Dilemma re contact - no idea what to do?

daska

Just a quick check... make sure you set your privacy settings so that only friends can see your details and change your profile picture so he can't identify you visually.

elektra-2007

I wouldnt bother with the false account why play games, your kids are getting older if they find out what you have done i.e setting up info ect they may feel sorry for their dad, or if they do it, it would be hard to chastise them ect. I wouldnt bother accepting him as a freind, but be careful as you eldest is 11 and its not going to be long before they want to use social networking sites so he may try the same thing with them.

Apricot

If you block him then even if you comment on something on a mutual friends page - he won't be able to see it. If he searches for you absolutely nothing will come up - you could have just deleted your account.

Bowski_1011

Hi op, I totally understand how you feel about your children as I'm in the same situation myself. Seriously though I'd just do as the others have said... delete him, block him and put it out of your mind, he's not worth it!

hamstercheeks_2

please don't block contact worst thing you can do as this is what's happening to my OH atm

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Block him from finding anything out about you online. If he wants to see the children, he has a legal framework to go through, which doesn't involve knowing the names of your friends and your m afia overlord ranking.

Hobo17

I'm guessing this is facebook - when you start an account you have the option to add all your hotmail/yahoo/other email contacts as friends so that's probably what he has done. He may not have even realised he sent you a friend request.

maggied_2

hamstercheeks wrote: »

please don't block contact worst thing you can do as this is what's happening to my OH atm

OP isn't blocking contact - he hasn't seen his children in 5 years by his own choosing! People were just suggesting that OP blocks his account on Facebook so that he can't contact her on there.

I don't think any reasonable person would advocate blocking a father from seeing his children without very good reason (myself included....hence the legal action I mentioned in my post).

Primrose

I recommend you ignore his request. He is not your friend and has not been for a long time. If he wants to find you he knows how to make contract through the proper sources. He has no rights to be involved in your private life any more and if he comes back into it he will probably only cause you more pain and distress. Don't let yourself get stressed out about this. Just ignore the request.

HalfPint

Quick update.....He's been on said site for a long time so hasn't just joined and automatically sent the request. I'm not blocking contact..never have done but after refusing to have anything to do with his kids for the past five years...I'm not just gonna allow him access to information I don;t think he needs to know and is none of his business.

My dd wanted her surname changed so I did some searching online a while back to see if I could find an address for him, to write to (as I needed his permission) I was disgusted at what I found! and I'm not about to open the kids to a man who seems to have more than a passing interest in x-rated stuff! I know what he was like when we were together and it would appear he's gotton a whole heap worse.

Maggied is right...there is a legal framework in place that he can use should he wish to resume contact...I have not and will not accept his "friend" request.

Thank you all so much for helping me put things into perspective and make a decision....I got myself in a stew because I was thinking about his rights to see his kids etc etc and lost sight of previous history.

Thanks once again.

HP x