Taxis back to basics...debt and mortgage free before 50(feb 2014)

taxi73

hypno06 wrote: »

**nag alert**

Yes, I know that the intention is to GET a buffer zone, but you yourself typed the magic words....."if I didn't find the lump, I would have been at work".

Exactly my point - you never know when you will be off work and you have to take time out when you need.....and you have to account for those "down times" workwise.

You had the money in the bank saving to pay off the loans. You chose to pay the credit card off with it, wiping out your savings, and at the same time you are not working, so not earning, and now you are stressing because you haven't got the money to pay the next lot of bills.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing, perhaps, but that WAS a buffer zone - you could have dipped into it to cover this time away from work, and at least reduced a bit of stress.

Like I say, I know I am nagging, and I know that it is easy to look back and say "you should have done", but I have "known" you a long time on here and it is not the first time this type of thing has happened, and I think you need to have another LBM type of thing!

Hope you don't mind me saying. I just don't think you need this type of stress going forward and you need to acknowledge in your own mind that there are big changes that need to be made in order that you avoid that worry when the unexpected happens.

Sorry thiswas the post I meant to quote in my last post(told you I can't think straight(

taxi73

Wol2 wrote: »

Not a panic attack per se - these tend to come out of nowhere when there is no perceived threat. You clearly have something that is concerning you, and until you visit the hospital tomorrow, you won;t know where you stand so the whole thing atm seems completely outside of your control and of course is very frightening :grouphug::grouphug:. Disempowerment is a very very stressful feeling....and it is perfectly OK for you to feel scared in this situation :grouphug::grouphug:. The symptoms you describe are a reaction to this very real stress/fear - so would more likely be classed as anxiety....still involves the release of adrenalin and the fight/flight principle so symptoms are similar in respect of heart racing, light headed etc.

Can you occupy/distract yourself by focusing on something nice that you enjoy - be it listening to music, watching a DVD, doing a crossword, gardening etc ( I find ironing in front of Pirates or Harry Potter very soothing as it keeps me concentrated on something ).

[STRIKE]If[/STRIKE] When your mind starts wandering and the heart starts pounding, sit down in a comfy chair and try to relax. Take deep measured breaths and think yourself somewhere nice (I think about lying in the sun on a tropical beach....or wandering through a wood full of bluebells ) until the physiological effects calm down. (Alternatively I also find cuddling a piggie helps enormously;) And if you know any yoga, I understand that can help too)

Big Long Hugs Hun.....you WILL get through this. Courage ma souer, us DFW's are made of strong stuff ......we will deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes. You are NOT alone :kisses3:

xxxx

Thanks...lying on a nice sun soaked beach would be nice.
I am just being silly..I guess

hypno06

Sometimes, when things don't go according to plan, it can be the kick up the backside that we need to re-group and focus on what we need to do, rather than what we previously thought we needed to do.

I know that in the last few months, I have been forced to re-think, and it is proving to be a very positive element within quite a negative period of time.....which hopefully means that in the long run, I will be better off - not just financially, but emotionally mentally, and physically too.

I am sure that, whatever the outcome tomorrow, this recent period will prove to have positive elements to it going forward.

taxi73

milann wrote: »

fingers, toes and everything else crossed for a positive visit tomorrow. I'm hoping you don't have to wait too long for any results.

Milan

Thanks ....I'm hoping I don't have to wait long either:eek::eek::eek:...I don't even know what tests they will do there and then or what I have to wait for..it's this part of not knowing thats hard.

penguin83

Hi Taxi, hope you are ok. Sorry to hear about the system going down and on a Saturday as well, what a pain! OH's work has been really bad this week - friday night he came home after 9 hours with £87.00 - before taking out the expenses, shocking! xx

taxi73

Karmacat wrote: »

Wol's right about this being a real fear, and about distracting yourself too - don't have any stimulants like caffeine either, you're releasing too much adrenaline into your system right now cos of the anxiety, and stimulants just give you more. Something you like thats non taxing is good - and I go for Harry Potter too, by the way, or Stargate - the visual imagery Wol mentions, or a pet (I don't know if you have pets, Taxi, do you?) is great too. If you feel like it, some kind of physical activity that will mop up some of the adrenaline - a stiff walk, a bout of cleaning, a session on the Wii, whatever feels right for you.

What you eat - I'd say, keep it to complex carbs and veggies, not too much fat or sugar. When I'm stressed like this, the adrenalin gets to my digestive system somehow, I don't know the precise interactions, but fear is known to do that - and you get diahor....wotsit. And keep posting! What you've done, what you plan to do, in the next 2 hours, the next two years, what vows you've made to change your life. Anything at all, really!

Lots and lots of hugs.

Your right with the what to eat bit as I've had the diahor..(as you put it)
Am going to find stuff to occupy myself later..don't know what yet but will think of something.
My favourite programme is House ...absolutely love it and have a load of them to watch yet.

taxi73

penguin83 wrote: »

Hi Taxi, hope you are ok. Sorry to hear about the system going down and on a Saturday as well, what a pain! OH's work has been really bad this week - friday night he came home after 9 hours with £87.00 - before taking out the expenses, shocking! xx

Sorry to hear that Penguin..that's really bad!!!!!
The system was down last night from about 10pm until 1am and then back down at 4am until 10.30am....seems to be up and running since then according to the office.
I only know as I begrudgingly went to pay my subs cheque in about an hour ago.
Hope it gets busy for your DH as I know how disheartening it is sitting about waiting for a job!!!....

taxi73

hypno06 wrote: »

Sometimes, when things don't go according to plan, it can be the kick up the backside that we need to re-group and focus on what we need to do, rather than what we previously thought we needed to do.

I know that in the last few months, I have been forced to re-think, and it is proving to be a very positive element within quite a negative period of time.....which hopefully means that in the long run, I will be better off - not just financially, but emotionally mentally, and physically too.

I am sure that, whatever the outcome tomorrow, this recent period will prove to have positive elements to it going forward.

There most certainly will be a regrouping..no matter what the outcome is....will let you know when I know.

taxi73

dizzy_lizzie wrote: »

Just sending a big hug
Luvz Dizzy x

Thanks....need them at the minute x

taxi73

I am going to have to think about a lot of what's going on in our lives here.
It is all work and no fun...I seriously need to address that issue.
We need to have fun as we never know what is around the corner at any given time.This last week has taught me that much.
I also need to cut the stress in my life!!!
We also need to have our holidays as we work so hard..so need to get that back on the agenda as well.

The loans can definitely take their course .
The CCS can have their min payments + DHs pension and DDs board....past that I don't know.
I need to keep some money in the bank as well.

Once the CCs are gone..I was going to throw everything at the mortgage but am thinking of having some kind of life..so may just pay less off but even if I never overpay it will be gone in 2018 anyway....
any overpayments sit in the savings pot so are acccessible at anytime so are a good way of keeping money seperate.


Sorry about the waffle..I'm just thinking out loud.