How can I get DH to do things MSE without taking his card away

FairyElephant_2

Separate banks accounts, with a joint account for 'household stuff' - bills, mortgage, groceries etc, etc,- in which both of you deposit an agreed amount each month, and if you can afford it a separate joint 'savings for emergency' account to build up a rainy-day fund.

Don't have cash-cards for the household account or savings account, or if you do, don't carry them with you all the time.

Then if he is spending/wasting money, it's his own money from his account, not your joint funds!

Sometimes 'you can lead a horse to water.......' as they say!

jackomdj

Show him Martins calculator that shows how much you spend on things eg a capuccino every work day etc. - I am sure it is on the front page but have not looked at it for a long time.

System

jackomdj wrote: »

Show him Martins calculator that shows how much you spend on things eg a capuccino every work day etc. - I am sure it is on the front page but have not looked at it for a long time.

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/protect/demotivator/

ManOnTheMoon

Take the lead out the back of the Sky Box, tell him you've been cut off and now can't watch the football, talk to him, make him agree to be more careful, then once he has agreed, plug the Sky Box back in and say 'ooh look, we have been reconnected'

I'm making assumptions you have Sky and he likes football, but...

I agree with those who say add up his wastage and show it to him at the end of the month

ailuro2

Count up how much he wastes on those £1.50 withdrawals over a month.

Decide if you really want to argue over £3.00

There may be a better battle for you to choose in moneysaving.

If it's more than that, go out and buy yourself a really nice and obviously expensive and frivolous gift that he would like, to the same value as the bank charges.

Tell him if he stops using banks that charge for a month he can have the gift as it's the equivalent value.

Now what you might not be thinking of - it might be better for him to use the local ATM and pay the charges as it would cost petrol money to get to the free ATM, or that the free ATM is next to the pub and if he walks a bit extra he'd be tempted to have a quick pint while he was there.

Probably not, but worth thinking about as he might use this as his excuse.



BUT.....the way I'd do it to try for a longer term mind shift..I bet there are other things costing you more money though. Are your fuel bills switched to the cheapest provider, are your bank accounts in the best savings account, is your mortgage at the best rate it can be at, do you swop down a brand at the supermarket on everything you can, do you use a cashback credit card but pay it off in full to get the cashback and keep your own money in the bank earning extra interest, do you use Quidco to get an extra £50 at car insurance renewal time, have you phoned up Virgin media and threatened to move to get £25 a month off your package??:D

You'll find that by saving big chunks of money and showing him where you've saved it, and keeping the money in a separate account there will soon be enough saved for a really nice treat - and then he can be asked to add to the fund by giving up the £1.50 ATM.

ladybirdintheuk

I would echo the spreadsheet idea. That is what I'm working on with my DH at the mo - he goes off into town on a Saturday then takes out £20, then another £20 then another £20, and doesn't realise how much it all adds up to. When I did a spreadsheet last week he had spent £300 in 2 weeks :eek: (Well, £300 had come out in cash, although some of that was bus fair money, and it is possible I took out £10 at some point, although I don't think I did.)

Another idea - if you have a budget, and you know how much spending money he is left with, could you get him to take out his £100 (or whatever it is) at the beginning of the month, leave his card at home, and then he can see the cash disapearing?