I am entitled to because if it hadn't been for the NHS and their mistakes I would probably have a successful career now.
I have no intention of having the Social Services help me. I have already been in hospital once because they have left me and I am not having any stranger helping me. I had them once and they stole out of my house, threw my dogs outside and smoked in my kitchen! They have neglected me for a whole year, giving me money and then not checking on me when I have begged them for help.
My doctor has told me that my stomach is damaged and my disabilities are getting worse because I am doing things I shouldn't be doing without help.The system as it is stinks. The rules are wrong and mixed up and no one sorts things out.
My sister's schizo boyfriend has been calling here, there and everywhere saying my family has committed fraud and the police and other agencies are sick of it
You obviously don't understand the needs of someone with lots of illnesses and disabilities.Yes, my son would have to clean his own place, but he wouldn't have to help wash and dress his mother, take her to the hospital in the night, remind her to take her medication, do all the cooking and cleaning, watch I don't leave the cooker on, help me in and out of bed, jump up every time I need something, take my pets out, go shopping for me, make MY bed , iron MY clothes and get stressed with me being ill. Be around 24/7. No, he SHOULDN'T have to do that so I had my sister to help me and a friend.
He pays my sister to live with her out of his Uni money and before that he lived in Uni digs, but he had to give them up because they are too expensive and he wants to help me until I get sorted out.