Ending a friendship?

k_bagpuss

I think friends can come and go in and out of our lives. I had a good friend who was bridesmaid at my wedding and I don't see her anymore. It wasn't through want of trying but we went from going out together once or twice a week to being every couple of weeks and then when I moved (ironically I was even nearer to where she lived) I didn't hear from her. My last contact was last November - her birthday is Halloween and I rang her saying I wanted to drop off her present and card (she'd got me a little something for my birthday in the June so I was recipricating). She called me to say thanks and I left the conversation with "Give me a ring and you can come over to the new flat" and that was the last I heard from her. I bought a house in May and emailed everyone with the new address and phone number but haven't heard a peep from her since! So I just stopped making the effort thinking friendships, like other relationships are two way things, and if one person isn't bothered anymore then there's not a great deal you can do about it

Any

I personally think that women with families should try occassionaly have a day out without the children with their friends..

I find that a lot of our friends who have kids just refuse to go anywhere without kids - recently what happened is that only mothers meet up (with kids) and only guys meet up - rarely you get to see both parents without the kids.

Women without the kids feel with the mothers like on alien ground - and with men like they are trying to stop their fun. This can divide even the most solid friendship.

I like to think that one day I will be able to leave my child with babysitter/grandmother and go out and have fun just like I was child worry free person.

But I am not there yet, so we will have to wait and see whether it will be so easy to do:-)

Amanda65

I think those who have posted about meeting up without your daughter may have a point (although maybe you have tried to meet just the two of you?)

Having had three children (now all teenagers) I have always made an effort to see my friends sometimes without them in tow - it's important for me and important for them. Just a thought though - what is your friend's situation in life ? Does she want children and it's not happening, in which case she may find it difficult to see you and your daughter ?

If she is important to you, and you want to keep in contact, I would send her a nice handwritten card (are the texts arriving when she is working for example and she hasn't time to contact you properly) saying that you appreciate how busy she is at the moment but miss her company and hope you can get together, just the two of you, soon for a proper catch up. If it's not that important that you remain friends then i wouldn't 'officially' break friends but leave the ball back in her court.

bluestarrz

Thanks for the input, she loves children, but each occasion I've asked to meet up I have suggested it just be us two and that's when I've received the 'busy' response i just don't know what changed. Don't think it's practical to see her once every 6months for ten minutes and buy gifts as I'd rather have the time together I guess?