Want to be a mfw but worried?

ally18

Hm, in a quandry with dd2 at the moment and don't know what to say to her that doesn't start the mood.
She is currently taking driving lessons and has her test in September. She wants a car, as do most young people now. I have offered to pay half towards this with her dad so her budget is £1k. I know this is not a lot but I cannot afford more and to be perfectly honest, as a first car, I think she should stay small and cheap. She plans to go to uni next year and so will only be working part time. She will not be able to afford the upkeep on a cheap car let alone a newer one! But obviously my advice is going in one ear and out the other. I wanted her to wait till next year when she will really use it traveling to uni and back but that's another matter ...she cant wait apparently as her instructor says she will forget all she has learned?!
It appears she only wants a certain type of car, it has to be a volkswagon or a citroen because she has been 'told' they are the best. They are also way out her budget and the insurance is sky high. £3k after she has passed! She won't look at other small cars because someone has 'poo-poohed' them.
She is a bit quiet with me this morning. She couldn't buy the car she saw yesterday as it was way over the budget and I wouldn't let her use all her savings adding the money to pay for it.
Her friends are all driving around in cars now so I guess she feels a little left out.
This is where I wonder if I am doing the right thing by trying to op my mortgage. If I wasn't doing that, I could give my dds more money now for things like this.
I want the security of no mortgage in the future but I also want the security of knowing I did my best in ensuring my dds were happy whilst they were growing up. However, I don't want them to expect things just because they want things!
Perhaps both isn't possible at the moment? I need to think seriously on this.
Sorry for meandering post today.

Watty1

Difficult one. Can see you being torn. Am no help as don't have children - but - do have a very old peugot. 4 years ago I had an accident which means I can't drive a manual so I went out and bought a very cheap automatic - my maximum budget was £500 and I thought if it meant I had the freedom to go physio and the hospital as I needed to and it only lasted 3 to 4 months whilst my arm repaired it would be fine. I still can't drive manuals but that car has been fabulous! Every time it goes for a service or mot I remind the little back street chap that does it that I don't want to spend much on the car - and I never do - it sails through its services and its MOTs. Sorry not a lot of help, just wanted to reassure daughter that there are some fabulous other makes out there. My car is very old, not very pretty, but definitely reliable!!

ally18

Watty1 wrote: »

Difficult one. Can see you being torn. Am no help as don't have children - but - do have a very old peugot. 4 years ago I had an accident which means I can't drive a manual so I went out and bought a very cheap automatic - my maximum budget was £500 and I thought if it meant I had the freedom to go physio and the hospital as I needed to and it only lasted 3 to 4 months whilst my arm repaired it would be fine. I still can't drive manuals but that car has been fabulous! Every time it goes for a service or mot I remind the little back street chap that does it that I don't want to spend much on the car - and I never do - it sails through its services and its MOTs. Sorry not a lot of help, just wanted to reassure daughter that there are some fabulous other makes out there. My car is very old, not very pretty, but definitely reliable!!

Hi Watty and thank you for your reassuring comments. I did go home last night thinking am I being too cheap in wanting her to have something other than she wants iykwim. I spoke to her last night about it and she was upset yes but it appeared she had been thinking about it a lot more and realised that there are limits. Anyway, she has found another car to look at which is a fiat punto and she really likes the look of it. (I think that could be half the problem actually. It has to look nice as well)

I'm still going to rethink my future plans over the weekend. I admit I do find it hard now to not put costs first. I am constantly thinking of what I can and cannot spend, it has become an obsession! My dd3 actually gave me a big shock last night when she made the comment "its all about money with you mum, that's all you care about". She did say this with a laugh but it did hit home. I went a bit quiet after this thinking about it and she put her arms around me and gave me a hug which is very unusual. But now I feel if that is how my girls see me, what have I become?

Anyway, to continue, grocery budget this week is £10 due to being heavy handed at c***co last week and buying lbs of strawberries and cherries! Only fridge things needed so not to panic.

Going to another uni this weekend for dd2 to look around. Its the same one that dd1 is at so 'miss know it all' is coming up with lots of comments. Of course, this leads to falling out between the two of them. Oh the joys of teenage girls :rotfl:.

PenguinJim

I was reading this the other day. They run and run (apparently), and you might be able to get a 1.3L petrol K11 and insure it inside your budget.

On a somewhat different topic, "c***co" is one of the rudest things I've ever read on these boards! :rotfl:

ally18

PenguinJim wrote: »

I was reading this the other day. They run and run (apparently), and you might be able to get a 1.3L petrol K11 and insure it inside your budget.

On a somewhat different topic, "c***co" is one of the rudest things I've ever read on these boards! :rotfl:

Thanks PJ, I will have a look at those too.

Blimey, is c***co that bad

ally18

Well, the start to another week.
The uni visit was not for dd2, she didn't read the details properly so it was a wasted journey as regards her course details, though she did get to speak to some tutors.
On the way back, we visited dd1 new home for the next year. She is moving in with 5 others into rented accomodation. What can I say about this? It was absolutely disgusting! How the owner can be a landlord, I have no idea. It looked to me as if it had not been cleaned for months. But it is nothing to do with me, dd1 wants it and has already paid for it. I will be going in with her when she starts moving in and I will be armed with gloves and strong bleach before anything is put down in her room!

Dd2 has finally seen a car which she likes but £400 over budget. It will be cheaper than all the others for her on insurance though, so a deposit has been put down. I have upped my contribution by £200 for it.

Grocery budget was spent, £10 in all leaving £69 for the rest of the month. I have taken advantage of a £20 off voucher with Mr T and have a delivery coming next Friday, spent £41 leaving £28 for rest of July. All cupboards and freezers will be full come Friday.

Yesterday I went to the allotment to weed. My onions are looking fab so far. I came away with 2 lots of new potatoes, a cauliflower and 3 lots of rhubarb. Lunch was lovely and I have the rest for tonight's tea.

Baking done yesterday, 2 dz choc oat cookies, 24 choc chip muffins and a cherry custard flan which should last all this week as treats.

Despite extra contribution required for dd2's car, I should hopefully still be able to make a small op to m1 this month.

Beckyy

I would definitely concentrate your efforts on the mortgage with the highest interest rate as you're saving yourself more money in the long run.

ally18

Beckyy wrote: »

I would definitely concentrate your efforts on the mortgage with the highest interest rate as you're saving yourself more money in the long run.

Hi Becky, thankyou for posting.

I have actually done that as m2 was the highest rate I was paying. I have brought that down to under £1k which I'm very, very happy with and will now just be over paying to m1.

Watty1

Great going on M2. Soon be free of that one

Goldiegirl

Watty1 wrote: »

Great going on M2. Soon be free of that one

Bit confused there, I thought you were talking about the motorway !

Ally, excellent result on getting below £1k.