the next step???

enemes

Dancing_Shoes wrote: »

If only this amounted to child abuse (which is how I see it!), but if they are old enough to have their own minds then it is very hard to prove:mad:

You would be very suprised at how old some of these victims are, after many years of abuse, such as Parental Alienation Syndrome. A parent who wants to manipulate a child can become very skilled at it if they get to their child at an earlier enough age.

smoothassilk

is the LO just against a person, the reason i ask is when they tried to get it the first time round they got the address slighty wrong so it wasnt granted, this time they got it right so it was granted but since then my ex has moved, so will the LO still be ok,
As for stopping an nrp from seeing the children, i have done that with my ex seeing our 7 year old daughter for her own sake, and mine

Dancing_Shoes

enemes wrote: »

You would be very suprised at how old some of these victims are, after many years of abuse, such as Parental Alienation Syndrome. A parent who wants to manipulate a child can become very skilled at it if they get to their child at an earlier enough age.

It is very sad though:(

We can all have a moan about the opposite side etc and may have no time for them what so ever but the most important people are the children. When i had children with my husband I did so because I loved him and wanted children, if it were to change and he was to bu88er off etc then yes I would be very angry but I would NEVER use my children to hurt him. (other objects maybe;))

chriszzz

enemes wrote: »

You would be very suprised at how old some of these victims are, after many years of abuse, such as Parental Alienation Syndrome. A parent who wants to manipulate a child can become very skilled at it if they get to their child at an earlier enough age.

PAS is a hard one to prove here in the UK, It is not recognized and is not an official diagnosis.

I can remember one time reading were a father in the USA who was paying maintenance for his children, who become to hate him and wanted nothing to do with him, he went to court and because the children who hated him so much the judge stopped the maintenance order because he lost all right of parental responsibility because of the hate the children had for him. I just can not remember where I read that post, I should of saved it.

I can remember at the time of reading it, thinking that it was right that the judge stopped him paying maintenance for children whom he had no responsibilities to rather than just money. It was the fact that they hated him and wanted nothing to do with him that the judge diminished all responsibilities.

Soubrette

chriszzz wrote: »

PAS is a hard one to prove here in the UK, It is not recognized and is not an official diagnosis.

I can remember one time reading were a father in the USA who was paying maintenance for his children, who become to hate him and wanted nothing to do with him, he went to court and because the children who hated him so much the judge stopped the maintenance order because he lost all right of parental responsibility because of the hate the children had for him. I just can not remember where I read that post, I should of saved it.

I can remember at the time of reading it, thinking that it was right that the judge stopped him paying maintenance for children whom he had no responsibilities to rather than just money. It was the fact that they hated him and wanted nothing to do with him that the judge diminished all responsibilities.

The only problem with that is that the children will just see their Dad couldn't even be bothered to pay maintenance, on top of all his other sins - real or imagined.

I honestly believe that unless there is child protection issues then it is not the place of the PWC to decide if the NRP is a good enough parent for access. I think if there were some way of intervening as soon as either the PWC or the child refuses access then things like parent alienation syndrome might be easier to spot early.

I would say - access is denied twice in a row for whatever reason then the NRP should have a free body (dare I say it, like the CSA) to go to and demand that there be family counselling between the PWC/NRP and the child with a view to reinstating access as soon as possible.

A trained counsellor should be able to tell if either the PWC or the NRP (it's not just the former that can use access as a weapon) are playing games and also should be able to help the child assess what he or she really feels about both parents.

It would be expensive but access to both parents is a child's right.

Sou

smoothassilk

ok so i found out my ex has moved since the LO was granted ive informed the csa of this and they said that wasnt a problem.
The thing is he has moved into his girlfriends room at the local pub, what i want to know is i understand that a bailiff can not enter a property unless invited in, but how does that work when its a public house and the door would be open? would they just be able to walk in and go anywhere in the building i.e upstairs to his room?

smoothassilk

Had a call on friday to say the case is now with the bailiffs, just want to know if anyone knows how quickly the bailiffs start work on the case?

speedster

smoothassilk wrote: »

Had a call on friday to say the case is now with the bailiffs, just want to know if anyone knows how quickly the bailiffs start work on the case?

don't hold your breath.

if the bailiffs or DCA are unsuccessful 3 times, they pass it back to the csa.

smoothassilk

ok but how quickly do they actually get to work on the case once they have got it from the csa, i want to know as i know my ex will start hasseling me again once he hears from them

speedster

smoothassilk wrote: »

ok but how quickly do they actually get to work on the case once they have got it from the csa, i want to know as i know my ex will start hasseling me again once he hears from them

anytime really. probably within a couple of weeks.