Not strictly old school but really need some help...

princess_lou

I know this isnt os exactly but i really want some one to talk to... im so lonely all the time... i moved to my area march last year and i havnt made any friends. im sorry for postin on here... but had the page up and was gettin baby ready to go 4 a walk then changged my mindbecause i dnt want to walk by myself againEVERYDAY...I walk to school, and home by myself.. i spend all day at home by myself and sat coz oh at footie... i go clothes shoppin by myself and i havnt been out with a friend for nearly 20 months... im soso lonely and i know pple do shop etc on own but i just cant bear it any more brcause the only contact i have had other then family is on here... ive neva been this lonely and sad and i dnt know wot to do about it/

tandraig

hi princess lou
I see you have a baby - have a look to see if there are any mother and baby groups locally - notices tend to be outside church or parish halls and community centres. is there a local library nearby? staff there are usually helpful about things like that. what about your local health visitor? could you talk to her? another idea is - radical i know - but couldnt you tag along to footy with husband - even if its not your thing i know other wives and g/friends go. do you have older child at school - try starting a conv with other mums at school gate when picking up older child. just a few ideas - sure other posters will have many more.

esmf73

I know exactly how you feel. We move a lot cos my OH is in the army - but when he's not at work hes on his computer ALL THE TIME - even until 2am. My eldest is possible ADHD and can be a bit too much to handle sometimes, so we don't get invited to go and play anywhere - plus we've just moved into a new area.

I know - "nice to meet new people" etc, but not all the time. Have just signed on for Gym membership as I thought that when he's on his computer I'll be at the gym - a new bod by Christmas!

Where are you in the UK?

kittiej

Hiya Lou

Is there anyone at the school that you could talk to and maybe invite round to yours for a natter?

How many children do you have?

You sound really fed up tbh.

Can you give us more details so we can offer more options?

Pink.

Hi princess lou,

I really feel for you because that's the way I felt when I left work to bring up my children. It was terribly lonely, I felt isolated, and there was only so much baby talk I could handle in one day without going insane. It does get better, well it did for me. You have a little one and that can help you to meet people and make friends. I met many of my current friends when mine were pre-school and we went to mother and toddlers, tumble-tots etc and when they go to school you'll meet lots of mums in the same position as you. I know it's easy to say but you might need to make the first move....if you meet someone you like, don't be afraid to ask them round for coffee or to bring their little one around to play.

As you've said this isn't really an Old Style topic, so I'll move it across to the Families board where hopefully you'll get lots of replies that will help.

Pink

thriftlady_2

Hi Princess Lou, sorry to hear you're feeling lonely.
Why not try Home Start ? They were great when I was at home with my first baby and didn't know anyone. My health visitor set up a visit from one of their volunteers and she came a few times to my house to chat and drink coffee and then she offered to go with me to a toddler group at which I made lots of friends (all of whom I've lost touch with now lol). Home Start is not just for families who are struggling or who have problems, they can help you just to get out and about.

vij

Have you thought about volunteering to help a charity or group you are passionate about, helping out in a school/nursery/youth club, working with a mentoring service for young people, joining a political party helping a swimming or sports club, joining a writers circle, knitting club, painting group, hope you find some friends near you soon x

Pink.

thriftlady wrote: »

Hi Princess Lou, sorry to hear you're feeling lonely.
Why not try Home Start ? They were great when I was at home with my first baby and didn't know anyone.

Doh! :doh: Why did I forget about Home Start! It's a fantastic organisation! I volunteered for them for eight years so would second thriftlady's suggestion of getting in touch with your local one. Volunteers are there to give support and friendship to other mothers in exactly the position you are in.

I first volunteered when my youngest was 9 months old and in my time with the organisation was placed with three different families who have become firm friends. Volunteering also helped me to gain confidence so that I felt able to take courses and eventually went back to work after fourteen years of being a SAHM.

So it works both ways. It's not just a 'charity'. Volunteers and families can, and do, help each other.

Pink

princess_lou

thanku to everyone.. im sorry my 1st msg didntmake much sense, was upset and just needed to ask 4 help asap, ikeep going to look 4 help bt never doing it.. and ended up having an outburst this mrning.. im just feeling v.lonely all the time and a little bit like im just sittin my life away(dnt mean to be dramatic) just find it hard because i always had friends around and now havnt 4 a LONG time.. oh at wrk all day, and sat evening sometimes wrks at legion.we moved to surrey and When i was pregnant i was v sick and so just managed to drp older one at school b4 coming home, so not great socialising there.. then oh had car accident and was off wrk 4 a while and looked after him.. when baby was born found out he had heart prob so he was in hosp 4 bout a mnth.. then in and out after that.. had op bout 7wks ago.. so now i just feel isolated and have no convo other then arranging older son playdates.. did pass an exam to get into college but we cnt afford the child care so thats a no go now.. i feel like im going mad, and quite depressed to be honest..

thriftlady_2

You know, a visit to your GP might not be a bad idea if you're feeling depressed, or ask your HV for advice;)

Spendless

Hi, My HV ran a weekly coffee morning for parents with baby newborn to walking. I'm still friendly with the mums I made there. I've also made friends thru courses run by my kids school, does yours do anything like this. They often put on a creche for the little ones. Is there a children's centre (Surestart) that also has many things running.