Fussy Eaters (merged)

kr15snw

kindofagilr wrote: »

Sorry I dont have any actual advice, but I was such a fussy eater when I was a kid, and I think Mam just gave me what I liked, and stopped trying to give me things I didnt like, cos it was a waste of food (and we couldnt afford to waste food)

Eventually as I got older, I just started trying new things, and now I love a wide variety of food.

He will grow out of it.

Im the opposite unfortunately. My mum gave in to me and let me eat what I want.

Now at the age of 22 I still cant stand any fruit and most veg, simply because I never got the taste of it as a child

Keep going with the 'eat it or go hungry' tactic. I wish my mum had done this to me.

jellyhead

JBD wrote: »

I was advised by my health visitor to give him the things that he did eat and not to make a fuss.

I was told the same by a dietician, after she'd checked the nutritional content of what he was willing to eat over a few days.

To begin with I was told by the health visitor to force him to eat what I was having, by letting him starve until he gave in. It didn't work, and he was quite ill, too weak to walk etc. and became anaemic. I saw the doctor, and he referred us to a dietician whose focus was on his reaction to food, his phobias, the anxiety at mealtimes (mostly caused by me, she thought, although I hadn't realised it).

My boy would eat breakfast and lunch (dry, nothing touching). He would have dry cereal, and lunch would be a mix of things that were dry and didn't touch each other, just habit I suppose, we always have a cold packed lunch type lunch. He wouldn't eat sandwiches, but would eat bread and butter, toast or crackers.

The evening meal caused problems, and it was because he hated 'mixed' things, as has been mentioned.

The dietician also helped me realise that while the evening meal was the biggest of the day for me, my son preferred to fill up earlier on, and wasn't very hungry in the evenings. Also, he is naturally tiny whereas I thought he wasn't getting enough nutrition and it was my fault that he didn't grow.

I don't know how it would work if your child is not an only child though - mine was at the time, so if I gave him the foods he liked there wasn't another child to notice and comment.

Something the nursery did for him was have bread and butter on the table at lunchtime. Their meals tended to be wet things, like a big tray of chicken pie, cottage pie etc. - school dinner type stuff which he wouldn't eat. This way he didn't starve, but they weren't giving into him or allowing him anything the other children didn't have. Perhaps you could do that? Or have grapes etc. as a starter, rather than pudding. That way he could eat a little of what he likes and wouldn't starve, but it isn't as noticeable as a child sitting there with nothing on his plate.

Spendless

arrggh I typed a long reply and then it wouldn't take.:mad:

My now 9yo was a fussy eater at 4, very early posts on this forum by me mention it. I tried various things including once serving his dinner again and again after he decide he didn't like a meal he'd prev eaten happily (he gave in on 3rd dishing up!).

But other things calling foods a different name fishcakes became snowcakes, tomato soup became special soup.

We took them to restaurants like Indian ones where they don't have a chicken nuggets menu, even if they just ate the rices, poppadoms and breads and not the curry dish we praised the fact we were able to take them there and them eat something. Ditto if we order a take-away (friends came the other week and insisted we ordered totally different take away for kids cos 'theirs won't eat that- we did it, but if it had been mine I wouldn't have). My ds was praised by a stranger the other day who'd seen him choose a carvery meal and said how nice it was to see a child pick a 'dinner' and eat his veg.

Going on school dinners helped too so did if they had topics on different fruits or what Vikings/Greeks ate.

I also told them trying something and disliking the taste is one thing. I have food items I dislike, whinging 'buuuuttt i don't like it' without trying isn't.

sillyvixen

ailuro2 wrote: »

Experts don't recommend using sweet food as a reward for eating up your greens, but we've used the 'no dessert if you don't finish your main course' for years, and it works. Of course at first it is applied when you know they're going to eat everything up, then slowly add something they're not too keen on but have eaten in the past, then slowly you progress.

my friend employs a system of the amount of pudding her children get is directly linked to how much dinner they eat - it works she will explain' you only ate the chicken this is pudding you will only get this amount unless you eat you veg' whilst showing them a how much of a full slice of cake (or whatever) they have earned ... her son has got it down to a tee, at my house he had seconds and tried to reason with her he could have both pudding and a yoguht, while his sister took exception to my pasta (different shape than they have at home) and i had to pretend to smuggle her pudding while mum was not looking to keep up the idea of the rules but treating her as it was a special occasion!

fannyannie_2

I have the exact same problem with my ds but he's 8. He's always been a fussy eater and pretty much lives on pot noodles.
If its not something he likes he will literally go without any food for days on end. He wont eat anything that comes into contact with anything he does actually like either.
My health visitor has asked me to a food diary of everything that he eats in the next 4 days and she's going to take it to a nutrtionist to get advice.

I'd ask your health visitor if i were you.

JBD

Hi Isica, you haven't mentioned what your son likes to drink. Does he like milk- if so perhaps you could try milkshakes with a little pureed fruit to thicken it. Also fresh fruit juices are considered to be a portion of fruit, you can also add vitamin drops to ordinary juice. Also as your son seems to love potatoes does he like mash- you could try adding other mashed vegetables such as cauliflower parsnip or swede.

JBD

Sorry, meant to add, my son loves tomato ketchup and I always put some on his plate. It did help him to eat things he didn't particularly like. You can buy low salt and sugar versions if you are concerned about this. I also only put a very small amount on his plate so he didn't feel overwhelmed by the amount of food. You can always go back for seconds.

Fizog

My eldest was fussy...now 19 ...6ft ...slim...never ill, shiny hair, perfect skin and still will not eat fruit or vegetables....his diet has expanded over the years and who am I to say his diet is better than mine. I eat everything and have a bmi of 27!!
He asked to see a nutritionist at 17 and after a consultation ...he now takes a supplement imported from states which includes different minerals, vitamins etc that he is lacking in his diet; he fully understood that he should be eating veg and fruit but retches when trying anything. He does attempt from time to time try something he thinks smell nice and we always praise him even if he spits it out...have come to appreciate it is difficult for him. Nutritionist said he had a heightened sense of taste and smell and this went hand in hand with texture aversion something he had from first weaning.
I was fortunate that with his restrictive diet my DS didn't eat sweets or crisps, fizzy drinks or anything processed. Still doesn't so every cloud!
Best thing is not to lose your temper but serve up what he eats as annoying as it is to have to cook extra,,,keep your cool ....as long as your off spring is healthy I'd say it is sign of a strong personality that he dosen't follow the crowd.
Makes eating abroad difficult but there is always bread and yoghurt (without fruit bits)hunks of meat to be found. We've learned to ignores his strange habits and going out to friends house they always had ,peanut butter and cereal in so he never starved. He got hungry at cub camp when a particularly enthusaistic Akele thought she would have him eating everything by the end of the week ...she didn't and he was half a stone lighter but had had a great time...
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink...good luck!

isica1903

Hi everyone and thank you for all your replies.
I had a small breakthrough on Thursday or at least I think so.

We had Lasagne for dinner, I know he wouldn't eat it ( I know I'm mean) so made garlic bread with it so there was something he did like.
As I predicted he wouldn't eat it although he did pick up the top layer once which had gone a bit crunchy from the cheese.

Daughter turned her nose up first but then suddenly decided to eat the lot so I said she could have a yogurt for afters. DS had only eaten 2 bits of bread and wanted a yogurt too so I said you can't have one because you didn't try any of your lasagne. So to my shock he went back to his plate and took a very tiny bite. I couldn't believe it. He didn't even spit it out afterwards, so I gave him lots of praise and said have one more small bite and he did so I let him have his yogurt.
I know it was only a minute taste he got but it is something he has never ever done before. I'm probably getting a bit over excited and I don't expect him to suddenly love lasagne but I suppose it's a start.

To be honest after reading all your replies his diet isn't that bad really.
A normal days diet would be
Breakfast
Cereal, milk

Lunch
Sandwich, yogurt

Snack
apple or banana

Dinner
For example Spag Bol, he'd eat all of it
Sausage, Mash, Peas would eat sausage and maybe peas

If he eats a half decent amount he gets a dessert which is usually only a small yogurt or a bowl of strawberrys and if they eat well they might get an ice lolly.
Drinks are usually milk for breakfast and before bed and pure fruit juice during the day.

Sorry for rambling lol, just got a bit excited. Oh yes, I don't think it's a medical problem, because he only rejects the things he doesn't like if we ate Spag Bol everyday of the week he'd eat his dinner everyday.
Thanks again for everyones advice.
Isica

JBD

I think he's doing very well, and well done to you for not panicking. My son used to eat tiny amounts of the foods that he did like but you have to remember that children are different the same way that adults are. I really don't think we can force them to eat things they really don't like but give them the opportunity to try new foods all the time.