Planning a baby...!

kitkat5566

Hi

I am looking for some advise, me and my partner r looking to start trying for a baby, being honest we hav been ready for a long long time but i have kept putting it off as i wanted to save up for this! however, i have decided i want to go ahead, 100%. my worry is that i work full and part time, however my partner is out of work. he was made redundant over a year ago and has had odd jobs but nothing that is permanent. we live solely off my income. i work for a charity and i dont even get sick pay so i am dreading what my manager will say if i have to tell him i am expecting. i think we will be able to get by, buying 2nd hand items and not going over the top but what would be best, me going on maternity leave and returning to work and allowing my OH to be a fulltime parent? i really am not sure! in a way i wish i had been made redundant and he was in work now as it would be easier for me to just stay at home with the baby. i know things are going to be really really tight. i hate to moan about money when this is about bringing a new life into the world but it is something you have to think about in order to get by! I have tried saving but by the time i had paid the rent and all other bills i am lucky if anything is left.
Sorry to go on so much it feels better just getting it off my chest!!!

ebony90

Wait a while, save up, get OH established in a job. Then try. Only a thought.

rachiee

Personally i would wait. You need to make sure your baby is introuduced into a stable unit.. bringing a baby up with not alot of money when you could wait a few years till you have the money you need to buy it everything it needs new is much easier. Dont struggle when you dont have to

msb5262

I don't understand how you can NOT get sick pay?

Gena

Hi Kitkat,

Only you and your OH can decide if this is the right time. Whilst he's out of work it does seem more sensible for him to be the main carer - but again that's for you to decide - if you want to stay at home then you may need to think about putting it on hold until he gets a job.

As for the financial side, as far as I know you're legally entitled to a certain amount of maternity pay, though it doesn't work out to be a huge amount. If you look around on the main site you should find some information. There was also a thread on here a few weeks back about having a baby without it costing the earth, that may help (I can't remember what it was called though, sorry).

Good luck, and once you've decided to go for it come and join the Trying for a Baby thread!

username456

I used to work as a florist and did not recieve sick pay if I was off work ill. I think you can claim statutory sick pay from the government, but I think you have to be off a certain amount of time.

kitkat5566

thanks for all the advice! think i am going to give it afew months and try to save some money and hope my OH gets a job! oh and MSB i dont get paid sick pay, appart from ssp if i have been off for 4 or more days.

Rummer

There is hardly ever a good time to have a baby, you could always save more money or wait for a promotion etc I think if you are ready you should start trying. My DH was my daughters full time carer until she went to nursery and although I would have rather been at home it worked out financially better for me to work and him not to.

Pee

There is no reason why you couldn't go ahead, after all a lot of people don't plan their finances. How does your OH feel about being a full time carer and how do you think you would feel after giving birth about going back to work?

Is your OH trying to find a new job? If it's been a year is that because his profession has been seriously hit by the recession, or should you be thinking about relocating or retraining to improve his chances?

**confuzzled**

OP tbh if you're emotionally ready then go for it! There are a multitude of reasons as to why not to start trying for a baby but the reality is that everything else will just fall into place and you'll manage, and if your OH doesn't get a job then it's money saved on childcare;)

Also you may not get pg straight away, we've been trying for 6months and still nothing:rolleyes: Yeah money is tight, neither of us have brilliant jobs and having a child will be difficult in all respects but it will be loved and it'll always come first and we're emotionally ready for it...........just gotta wait for that pesky little bean to choose us as parents now:D:D:D

Whatever you finally decide good luck and remember the TTC thread is a great place for support:D:D

kitkat5566

We have had many discussions laying out the pros and cons and we have decided we are going to start trying :j hopefully all will go well!
OH is happy to stay at home and be the main carer, but i am sure my mum will assist too (she doesnt work due to health reasons).
Pee, OH is out of work as the area we live in there are absolutely no jobs at all, he is trained as a class 1 & 2 driver, electrician, etc but there isnt anything round here as we live in a poor area with v high unemployment.
If all goes well *fingers crossed* we will get most of the stuff from ebay
or bootsales (appart from odds that are recommended not to) wish us luck!