help. Xmas do... suspected of doing DRUGS!!!!!!

Triker

u264047 wrote: »

Hi all,

Just after some advice, had the Office Xmas party on Thursday last week and I was heard SNIFFING in the toilets (i have had a terrible cold all week) anyway, turns out there was the Sales Manager taking a leak at the urinal at the same time I was in there... as i was leaving i said hello etc... and he said "get out of my face" also said he "is no mug, been around the block a few times and knows what I was doing in there"

He obviously hasn't, the only block he's been around is one that should have clumped him on the head to knock some sense into him.

He was unprofessional, rude, judgemental, discourteous and slanderous, stay calm and you'll get your justice.

Paulina_Fortune

I'm sorry to sound a bit negative - but I think that you've had it as far as promotions etc whatever you do. If you get a solicitor/union involved your card is marked and if you don't your card is marked.

If I were in your shoes, I would have a quiet word first with the Manager first thing on Monday morning 'off the record'. It is possible that over the weekend the Manager has realised that he behaved unprofessionally. Be very calm and explain again that you had a cold and have witnesses who will verify this. You do not take drugs full stop and are unhappy with him leaping to conclusions. He did not see you taking any drugs and could not have because you did not do it. Offer to put this behind you, as it appears to have been a misunderstanding. Make it clear that this means that no more is said on the matter by either of you, and that if anyone asks you are both to say that it was a misunderstanding that got out of hand.

By being the better person and allowing the Manager an honorable way out, then you may just avert career disaster. If he accepts this, you will have to be very careful about what you say in the future about the incident and so will he.

If he is stupid enough not to go for this, then if any more is mentioned or the company wants to take it further, then you will need to involve your Union (if you are a member) or an Employment Solicitor. Do not get bullied into resigning your job. If they sack you on hearsay, you will be able to take them to an employment tribunal and win.

Good luck on Monday.

P.S. I suggest that you leave the "rocknroll/loan wolf" image for outside of work, as it is clearly doing you no favours, if this is the conclusion that people jump to. Also learn from this episode and be more careful when out socially with people from work.

bristol_pilot

Paulina, I don't agree. Having a 'quiet word' does not work with bullies. Only a tonne of bricks - the formal route leading to dismissal of this dreadful manager will do. The OP's card might be 'marked' for a year or so after, but will then be forgotton about.

Paulina_Fortune

Hi Bristol Pilot,

I knew my response would not be popular. It is unlikely that he will have enough evidence (or witnesses willing to put their neck on the line) to get this Manager sacked. I also think it is unlikely to blow over if either side is heavy handed about this. I am aware of similar situation where I worked and the person accused of drug taking resigned quietly (instead of fighting it) and then got a job elsewhere. All I said was what I would do in his shoes. I have merely offered a different option for the OP to consider.

michaelvintner

Tell him to go and f*ck himself. He sounds like a grade a w*nker. Report him and his actions to Human Resources or who ever deals with that kind of thing in your company. You cannot go around accusing people of doing things with no evidence.

He is the one who should be sacked for being an idiot. Jumped up little t*sser. He is a Sales Manager for christ sake, remind him that this title does not come with godly powers.

RosaBernicia

Agree the man's a fool.

I would be very wary of doing anything further "off the record" - it just makes things that much harder if the manager causes further unjustified trouble. I'd suggest involving HR immediately and keeping notes of any meeting, even if you decide to very graciously 'let him off' and not pursue a formal grievance. At least that way his card is also marked and he will have to put an end to the current rumours.

(I say this partly because I've dealt with a bullying eejit manager myself, and nothing worked until it got to the point where I had to report it. Seeing the state of him at even the initial discussion meeting was great - he knew that having to explain himself was going to be very difficult and that he was way out of order for it to have got even this far. I didn't make a formal complaint as I'd already found another job and didn't want involvement with a grievance procedure left on my record for no benefit.)

Good luck, I hope you get it sorted soon.

Rosa xx

computershack

Remind him that making accusations which may be believed by others and harm your reputation is known as slander and point out that if he continues, he can have his day in court where he can present the factual evidence that you are. Point out that if he continues to spread these rumours that you will take him for everything he has and is likely to earn in the next several years but finish it off saying "but seeing as you're such an expert and witnessed it with your own eyes and can provide proof, you'll not be worried".

There's always the Lester Burnham classic from American Beauty with a bit of modification...
Lester: Well what do you say I throw in a little sexual harassment charge to boot.
Brad Dupree: Against who?
Lester: Against YOU. Can you prove that you didn't offer to save my job if I let you blow me?

onlyforboards_2

Paulina_Fortune wrote: »

P.S. I suggest that you leave the "rocknroll/loan wolf" image for outside of work, as it is clearly doing you no favours, if this is the conclusion that people jump to. Also learn from this episode and be more careful when out socially with people from work.

What a silly thing to say. Pretending to be just like every one else is more likely to cause problems than going to the toilet on a work night out!
How do you suggest the OP socializes more carefully? If they don't go out with work they are even more of a lone wolf but according to you just going to the toilet is careless!

The manager has been childish and foolish. The only way to deal with it is to be a grown up professional adult and make a formal complaint to ensure the gossip is officially marked as false. Rational people do not assume a person is a drug addict because they sniffed and are slightly different to everyone else! Nor do they gossip about it socially.

Paulina_Fortune

Well that showed me for trying to be helpful. I didn't agree with what other people had posted, but I didn't
criticise anything they had written. I only offered an opinion which clearly on this board I am not allowed to have.

I hope the OP manages to sort this out and I was just offering him a different option.

I'm not going to look at this post again, so go ahead and have a go at me some more. I've only got 22 years experience in business and a good career to offer some advice from.

u264047

Paulina, I appreciate every single person who takes the time to read through this and offer any kind of opinion whatsoever.

I definately find what you said to be just as useful as everyone else. And i'm torn with what to do.. I don't want this to drag on and ruin my Christmas along with my weekend so I'm still in turmoil over what to do.

In response the one above asking if it was an official company party... it was, but not at this point, this was past the free bar cut off and in the early hours.

My image and how i conduct myself in my job definately helps as i need to be somewhat aloof to deal with the amount of pressure that is flung at me every day (I work in production control) everybody who works with me has grown to accept me and the way I am, this particular manager (and the other who stood by his side) have nothing to do with me.