Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion

earthmother

I'm not sure I'd want to ban christmas, but we definitely are simplifying it a little more every year. We have 18 adults and 14 children (including three of our own) in the family, so things have the potential to get silly.

Each year the adults presents have become smaller, to the point where this year they are token gifts of only a couple of pounds, mostly homemade - and from the children not us - they don't feel right if Grandma etc doesn't get something to unwrap too. Everyone else in the family is of the same mindset so no-one gets upset.

And this year, we're making life simpler with the children too - as all the nieces and nephews get older, they get harder to buy for - after all £15 on a 3 year old is 'amazing' and fairly simple to do, £15 on a 15 year old doesn't really buy anything and there's no guarantee you've bought to their tastes - so I've saved a little each month and they're getting money instead.

I will admit it feels lazy not shopping for them all - in the past I've really enjoyed putting together bundles of things for each of them, but I also remember how busy and stressed each December would be, not so much with shopping as I've always picked things up cheap through the year, but spending hours wrapping it all, making sure A's present looks as good as sibling B's, trying to find a time when the various families schedules match up to swap carboot contents, and then trying to find places to hide what you've brought back each time.

This year, we make some cards, bake some cakes, stuff a few envelopes and we're done - much nicer

And all that wrapping paper I bought in the January sales now won't just get strewn across umpteen living rooms - we need some new paper chains - I've got enough paper to do the whole house

heppy23

Good article. I work hard for the money I earn and dread the pressure to spend so much of it on one day.

So much of the stuff you see in the shops is utter rubbish. Useless tat.

I am personally dreading Christmas. We have the extended family round for dinner (what an obscene meal that ends up being), they all talk far too loud and I don't even get offered a seat in my own house when I've finished cooking and clearing up.
Highlight of the day is taking one of the kids for a long walk in the pushchair - "He/she looks a bit flushed, better get them some fresh air".

opaque

I think the article is a bit over the top, and also adds in non-christmas stuff.

If you are poor: you shouldn't be spending money you don't have/can't afford
If you are worried about the environmental damage, don't buy presents, tell people not to get you anything
If you want to only swop small gifts, get small gifts, Poundland is great and one of the 2 for £7 tins of chocolates from Asda last week would have been a great cheap present.
If you have a large family just cut your present giving to those of a certain age or those you do actually see on a regular basis.

Now thats over and done with what about the rest of us?
Maybe we want to have a good time? I personally once, a few years ago didn't have any ideas of what I wanted for Christmas and ended up being given utter rubbish, (much more towards the useless presents mentioned that you might default to) so each year since then I have been putting more effort into giving presents, not receiving. I give my parents lots of presents, from a big one (hamper) to small things (small trinkets, dvd's bought very cheap) as well as chocolates etc, all individually wrapped, that stretches out the fun and love of Christmas. I also give presents to many people at work without the expectation of getting anything back. It's more about the feeling of giving and caring about others, and making people happy. That's a great present in itself.

Also if you are on this board you can easily buy something expensive for a big discount. The person receiving the gift will think you spent the full price and think you very generous, without the need for you to actually be so.


I enjoy the whole period of Christmas. Yes the stuff in Boots is overpriced and silly (so don't buy it) but part of the fun is just looking round all the shops, seeing what there is and enjoying just that. You don't need to buy everything you see. It's especially great fun very close to Christmas just walking around watching the mad people frnatically buying things as you walk past supping a hot drink totally relaxed.

As for the girl who wanted the big party, limo, club etc. That sort of girl needs to be taught the value of money. If she's going to clubs she's old enough to get a job to pay for it!
She's probably very right about her friends and being seen as silly, but someone started it, I blame the parents.

RinEdinburgh

I agree with a lot of what Martin said. Instead of presents we can just love people and give our time. Another idea is something called 'Just Christmas' a project developed by MBC Baptist Church.
The idea is that you 'buy one, give one' every time you buy a Christmas present. So every time you buy a pressie for a friend or relative you give the equivalent amount to the 'just Christmas project' justchristmas.org.uk or to another charity or someone that could do with help. It just means folks that do not have much could be blessed. Blessings.

Yogibear

we think it a good idea as well,we did this two years ago after the farce of getting things from siblings ie after shave when I have had a beard for 6 years,paper hankies,size 6 slippers when I`m 6 feet one and 15st.:rotfl:the upturn being we are not invited to any nights out,we were expected to buy gifts for neices and nephews earning over £30000 and us getting bottle of wine from their parents though we dont drink,sorry if I sound a miserable `git`:D:D

heuristic_abyss

Each year I get the OH and his family asking me to put things on my Amazon wishlist. Trouble is, each year I can never think of what I want.

For a change this year I've put charity gifts on my list, e.g. 'chickens - a must have gift from World Vision'. As a result someone in another country who is worse off than many will then get chickens and be able to feed their family.

A much nicer idea than receiving unwanted gifts.

jellyhead

haggisneepsandtatties wrote: »

The friend that did object, said to 'buy something small' for her daughter, however, if I had bought something small for one child, then I would have to buy something small for all the children! I explained that, and my friend replied 'Well dont expect anything yourself if you cant be bothered to buy anything for my little girl'.

Would you really have to buy for all the children if you bought for just one? Would the others find out?

Perhaps her little girl only has a small acquaintance and your gift would have been a big deal to her? If that's the case then could your friend provide you with a gift to pass on and pretend it's from you?

jellyhead

Deleted_User wrote: »

I'm sick of Christmas already. All the shops are decorated and selling mostly TAT - yes it IS mostly tat - done up in lots of packaging. The shops are already heaving with people buying all this rubbish and the endless loop of Christmas music is enough to make anyone lose whatever Christmas spirit they started out with.

(At the risk of upsetting the many Boots fans - why exactly are the Christmas 3 for 2s seen as such good deals? Much of the stuff is cheaper to buy in Boots and elsewhere without the fancy packaging!) Ditto for all the other stores. As for BHS, I cannot even bear to go in there - such is the rubbish by the entrance that poses as someone's Christmas gift.

Does anyone reading this actually WANT strange flavoured oils and all the other weird flavoured jams and chutneys? Champagne or whisky flavoured jam for goodness sake in a tiny jar stuffed into a box of tissue with another equally awful concoction.)

The shopping centre nearest to me has an enormous tree up and all the decorations. They look lovely - but the little kids think Santa is coming this week! Cue... tantrums galore.

Meanwhile- at work - I'm being pestered to decide if I want to go to the 'works outing' - (no - I do not). And aaargh! The secret Santa list has again appeared.

Then there's all the offers to spend X amount just to get free postage or some other small discount. I wonder how many people then spend up to that amount just to get the free postage or discount.

A bargain is only a bargain if you were going to buy the thing anyway.

As for Martin asking if Christmas should be banned? It's only a matter of time before it is. No doubt someone somewhere is already dreaming up reasons as to why it's offensive to someone.

I'm not one of the avid boots fans on MSE but I took advantage of a recent offer and I thought it was excellent value. The toys are the same price as you'd pay elsewhere. Delivery is free. If you can get them on 3 for 2 with 24% back in points (assuming they are worth something to you - to buy toothpaste and shampoo when it's on BOGOF perhaps?) then I don't think I'm going to find a better offer elsewhere. As long as all 3 gifts were things I was going to buy already and I don't get sucked into getting rubbish things for everyone else at over inflated prices then it's a winner.

Oh, and yes I love chutney and would be thrilled to receive some

jellyhead

Sorry I forgot to say - I clicked the link for the email to send to people, and it wasn't there. It seems like a great idea for using to downsize the present list and stop buying for people you'd rather not. There are people I do want to buy for though, and I enjoy it.

sccarig

I'm agree with much of this. My immediate family get a small token gift at Christmas (a bottle or some sweets or a modest toy) and that is that.

Birthdays are more of a problem - I suggested not giving presents this year and was shot down as "we don't communicate much at the best of times and it prompts a response". This irritates me no end - can't they thank for a card? do you only merit a call if money is involved?

As it happens i've forgotten twice this year (not on purpose) & received texts and calls galore reminding me that a card/present hadn't arrived!

This year is the last...