How to control those impulse spends

wendyloub

I have sat today and worked out my finances properly including all my debts, and as I thought my income is less than my outgoings.

This does however include around £300 that I spend on my credit card each month on stuff I really don't need, mainly eating out and trips to the local shop because I can't be bothered to cook, or petrol because I fancied just getting out. I don't really spend much on things, things aren't my thing, but food and socialising are.

So how do you stop yourselves, I got £20 of the ex yesterday towards DD's party food, so what did I do? took the kids to MacDonald's, and brought wine and a ready meal for me, that's it £20 gone just like that.

This morning I have arranged a night out, including a meal with mates, even though I know I really shouldn't as I have a few more nights out coming up, before Christmas, but being stuck in with my children on my own night after night makes me a bit desperate for adult company.

Today my shopping came, amongst it two bottles of wine one I must have ordered by accident, the other I didn't really need so did I send them back, did I !!!!!!y!!

Aghhhhhhh I am my own worst enemy!!!

How do you handle temptation?

xxamypxx

wendyloub wrote: »

I got £20 of the ex yesterday towards DD's party food, so what did I do? took the kids to MacDonald's, and brought wine and a ready meal for me, that's it £20 gone just like that.

By not spending money that is meant for your children?!

Fuzzy_Duck

I'm also awful for buying things I don't need, but it must be said, I agree with xxamypxx- spending your own money on stuff you don't need is one thing, spending money meant for your kids on yourself is quite another!

Personally I have both my OH and my mother to tell me off if I spend unnecessary money so I feel guilty and do it a lot less... I also use cards as little as I can as it never feels like you'd spending any money does it :rolleyes: Check how much money you're spending as often as you can, keeping a log if you have the time to work out where you're wasting money and how much you can really afford.

I go out to eat far too often too and that is because better-off friends are always suggesting it and I never want to say no. If you're in a similar position, avoid these situations as best as you can, but to be honest it sounds like you don't really need any temptation... you're already willing to splash out on a nice meal out you don't really need.

Can't offer much advice really. If you're that fussed about spending more than you earn you will stop doing such things as you'll quite simply have no choice eventually.

Hermia

I think you need to start planning and also be a bit stern with yourself. If you started planning your meals properly you may easily have enough for the occasional night out. Ready meals and buying food from a local shop is very expensive. If you did some batch cooking and filled your freezer or fridge with meals for the week you could save a huge amount of money. Batch cooking is not the most exciting way to spend a couple of hours, but it is worth it.

Are your friends as bad with money on your night outs? I am on a budget and when a meal out is planned I always try to steer my friends towards a restaurant that has a reasonably-priced set menu. In my experience they are always happy to eat there and save some money themselves.

I think you really need to keep a strict spending diary for a few weeks. I think seeing what you are spending in black and white will be the shock you need!

londoner1998

wendyloub wrote: »

I have sat today and worked out my finances properly including all my debts, and as I thought my income is less than my outgoings.

This does however include around £300 that I spend on my credit card each month on stuff I really don't need, mainly eating out and trips to the local shop because I can't be bothered to cook, or petrol because I fancied just getting out. I don't really spend much on things, things aren't my thing, but food and socialising are.

So how do you stop yourselves, I got £20 of the ex yesterday towards DD's party food, so what did I do? took the kids to MacDonald's, and brought wine and a ready meal for me, that's it £20 gone just like that.

This morning I have arranged a night out, including a meal with mates, even though I know I really shouldn't as I have a few more nights out coming up, before Christmas, but being stuck in with my children on my own night after night makes me a bit desperate for adult company.

Today my shopping came, amongst it two bottles of wine one I must have ordered by accident, the other I didn't really need so did I send them back, did I !!!!!!y!!

Aghhhhhhh I am my own worst enemy!!!

How do you handle temptation?

Hello!
Well, the main thing is that you have identified that you spend too much on things you don't need. I can understand it up to a point because I used to spend much more (but I had the money to do it), but since we moved house and we are paying a hefty rent for a paradise flat, we had to rein things in quite a lot.

I would say, stop buying ready made meals- they are a complete rip off and not very good for you. Buy the ingredients you need and cook at home. Freeze what you don't eat straight away. Much healthier for both you and your wallet (not to mention your children).

Last night I felt desperately in need of a treat: I had worked my a*** off to get a job (I am trying to move around my company and away from my boring job but it is proving hard) and after tons of preparation and a pretty decent interview, I didn't get the job. I felt tired and slightly demoralised and my boyfriend suggested I need to treat myself ' you have worked so hard'... but I am already overdrawn!!
I wanted a curry, but I know that I have no money to waste- so I went to the supermarket- got a bag of cous-cous, and used up the tofu at home, some pepers that were getting a bit old and also bought a jar of tagine- cooked a wonderful dinner in minutes and the rest is our lunches today. Felt instantly better and didn't waste money (under 4 quid including the tofu). Still have tons of cous-cous to cook with whatever is at home...

It seems boredom is your problem too, as well as friend you can't keep up with. How about dinner in each other's homes and you each bring a dish? If they can't understand you can't afford all that eating out they are not really good friends. Cancel that dinner out that you scheduled today. You can't afford it. And send back that bottle of wine- you will feel better for doing it and getting your cash back.

But you have to understand it first. And no, Macdonalds is not that cheap- check you cupboard and fridge and see what you have- cook that- and only shop when you have nothing left...A treat is great every so often, but make sure you stay within your budget. It feels even better that way.

Good luck (I am off to heat up my cous-cous...)

londoner1998

Hermia wrote: »

I think you need to start planning and also be a bit stern with yourself. If you started planning your meals properly you may easily have enough for the occasional night out. Ready meals and buying food from a local shop is very expensive. If you did some batch cooking and filled your freezer or fridge with meals for the week you could save a huge amount of money. Batch cooking is not the most exciting way to spend a couple of hours, but it is worth it.

Are your friends as bad with money on your night outs? I am on a budget and when a meal out is planned I always try to steer my friends towards a restaurant that has a reasonably-priced set menu. In my experience they are always happy to eat there and save some money themselves.

I think you really need to keep a strict spending diary for a few weeks. I think seeing what you are spending in black and white will be the shock you need!

Completely agree! Batch cooking and freezing is both time - and moneysaving!

wendyloub

By not spending money that is meant for your children?!

I just read that back and it sounds awful!! the party food had already been paid for by me in with my weekly shopping, so I'm saying instead of putting that money in the bank for credit card bill I wasted it!

I go for weeks on end doing meal planning and cooking from scratch, then I have a meltdown, and can't be arsed and this I guess is my danger time, batch cooking would be a good idea, because on those nights I could just dive in the freezer. I spend around £60 on groceries to last the week, then I blow £20 on a whim.

I am still going out at the weekend, but have cancelled the meal part so I will just have to fork out for a few lagers, will have a cheap night instead.

I think a part of me does try to keep up with my mates, I have to learn to say no, to them and to myself!!

GettingHitched

Im pretty sure that no one on here is perfect, and we all have a mishaps (carp with money phases) I do have them.

Whats important (esp as you have kids) is to organise yourself and be strict. Save money on things where you can ( batch cook, make food stretch, use old style mse whereever possible ) have yourself a spending diary, note down what you spend, on what and where, work out if there are triggers for your spending ( for me, if I get the train to work, I have to walk through the high street, and can not resist spending money on the pets, so I pay 15p extra for the bus which drops me off right outside work!) If you want wine/cakes/biccies then bake/make them yourself, if you want to find out how, im sure there are classes in your area that will help with the boredom and the money

flippin36

wendyloub wrote: »

By not spending money that is meant for your children?!

I just read that back and it sounds awful!! the party food had already been paid for by me in with my weekly shopping, so I'm saying instead of putting that money in the bank for credit card bill I wasted it!

I go for weeks on end doing meal planning and cooking from scratch, then I have a meltdown, and can't be arsed and this I guess is my danger time, batch cooking would be a good idea, because on those nights I could just dive in the freezer. I spend around £60 on groceries to last the week, then I blow £20 on a whim.

I am still going out at the weekend, but have cancelled the meal part so I will just have to fork out for a few lagers, will have a cheap night instead.

I think a part of me does try to keep up with my mates, I have to learn to say no, to them and to myself!!

Hi, when I read it I guessed that you didn't mean it like it sounded. Don't worry about people being judgemental.

Like others have said being organised is absolutely the best thing you can do with your money. You will save loads! Have budgets for everything, and see it as a challange to stick to them or even be under budget. I reward myself every month if I go under budget with something I would never normally buy myself. If I really want something (like I want to book a weekend away at the moment), rather than just using my CC I find ways of making extra money to pay for it. I kind of enjoy the challenge.

Good luck.

BitterAndTwisted

What I do:

Only ever leave home with the exact amount of cash that I need to spend and no more.

Never take a wallet with credit cards unless I actually intend to buy something I've planned for and that includes making the repayments on it.

It's an eye-watering experience to jot down every single penny spent in a note-book for about a fortnight: this can concentrate the mind very, very effectively. Well, it did mine and that's why I currently have no debts, thank the Lord.

Check out the Old Style board. There are an infinite number of clever and sneaky ways to cut spending and maybe live and eat better than you currently do now but it does take a little dedication and time to see the rewards

LJM

why not start having a dinner party/meal at home few games dvd get your mates to bring the wine cheaper than a few rounds of lager down the pub or club,be strict with yourself set goals dont take money out with you you dont need then it cant be spent,put your credit card away and batch cook, you will soon see results with money savings