Spina Bifida/housing !!!!!!/discrimination/neighbours/depression

ageandjo

Is there anyone out there willing to lend their helpful advice re the title and many more related issues as we don't know where to turn?

stripeyfox

I'm sure there is plenty advice on all the subjects from people on here. You are in the right place. But it will probably help if you could expand on your problems a little.

ageandjo

Too much to post on here really, are there any web sites that anyone can point us to?

dinkie_2

http://www.youreable.com/TwoShare/getPage/Community/Introduction

Not sure if this is exactly what you're looking for, but it might be helpful to post there, as they might know of contacts or there might be others who are dealing with similar issues. There is a 'general' section in the forum, where it might be best to post first. Otherwise, I'd recommend the CAB.

Best of luck, Cat

ageandjo

You will have to bear with me as everything is rushing round my head and I may waffle a bit.
Ok my boyfriend who was born with Spina Bifida Hydrocephlious and has the usual complications that come with this, we have been together 4 years and in those 4 years I have seen/learnt and been amazed by many.
He moved out of his family home when he was 17 he is now 37, he moved out to be independant and to 'find his way'. He moved into a rented flat that was partly paid for by the council, this was the first time he had claimed anything, he received housing benefit, c tax benefit and DLA. he became depressed at staying in at home and decided to start doing a few small deliveries for someone in his van this became a little more regular and he started getting more money,there were days weeks and even months when he was not able to do anything as ulcars were on soles of his feet and numerous kidney infections and stays in london hospitals, at this point he had two options 1. Give up his flat and all benefits and work full time to pay bills and suffer severley with health.
2.Give up working and stay at home and claim everything he could (he didnt want to do this)
So he carried on sometimes working and sometimes unable to even get out of bed and just about manage to crawl to the kitchen to get a drink. This carried on for a while in the meantime he moved to a housing association bungalow on the day he moved in his neighbours made complaints about him being noisey moving furniture in ( how anyone moves in quietly beats me)( I will get to the neighbours in a bit)
Last year out of the blue he had a letter from the housing association saying that they had found an invoice in a bag of rubbish that belonged to him and they passed it onto the council...Fraud investigators got involved and it ended going to court and he was looking to be put in prison for seven years for fraud!!
He didnt go to prison but has to pay every penny back £21,000 in total. as you can imagine there were tears illness depression and stress for ages regarding this. He knows he had done wrong but the way he was treated over the whole thing was discusting. He was tagged for four months too.
Now he does NOT claim a penny, has to work all the hours god sends ill or not to pay debts back and full rent and full council tax and all c tax repayents and HB repayments, as you can imagine his health has slipped so much and worries me terribly, I work full time and help pay anything I can.
Anyhow the neighbours I was talking about have ganged up on the both of us for some reason (they dont know about his history I dont think) they complain about everything to the housing association, we have NEVER done anything wrong to anyone and would help anyone we used to say hello to the neighbours but they blanked us numerous times so in the end we didnt bother saying anything. There are two couples in the neighbourhood who are intent on making my partner and I move. There are only 2 parking bays allocated to 2 bungalows in our little square and both of them are for the nasty neighbours, the complain to the HA if we drive up onto the small green outside the bungalow to unload heavy shopping or a fridge or something, they watch and laugh as we struggle this upsets me.
it turns out that one of the neighbours in question is a tenant director of the HA and she obviously thinks she can boss us about, both couples are fully abled and I have to watch my partner struggle finding a place to park and walk to the bungalow ( he has a blue badge bay that he requested but someone who can walk perfectly ok uses it all the time, they put a badge in their window but not sure whats wrong with them) We had mediation to try and resolve this but there were NOT willing to participate so that was that.
February my car was broken into I called the police got a crime number they caused lots of damage, last month the car was fixed (new door skin) one week later it was done again, I was so gutted I called the police, fingerprint team came out and found noting, I told the police that someone had cctv that pointed in that direction. On the evening that I reported it to the police I had parked my car outside the bungalow on the council green as the door was not secure, I went outside to lock it and one of the nasty neighbours took photos of my car and me! This scared me and I wondered what they were doing and perhaps I was being targeted? I called the police and told them this and could an officer come out to see me because I was scared ( the neighbour that took the photo often shouts threats to my partner and myself)
To date I have not seen one officer and I have made a total of 9 phone calls to them and 1 e-mail asking when someone was coming to see me we just keep getting told 3 days. My partner called the police for me the other day because I came in in tears as I was scared. I saw the neighbour who took the photo walking down the path so i asked him 'why did you take pics of me and my car' he just mumbled abuse at us so I just called him a W***er and went indoors, the next day a policeman turns up at the door NOT ABOUT THE CAR but beacuse he said I threated him!
So anyway this has taken its toll I took my partner to the doctors the other day and he explained how he was feeling and she has prescribed him anti depressants because of everything thats happend. I worry myself silly about him as he tells me he cant take anymore and wants to end it all, we dont know what to do or where to turn.
Sorry to rant on but I needed to say all this and to hear your views.
Thank you

Ted_Hutchinson

While his past benefit claim record won't make a new claim easier it shouldn't prevent a new claim for DLA if the Physical and Mental health problems warrent it.
But given his history it would be worth ensuring the claim went through a Welfare Rights Adviser so everything was shipshape from the start.
I really don't know what to suggest with the neighbours. Where I live there are two different sets of neighbours at loggerheads and both sets of couples are making their lives a misery by badtempered bickering and obnoxious behaviour. As I'm on good terms/indifferent to all of them I hear all sides of all stories and the only way I think their disputes will end is if in each dispute one of the parties moves house. When there is is history of bad feeling and threatening behaviour it's almost impossible to forget and forgive.
If you can make a fresh start somewhere else then this would probably be the easiest solution. I know it's probably not your fault but taking action against the perpetrators is going to cause as much stress and distress as the effort of moving and making a fresh start.

Fran

Spina Bifida/
The Scottish Spina Bifida Association
ASBAH

housing !!!!!!/
You should go through the complaints procedure of the Housing Association if you have a complaint about them.

discrimination/
If you are referring to the way other Housing Association tenants are treating you, again, go through the complaints procedure.

neighbours/
As above.

depression
Have you seen the doctor for yourself?

Savvy_Sue

I'm unclear if there's a complaint about the actual Housing Association, or just the neighbours who are also tenants of the HA. If it's the latter, then asking to see your Housing Officer would be the step to take before a formal complaint. If you could make an appointment to see them at the office, this would mean the neighbours shouldn't know. Your HO may also be able to offer additional support either him/herself or through a Tenancy Support Officer (or something like that).

alice's_mum

he has a blue badge bay that he requested but someone who can walk perfectly ok uses it all the time, they put a badge in their window but not sure whats wrong with them)

Can't help with most of this but I know that our local council has started identifying "disabled" parking bays with the number of the Blue badge that is eligible to use it. a block of OAP flats near us had bays outside that were used by anyone parking on the main road. Now the 3 bays have signs that say "for use by badge number............. only". And I have seen this enforced by traffic wardens. Try finding out if you can have this bay id'd to your bf's blue badge. It's not much but if he can park and get to the house easier it's something.

Savvy_Sue

alice's_mum wrote:

Can't help with most of this but I know that our local council has started identifying "disabled" parking bays with the number of the Blue badge that is eligible to use it. a block of OAP flats near us had bays outside that were used by anyone parking on the main road. Now the 3 bays have signs that say "for use by badge number............. only". And I have seen this enforced by traffic wardens. Try finding out if you can have this bay id'd to your bf's blue badge. It's not much but if he can park and get to the house easier it's something.

And if you find it's not the council's responsibility to do this (because it's on the HA land), then ask the HA if they will identify the bays as 'assigned' to particular houses / flats.