Family feud brewing over funeral

lavidaloca

How old is the child? Surely they are next of kin?

dzug1

The next of kin are NOT responsible for the funeral unless they choose to be. If they do choose to be then they are responsible for payment. Likewise if anyone else takes on the task they are responsible for payment.

If no one is able or willing to arrange and pay for the funeral, the local council (or in some cases the health authority) may do so, but only where the funeral has not already been arranged. The local council may also make a claim on the deceased's estate to pay for the funeral.

from directgov website

Swan_2

Errata wrote: »

Who has arranged the funeral? Whoever it was has the responsibility for paying for it. They may ask others to contribute to the cost, but they alone are responsible, and it is they whom the Funeral Directors will chase for the money.

spot on, it doesn't matter who the next of kin is ... for instance if the man next door made the arrangements, he'd get the bill

I had to stop a well-meaning student from arranging a funeral recently, he just wanted to help out in a practical way but had no idea he'd be landed with costs he'd no means of paying
of course he supported the relative who did make the arrangements, but was very careful not to sign anything


also, if a grant is applied for, the authorities will often ask close relatives if they have the means of paying before granting it, so be ready for that possibility


EDIT ... cross-posted with dzug, slo-o-o-w typing

pulliptears

Funerals are as simple as you need them to be, as Mr Cow says cremation is often cheaper. Is your nan including 2 or 3 funeral cars etc as well? Expensive flowers?

daska

This thread might help explain the grant situation.

Have you checked that whoever is booking hasn't opted for unnecessary expense? Cremation is generally cheaper than burial, embalming is optional etc etc.

jaxjax123

My mum (his twin) is arranging it she is on icapacity. She has been to a crematoriam in london thats where they live. I don't know the details of the expenses. If the grant isn't allowed I will insist my nan tries before I stump up. I really don't mind contributing and I will happily do so. I was thinking more like £100.

wannabe_sybil

Don't know if this is a welcome idea...

My late great uncle wanted his body to be donated to science because it was cheaper. We had to pay £300 for transportation to London.but otherwise his remains were used in the pursuit of science and then they were disposed of respectfully. My great uncle had outlived most of his friends and family, but a religious minister could perhaps organise a memorial service.

It is not for everyone, but it may be a way of dealing with your position. My great uncle really wanted it to be that way, so we just followed his instructions.

Also my late mother's funeral was around £2k and that was with no cars just the hearse, no flowers, etc. but it was an internment. Funerals are very expensive.

Please accept my condolences. It is so hard to make these decisions at such a difficult time.

Errata

jaxjax123 wrote: »

My mum (his twin) is arranging it she is on icapacity. She has been to a crematoriam in london thats where they live. I don't know the details of the expenses. If the grant isn't allowed I will insist my nan tries before I stump up. I really don't mind contributing and I will happily do so. I was thinking more like £100.

If she's on a low income her next step is to talk to the council and ask for a funeral grant - before she signs anything.

DX2

jaxjax123 wrote: »

my nan asked her daughter my mum to do it. As it is her twin brother. She is on icapasity and she is being told she can't claim. I was sure she would be able too.

Going back to this point jax Incapacity benefit is not on the list of benefits for entitlement.


You may be eligible for a Funeral Payment from the Social Fund if you or your partner are getting any of the following benefits or tax credits:

• Income Support
• income-based Jobseeker's Allowance
• income-related Employment and Support Allowance
• Pension Credit
• Housing Benefit
• Council Tax Benefit (or the Council Tax payer where you live gets a Second Adult Rebate because you are on a low income)
• Working Tax Credit which includes a disability or severe disability element
• Child Tax Credit at a rate higher than the family element

Who isn't eligible?


You can't get a payment as a close relative or close friend of the deceased if either:

• the deceased had a partner when they died
• there's a parent, son or daughter of the deceased who has not been awarded one of the qualifying benefits or was not estranged from the deceased. This doesn't include family members who are: aged under 18, qualifying young persons for the purposes of Child Benefit, full-time students, members of religious orders, in prison or in hospital (and who had been awarded a qualifying benefit immediately before they entered prison or hospital), asylum seekers being supported by the National Asylum Support Service or family members not ordinarily resident in the UK
• there's a close relative of the deceased, other than a close relative in one of the excluded groups listed above, who was in closer contact with the deceased than you were, or had equally close contact and is not getting a qualifying benefit

E2A: If she is not entitled to a funeral grant, i would be talking with the funeral director about a payment plan, they come across these things all the time.

belfastgirl23

DX2 wrote: »

Going back to this point jax Incapacity benefit is not on the list of benefits for entitlement.



You may be eligible for a Funeral Payment from the Social Fund if you or your partner are getting any of the following benefits or tax credits:

• Income Support
• income-based Jobseeker's Allowance
• income-related Employment and Support Allowance
• Pension Credit
• Housing Benefit
• Council Tax Benefit (or the Council Tax payer where you live gets a Second Adult Rebate because you are on a low income)
• Working Tax Credit which includes a disability or severe disability element
• Child Tax Credit at a rate higher than the family element

Who isn't eligible?



You can't get a payment as a close relative or close friend of the deceased if either:

• the deceased had a partner when they died
• there's a parent, son or daughter of the deceased who has not been awarded one of the qualifying benefits or was not estranged from the deceased. This doesn't include family members who are: aged under 18, qualifying young persons for the purposes of Child Benefit, full-time students, members of religious orders, in prison or in hospital (and who had been awarded a qualifying benefit immediately before they entered prison or hospital), asylum seekers being supported by the National Asylum Support Service or family members not ordinarily resident in the UK
• there's a close relative of the deceased, other than a close relative in one of the excluded groups listed above, who was in closer contact with the deceased than you were, or had equally close contact and is not getting a qualifying benefit

E2A: If she is not entitled to a funeral grant, i would be talking with the funeral director about a payment plan, they come across these things all the time.

If you are on incapacity benefit though maybe you'd be getting housing benefit as well? This is how it worked out for a relative of mine who was in the same position.

Agree with the others though OP, if you can't afford it, you need to say what you can afford - surely your nan would hate to see you getting into debt over this?