Attending weddings - so expensive! sob sob

lemoncheesecake

How do you manage these sorts ofthings when on tight budget? Have no choice, already RSVP'd and would feel too guilty if I cancelled.

Costs are: £140 accomodation, £70 diesel, £12 dry cleaning hubbies suit, £35 on new dress for me - then there's money for drinks when we're there (probably another £30) plus need to get present but the couple have asked for cash so feel I should out more into the envelope than I'd actually sepnd on a gift iykwim so another £30

thats: £317 :eek:
I've scrimped to get a £500 contimgency since we went onto a DMP and feeling a tad resentful that over half of it is going to be wiped out.

hassle hassle grrrrr

pie81

yes weddings are really expensive... and they all seem to come at once!

I wonder if you might be able to cut it down a bit

- £140 is quite a lot for accommodation, might there be cheaper B&Bs or pub rooms nearby?

- £70 diesel - can you get a lift with other guests, or offer others a lift and split the fuel costs? depending on location it's possible it might be cheaper to take the train and get a local taxi from the station, if you can get an advance or group ticket deal...

- present - definitely don't feel pressured into giving more just cos they've asked for cash!! if you feel you ought to give cash, give them the smaller amount you would have spent on a normal present - in a nice card with a personal message, this is (or should be!) worth more to them than the extra ££

- instead of a new dress, could you wear an old one with some different accessories? could you borrow one off a friend? i've done this - we swap dresses every summer as there are SO many weddings!

just a few ideas,

Zoology_Dragon

Urgh, tell me about it, we've had five this year. FIVE! All very close friends too so we could hardly not go.

Not sure I can give much advice with costs but this is how we've tried to keep costs down:

- I got a Monsoon dress from an outlet store for 33 pounds.
- Drive there and back in a day if possible to save paying for accomodation. We did this for one (5 hr return journey!) but the others were too far.
- Drink the wine you get with the meal etc. then switch to water. No need to spend money on drinks.
- Gift-wise, stick to your budget, don't go over just because it's cash.
- Leave plenty of time for the journey and drive economically to save money on fuel.
- Take a flask and sandwiches for the journey so you don't end up spending a fortune at service stations.

Fortheloveofmoney

As someone that has recently gotten married I can honestly say that we would rather have the people attend than worry about buying a present. If you can't afford one then don't give one.

We had people travelling from Newcastle down to Berkshire for our wedding which meant them staying 2 nights. Our venue was £80 per night. They contacted us and asked if we could accomodate them elsewhere and we managed to find a friend to put them up. If you don't ask, you don't get.

Also, if you really need to give a present then buy a bottle of nice wine or champagne and write on the label to keep for their 1st wedding anniversary. A few people did this for us and we loved the idea. Or maybe buy a nice photoframe. Just because someone asks for something, it doesn't mean you have to give it.

Jennykins

Weddings are SO expensive!! Even by being VERY careful with what I'm spending, it is still all adding up. I managed to get a dress from Ebay for £23.94 (including postage). I had to replace the zip on it (£10). I have found the cheapest B&B (2 nights at £28/night). I am getting a lift there from my bro (£10 petrol money) and got the cheapest flight back (£42.48).

So that is £142.42 so far. Still to get a present & will need some money whilst I am actually down there (meals, drinks etc). Hoping to try & keep it under the £200 mark but we shall see!

Horace

Weddings can be expensive and if someone asks for cash you don't need to give it (personally, I think it is rather rude to ask for cash). When I am faced with that situation I never give cash - I visit the local charity shops for antique glass and look for a piece without chips (e.g. a nice fruitbowl or some serving dishes) and these can be picked up extremely cheaply - only buy the things if you like them.

You can get cheaper accommodation - ask the bride for details of local B&Bs, or even see if there is a Travelodge or Premier inn nearby as these will be cheaper - £140 for a hotel is a bit extreme. As others have said look at cheaper forms of transport too.

At the wedding itself - stick to the drinks served with the meal and then drink tap water (they will charge for bottled water), don't get embroiled into buying rounds as this will bump the price up.

There is no need to buy a new dress - accessorise one that you already have, borrow from a friend or even look in a charity shop (you can get some great bargains).

linz

Agree the accommodation looks a bit steep. Is there a Travellodge/Oldenglishinn etc nearby instead?

Transport - National Express/Megabus instead??

See if there are any nice dresses in the charity shops - I got one a few months ago for a friends wedding that was only £3.

I also took my own southern comfort in my bag and only bought lemonade.

Valentina2

Like Linz, I have taken my own alcohol to weddings/parties and just bought cokes. Get a small plastic water bottle that will fit in your handbag and fill it with alcohol before you go.
I agree with the other posters that you don´t have to give cash just because they have asked for it. How about getting a bottle of wine and printing your own special greeting on it?

AMBERSHADOW

I had one yesterday and that was expensive

k_bagpuss

This thread made me smile. My friend is getting married next Feb at Gleneagles. She did give all the family / friends a years notice (i.e; to get saving!) as to stay for 1 night it's a cost of £200 - and believe me - that's well discounted as the rooms she's managed to get the hotel to give us are usually £520 per night.:eek:

In her defence I think the fact she gave the amount of notice she did is good, and at the end of the day it's her special day and the venue is one she set her heart on getting married in a long time ago. My partner gasped at the prices at first, and we did start to look around at nearby B&B's as it's a long drive up there so driving up on the day of the wedding isn't really viable but we've decided to stay there for 2 nights and we're treating it as a lovely weekend for ourselves too. I look at it as an opportunity to stay there with the rates being set as they are otherwise it absolutely would not be an option for us to do so

[Deleted User]

I had my friends wedding at the beginning of August. I had set a budget of £75 for a dress as I was going all day and didn't really have an outfit that was suitable. In the end my dress cost me £8 from Tesco in the spring sale down from £15 :j:j
The amount of compliments I got about it as well were great, a few people actually thought it was a Monsoon dress!! Tesco, Asda and Sainsbury's are all good for their dresses.
My friends also had a wedding list although I did get them vouchers for the place where the list was held. I didn't spend more than I could afford.
My brother and sister in law asked for Vouchers and money and explained to people it was so they could redecorate their kitchen but they did get quite a few presents as well.

Don't spend what you can't afford.