feeling deflated

yumyums

I am not doing all that stuff! There will be no chair covers and I'm probably not having flowers apart from my bouquet. I agree with everyone who says your wedding should be the way you want it. I don't really think I could handle organising all those details which is why we've decided to have the reception in a restaurant - they just need to do what they usually do! Don't stress about it. The most important thing is that you and your OH agree on the sort of thing you want.

frannyann

yumyums wrote: »

I am not doing all that stuff! There will be no chair covers and I'm probably not having flowers apart from my bouquet. I agree with everyone who says your wedding should be the way you want it. I don't really think I could handle organising all those details which is why we've decided to have the reception in a restaurant - they just need to do what they usually do! Don't stress about it. The most important thing is that you and your OH agree on the sort of thing you want.

Snap, the only reason we have table decorations, table flowers and chair covers is because the venue organises and sets it all up

jinky67

If I have my way it will be thus.......

me and him
2 witnesses
service
pub to get !!!!ed with friends and family
home

Violetta_2

webitha wrote: »

me and HIM are seriously considering doing the deed :D
we both know what we want, we wrote down our perfect wedding, then showed each other, and they were neigh on identical lol, so thats a good start.

now ive never been to a wedding, let alone oranise one, so icame on here and some other sites to get inspiration,
but
everyone is going n about favours, chairs covers, sit down meals, sweetie tables,etc we can neither afford nor want (favours) any of that kind of stuff, but im feeling crap as everyone seems to go down that route, will our guests be expecting it??
so im feeling deflated at the whole thing even before i start, and thinking sod it an not bother,

someone please tell me they are not doing all the bumpf

Congratulations honey, don't worry a jot about favours, tablecloths 5 course meals 6 bridesmaids etc etc. (No offence to anyone else of course) None of that matters, what matters is you have found your soul mate & you want to spend your lives together. None of that other stuff is really that important. Ok it's lovely to have a big bash & well done to those that do but that won't make their marriages any better, happier or last longer than your's.
Your guests will be there because they love & care for you, & if any of them are the type to say oh look we didn't get a wee bag of almond favours from webitha, do you really give a flying erm pig!! what they think.
You have found your oh & you want the same things, thats amazing:j:j:j:j:j:beer::beer::beer:
It's too easy to get caught up in the "Perfect Wedding" completely forgetting it's really about 2 people uniting in love & marriage.

ClaireN75

jinky67 wrote: »

the day is all about YOU and HIM, stuff what anyone else thinks:cool:

So true. If you know how you want the day to be (and it sounds like you're off to a great start with that) then just keep that in mind and plan to it. Your guests will enjoy it all the more for it being a true reflection of you both :beer:

mdhughes03

Two ways to look at this:
1 you don't need any of the "Stuff" just you him and someone official

2 The things you do want, you can do cheaply if you want e.g. I was going to have a landy copy of a designer gown made but I stumbled on an authentic Maggie Sottero second hand on ebay good condition although it needs a clean, and was £2000 originally but I got it for £60. SInce I had budgeted £150 we are going to use a little bit of the money we have saved to have a sweet buffet. This is something I thought we couldn't justify but having looked at very cheap sweetie options and jars and realising one of the survey sites I use gives out tesco vouchers as rewards we are going to do it and it will cost £15 at most-will look much more extravagant as I will add some home-made touches.

We could no way afford a 4 course sit down meal etc but have found a venue who will let us have a buffet as our "Sit-Down" meal for £16.95 a head just by asking if it was an option.

My mum is making our favours-little shortbread hearts in cheapo cellophane bags from ebay-not £2 a head miniatures etc. I think they will look charming and people will appreciate a home-made touch without noticing the cost.

So I'd suggest writing a list of definites and would like to haves and researching the definites well to find the cheapest way of doing it and then spending any money you save on equally well researched "luxuries"

Good Luck, it will be fabulous whatever you have

lindaatno9

Just to add, the success of your day is not determind on chair covers, favours or sweetie tables.:beer:

shellsuit

We're not having favours as we're not having a wedding breakfast.

We're having chair covers, but only because the venue provide them and they are free!

We are having a sweet table, but only because there will be no desserty stuff on the buffet. (sweet table works out cheaper than paying for desserts from the venue!)



You don't NEED anything extra, than you, your hubby to be and 2 witnesses.

You can get married in jeans and then go straight home if that's what you want.

There is no set plan for a wedding, it's what the happy couple wants that counts!



P.S. I want a party because I've never had one in the 33 I've been around...get the violins out lol

svjenni

I'm not having a sweetie table or chair covers - our budget won't allow - its very easy once you get started to keep "tweeking" your budget to allow for these things - i certainly did not think about any of these items when i got engaged, but as others have said you don't need them.

I want favours - but I am making them myself and don't expect them to cost more than a tenner (heart shaped cookies).

The first thing you need to do is set a budget - you'll be amazed at what some of the ladies on here come up with in terms of great ideas for very little money

p.s. - tell us what you want too - numbers, location and the type of day you want will help us suggest things - a lot of the above posts are about small weddings, but if you want a big do without the fancy stuff you can do that too!

Personally, I found watching the wedding channel helpful when i first got engaged, but only "for better or for worse" - its changing rooms with weddings, very american but they get $5000 to set up the big day in a week. It shows that with some hard work and a lot of love you will have an amazing wedding. Those weddings usually have so much more emotion than the ones on bridezilla who have spent thousands and agonized over every little detail it makes you realise that, you don't have to spend lots of money or have all those things wedding mags tell you to have, unless you decide you want them!

fastbargins

You've done exactly the right thing in writing down what you both want first before speaking to other people about what their idea of a 'perfect' wedding is! Now that you have those two lists that you and your hubby to be made up - Laminate them! Every time someone says "Oh you MUST arrive at the venue in a hot air balloon!" or whatever, just get the lists out and remind yourself that this wasn't your idea of a perfect day!

BUT - BEWARE OF THE PARENTS!! My mother-in-law (bless her) had a real shoestring wedding when she got hitched and so when we were planning our wedding, she really tried to make it the wedding she never got to have. Although my wife and I stuck our heals in on a couple of things she wanted that we didn't (no, we WANT a disco not a live band!), we did compromise on some stuff because we knew how important it was to her that her little princess had a nice wedding, and that her friends were all impressed by it! Compromising didn't cost us anything more largely because we gave her a copy of our list of the things we wanted before she had a chance to think about what she wanted and then said that anything else on top of that would be something she would have to pay for because our budget wouldn't cover it! That kind of gave her a limit for what she wanted, so we ended up with a big fancy cake that we didn't plan for but didn't mind having, and we went to the church in hired cars rather than using our friends as we had planned. But it meant that my mother-in-law was also happy about her grand day out!

Also - ebay is the biggest and best wedding shop in the world!! My wife bought her flowers on ebay from someone who made artificial arrangements as a wee side line and they cost a tenner, not only a massive barging, but we also still have the bouquet as another reminder of our day!