I want a puppy - hubby doesn't.... can I change his mind? EDIT: HE HAS!!

moomin5

If you look into some of the smaller rescue's you'll probably find they are more flexible regarding children than the larger well known rescues. I know most of the greyhound groups local to me will home with children and assess the dogs as to whether they'll suit young/older or adult only homes (they also cat test). Most pedigree breeds have a rescue group that specifically deal with that breed.

Be warned that pups do have a tendancy to mouth and have sharp teeth. There are advantages with getting an adult dog so don't rule them out. Often much of the work has already been done, they don't need to go to the loo as often and you can see what they are like temperament wise. A decent rescue would be able to match you up with a suitable dog/pup, many will of come from a family situation but may have ended up in rescue due to loss of job, working hours increasing, having to move house etc

devotee

Have a look here about the breeds: http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/

You'll be fine with a puppy, I've never had a dog before and I do remember first two weeks were a bit hard as you need to adjust to the pup and vice versa, but after that it was fine. And they do give you signals when they want to do toilet so you can pick him up and take it to the right place.
As long as you give it attention and teach him good manners - they need mental stimulation as well as exercise, so some training twice a day for 5 mins is enough.
Socialisation is also very important, get him to see many different things, people, dogs, sounds etc, make it a positive experience and everything else is just a common sense. Good luck!

Mojisola

If you've never owned a dog, I don't think a puppy is a good idea. A well-trained, stable older dog will be much easier to cope with. If you take on a puppy, both of you are learning at the same time and problems may well occur.

Our current dog came from a rescue centre. He was a stray, had obviously been well-loved and well looked after and is a wonderful pet.

thriftmonster

We got our first rescue dog from Wood Green and at the time there was a joke that it was easier to adopt a baby from Cambs Social Services than it was to get a dog from Wood Green. They were certainly very thorough on interviews, visits etc. Our dog was labelled as no kids - because they didn't know as he'd come from a home with no kids - but when we had children he was great with them. We adopted him when he was 7 - and he lived to 17.

One of our current dogs we got at 4 (he's 10 now) and he was fantastic with the kids - house trained and still full of energy - and the USPCA were ok about him going to a house with children.

UKTigerlily

You can't do Flyball until the Pup is 12 months old & ifn it's good with other people & dogs which it may or may not be, but it's fab they do it close by! I agree with the person who said try smaller Rescues, RSPCA said no to me yet the first small Rescue thought i'd give a Dog a great home & I have!
I got a 5yr old Staff & she is perfect, so now i'd never go near a breeder & at only 5 she still has 5/6yrs maybe more to go!

liz545

Just to add a bit of background, often the reason a lot of dogs in rescue say "not suitable for children" is if the dog comes in as a stray, the centre doesn't have much of a history on it. So it may well turn out to be fine with kids, but they can't responsibly rehome it without knowing for sure. And to add another voice in favour of a rescue dog, a lot of dogs end up in rescues aged around 18 months-two years as they can get a bit boisterous when they go through adolescence. So a steadier, mature adult dog might be more suitable. Battersea have a lot of staffies, they rehome outside of the London area, and they'd be able to advise you on a dog that's suitable for a young family home...

foreign_correspondent

To be fair, if you are considering a staffy, I think a 'responsible staffy breeder' is a contradiction in terms at the moment... they have been bred by so many people looking to make a quick buck, and bought by so many on impulse, that the rescues are overflowing with staffies, of all ages, including lots of pups, of this breed in particular, when peple find they cannot sell them, or decide to dump a pregnant b1tch... they are the breed most likely to end up being put to sleep because there are more staffies than good homes... so anyone who really cares anything about this breed will not be looking to breed more, IMHO...

You also say...

We also have 2 children - a DD of 6 and a DS of 5 who has autism (this is why I think a puppy would be better as it would adapt to him and his behaviour) he loves playing with my friends dog, in fact he will spend HOURS throwing a ball for the dog and when we helped walk it when she was on holiday he was brilliant when walking and stayed with me when usually he would be running off and needs restraining. My friend actually told me that on the odd occassion she looks after him he just spends the whole time with the dog.

Having worked with autistic kids, I have to say, an older steady dog would be far more suited to your little boy, preferably one that has lived with children in the past, or been fostered in a family home with children whilst in rescue. Also, one who plays ball would be an advantage - some dogs are ball mad, others are not interested - mine is not! (bear in mind that he would not be able to play ball with a pup anyway) your little boy may not be too interested in a dog that does not want to play ball, or who is a little reserved towards him in general!

A staffie would be a excellent choice, they are one of the few breeds recomended by the KC as being good with kids. Thay are robust little dogs, and very tolerant, with a high pain threshold, so are far less likely to get grumpy with a little one who accidentially pokes them in the eye, or pulls an ear.

You say that your little boy, whe visiting your friend,

just spends the whole time with the dog

- an older dog would be far more likely to tolerate and enjoy this sort of attention than a pup is!

You also say

DD was afraid of dogs until recently but my neighbours dog is so nice she is now at a place where we could consider it.

- just bear in mind that this is a steady adult dog, that has gained her confidence... all pups go through a stage of mouthing and nipping, and it hurts - they have sharp, needle-like little teeth!

As an adult, it is easier to ignore this behaviour, BUT children tend to squeal, flap their arms, and run, which excites the pup and makes them think it is a game, so it encourages them to do it again... trying to manage this, especially with an autistic little one, and another one that is a little nervous of dogs anyway could be a nightmare, and could well make it hard for your daughter to not be scared of it. There was a lady who posted on here while ago, I think, whose grandkids were terrified of her pup for this reason, and it had become a real problem.

I think it would be very sensible to consider a rescue dog, but it has to be the right dog for you, which sometimes requires a little searching and patience - have a look at this site:
http://www.dogsblog.com/

If you scroll down and look on the right, (under the woman wearing a t-shirt!) and Click on SEARCH BY CRITERIA you can choose to look at dogs tagged with the term 'good with children' - the list changes all the time, and you can also sign up for email notifications.

You could also post a 'homes offered ad' here - http://www.dogpages.org.uk/forums/index.php?showforum=3 (you need to register first) loads of rescues use this site and are always trying to match individual dogs with the right families, so may be able to suggest suitable dogs... if you do so, give as much info as possible re: your kids, cats etc... if you say you want a steady little dog who is great with kids, cat friendly, and loves fetching ball etc, you may just hit lucky!

It is also worth remembering that even pups bought up with kids and cats are not bound to grow up kid and cat friendly - I think there is a degree of individual personalities in it, which is probably nature rather than nurture! When I was a kid, we always had dogs and cats, and we only ever had one dog who liked the cats! When you get an adult dog from a reputable rescue you can at least assess the dog as an adult, whereas with a pup, there is an element of pot luck as to what sort of temprement it will have as an adult!

ETA - this is possibly the longest post in the world! Sorry :-)

moomin5

foreign_correspondent wrote: »

It is also worth remembering that even pups bought up with kids and cats are not bound to grow up kid and cat friendly - I think there is a degree of individual personalities in it, which is probably nature rather than nurture!

My neighbour got a staffy as a pup and he says that it doesn't get on well with their cat, so the cat has the run of the upstairs and the dog the downstairs. Its a confident cat too, lil begger often wanders in my garden and calmy saunters past while winding my dogs up as there on lead ( luckily for cat :rolleyes:).

blue_monkey_2

Thanks for all of the posts and for giving me lots to think about. I'll be honest and say we will no doubt start at Wood Green and go from there but on looking I also found a small shelter just up the road from here too. I would prefer to give a home to a shelter dog for obvious reasons but I've got a good 6 weeks yet because of the wedding, it would be unfair of us to get one before then as we have to go away for the weekend.

Yes, lots and lots to read through and think about, thank you all very much for your time.

astonsmummy

So anymore thought on the dog?

We are getting a Staffy pup on the 10th, she is gorgeous!
The woman we are getting her off is not one of these back street breeders, her whole house is covered in books, pics and basically everything staffy, if there is a question you have about staffy's she knows the answer.
We have seen the pups with both Mum and Dad too, the breeder regulary updates us on how she is doing (we have her on FB and she texts us too)
She's KC registered, her gandfather is Cashalee charmer @ crossguns http://www.champdogs.co.uk/stud-dog/7948.html
My OH's cousin has one of her last pups, and he is fine, has never pood on the carpets or chewed anything either, the breeder is also still in contact with them, she asks for pics as she has a sort of 'family' tree of all her pups.